D.L. Warner's Blog: The Perilous and Profane, page 5

Month of Fun 2013 Wrap Up

The Month of Fun for 2013 is now over, but as last weekend illustrated quite graphically, there is always spill over into June an beyond. That is a teas and a half, but I'll go into more detail about the weekend's shenanigans later. Let's get to the recap of last month's big fun!
A quick note from last week's blog: Whitey Bulger, it turns out, was hiding in plain site at the Borders Books and Music that I worked at along with Craig, Marie and Phil. I always thought so. It just stood to reason given the general insanity of that store.
For more photos from the MoF 2013, go here: http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_8369.html
Rock Star
There was nothing crazy like zip lines or hang gliding going on in my life. However, I was able to do a lot of things that I haven't been able to do at all in years. The biggest feat for me was to be useful on a full production set for a whole shift and it didn't put me in bed for a week. Now, I couldn't run around all over the place like a hummingbird the way I could ten years ago. Let's be clear about that. I had to keep my gear in my little rolling cart most of the time. I needed to have a home base where I sat a lot of the time though I was within easy reach of the main action and everything else. There was a great deal of stress from moment to moment along with the crazy surprises that can happen during a shoot. I even managed to find a nice set of crayons for some children who were with visitors to the set and found a nearby restaurant that delivered in that neighborhood for a crew member that only ate salmon (I will never mock the need for a smart phone again). You have to be a rock star every moment on a set, because the only thing anyone remembers is the one time you fail. It was a really fun day. I just wish I could share what I was working on. Alas, that is still top secret.
On a side note about smart phones and filmmaking, they are a miracle. There is so much available from my laptop (they are so in sync that it is scary), I can be on the road and access answers to a problem almost like I was home. I am in easy reach in the laundry room or at the courtyard garden. My paranoia about missing an important call has diminished all the way down to just the bathroom. I am not taking a phone in there!
Food Round Up
I did get to the number one restaurant that I really wanted to try during the Month of Fun, but I'll get to that in a moment. I also did a lot of run cooking and there were many small treats as well. Somehow, I wasn't nearly as decadent as I would have liked. I've become a responsible snacker, I suppose. For instance, I made an effort during the MoF to get up early enough to enjoy a half dozen doughnut holes from my favorite doughnut shot. This man is an absolute genius with sweet dough. Toward the end of the day you can see racks of croissants and other treats proofing for the next day. The down side of his genius is that he is typically out of everything by 10am. To snag something from this heavenly shop, I have to get up and out of the house in time to dash into the doughnut shop and get on the road to wherever I'm going. This MoF, I managed to get there three times! Joy! No, I haven't mentioned the name of the joint, nor will I. There are too many hipsters trolling the neighborhood. They've already found my favorite market and buy up my soup stock fixings. I must draw a line! The other early morning snack I adore is the Sausage Biscuit with Egg breakfast at McDonald's. I don't usually get to have that very naughty meal because it's hard for me to get through my appointments before the end of breakfast at McDonald's. There is nothing worse than taste buds
set for breakfast when the restaurant is set for lunch. Even though they are rare treats, I still make sure I pay for them. I walk two miles for each order of doughnut holes. The breakfast sandwich costs four miles. I never have them on the same day. It's not that I'm no longer a Sybarite. I'm just one that likes to stay healthy.
There were many tasty beverages that I managed to have during the MoF along with the nearly weekly martinis at the Culver Hotel. There were the margaritas for Cinco de Mayo and the Mint Julep and Sweet Iced Tea for the Kentucky Derby. I also got to partake of some lovely Vampire Merlot. And of course, there was a lot of champagne. I am so lucky to be born during the same month as Mother's Day. Champagne is on sale for the entire month!
And then there were the restaurants! The big one that I've wanted to visit for some time was Waterloo and City. It is on the same block as super star chef Roy Choi's A-Frame. The theme is British pub grub. The atmosphere is casually elegant. We went on a Monday, because it's the night of a special menu that includes one of Jon's favorite items, Fish and Chips. My party was convinced that I'd go for the Beef Wellington. I was convinced that I'd order it as well. It was the dish most often mentioned on the cooking/travel shows that included restaurants. However, it had been very warm that day. Somehow. Meat covered in puff pastry wasn't that appealing on a hot day. Instead, I went for a delightful squid ink pasta with shrimp and lobster. It may sound strange, but it was amazing. We all had the sticky toffee pudding. That was really good, but Jon and I liked the same dish at the Culver Hotel Better. Overwall, the restaurant was good, but the company made the evening great.
Cooking during the MoF was all about the tagine. I'm glad that I became a more experienced cook before getting one of these. I would have only used it for Moroccan dishes. That means, it would have had a lot of dust on it between uses. Now, that I know it to be a cooking vessel for tough cuts of meat and a low temperature, I've used it for all sorts of things. Most notably, I roasted baby back ribs in that puppy. They were so good that they needed no sauce. I've used them for chicken parts for the slow cook in a relatively quick time. The possibilities are mind boggling and I haven't really cracked open the cookbook that came with the thing! That was a very good gift for the MoF. But then, all of the lovely, thoughtful gifts this year made me so very happy. They mostly showed that my family and friends really know me well. That's always a fun thing.


For more photos from the MoF 2013, go here: http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_8369.html
Wrap-up
All in all, it's been an excellent Month of Fun personally, professionally and emotionally. And this was very fortunate as I now have an inbox so scary that it should have me cowering in a fetal position in the nearest closet. How will I work my way out of this?
Stay tuned!

But wait, I haven't explained what Jon and I were doing sketching nekkid people last weekend. I don't want to short change the event, so explanations will have to wait for the next blog. Believe me, it's worth it.

Month of Fun 2013 - Part One

Me lately.Month of Fun 2013 - Craig
Craig called me to find out what Whitey Bulger's http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whitey_Bulger defense strategy would be. Of course, he was right that I would be keeping track of the legal proceedings. He often contacts me about sudden developments in the world of organized crime when he's out of contact with the media. I do the same when I'm a bit off the grid. This time, Craig was harassing rattle snakes during a hike into the mountains. It's rattlesnake season. Yes, we have that season in California. Craig and I are from an area and an era of the last big mob wars. Thus, such news is just something we keep track of when media watching. At the time that Whitey went on the lamb, I joked that he had to be in Santa Monica. And he had to be a denizen of the 3rd street Promenade. I was just as certain that he had to have been a frequent guest of Borders Books &Music, store #93. When it was discovered that the FBI's Most Wanted was in Santa Monica and that his hideout was full of books, we weren't surprised.
The conversation with Craig was riotously funny and completely inappropriate at times. My sides ached from laughing hours afterward. Sometimes, I think he senses that I could use a good belly laugh. Craig seems to call when I need it most. I count his calls as a gift to me. Thus, Craig is always a big part of the Month of Fun. I make sure to make time for as long as the sometimes rambling conversations take. I find chatting with him is always worth the time.
You see, indulgences during the Month of Fun are not always tangible things. The thing they all have in common is that they make me feel good. Sometimes, it's a conversation with Craig or an encounter with a favorite actor. Sometimes, it's happening by when the guy two doors down leaves for the beach shirtless and wearing tiny swim trunks. I think that is a present for everyone! Sometimes, I do a good deed as part of my Month of Fun. I won't talk about those save to say that sometimes it's good to slow down and notice things that need to be addressed and help where possible. Most of the time, that costs nothing but a little time. Now, don't get me wrong. Most of my MoF indulgences have been just that and with a capital 'I.' More on that later.MoF 2013- Birthday Blahs
The actual birthday was really low key. I awoke with a painfully sore, raw throat and the fuzzy headed feeling that heralds the onset of a cold. I was not having that. I did let it set me back for the weekend, but I had other weekends. I decided to rest with hot toddies made from the fine bourbon and brandy I bought for the Kentucky Derby the week before. I consider a well made soup and long naps indulgences as well. I made a glorious cream of chicken soup to go with the onion flat bread I had left over from pizza dough. That was great for the light meals I could tolerate. I had flavorful clear broth when I couldn't cope with more than that. It was a restful day and weekend. Another reason that I began celebrating the entire month was to keep from putting pressure on any given day. 
More photos from the past few weeks can be seen here: http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_4232.html
Big Book NewsOne of the reasons I started working for Digital Manga was the hope that I could one day get them to distribute my Yaoi novels. That plan was hatched almost three years ago. Look at what's happened now!
The image in the right hand corner are two of my characters!We're proud to announce that creator-submitted content is now available on eManga.com!
A fabulous variety of web comics, American manga, novels, and more from talented independent authors and artists is now available on eManga. Choose from over 50 newly launched indie titles! Chapter One Special Edition of Madeleine Holly-Rosing and Emily Hu's steampunk mini-series, Boston Metaphysical Society, begins the thrilling tale of an ex-Pinkerton detective and his new spirit photography partner in the backdrop of late 1800s Boston. Madison Hawthorne and Bryan Golden bring an intriguing tale of high stakes and royal bloodlines with their comic series, King of Sweden: Last Bloodline. In the charming comic One-Shot!, Rejena Smiley tells the story of an author struggling to find her way out of writer's block. In A Soldier's Choice, D.L. Warner writes a tender novel about two “Altered” soldiers battling the militaristic system they live in and their forbidden love for one another.


So much is happening so fast this month that I have to end the blog here or it would never get done. Next time, I have some film stuff to talk about and some exciting meals to talk about. Like - What is going on here with this Star Trek Character actor?
I'll leave you for now with the strange dream that I had.

I had the strangest dream about my MOAS. I dreamed that it was being done as an outpatient procedure at an office in a strip mall. For some reason, the surgeon sent Jon to the sandwich shop next door to borrow their tongs. But the sandwich people couldn't spare the tongs. They sent him away with a 'goopy' turkey sandwich instead. I woke up then. All I had to eat before dinner was a lovely piece of tiramisu cake. I hadn't even had any wine! Maybe that was the problem.
Stay tuned for more Month of Fun 2013!

Month of Fun 2013 Begins, Cooking Harvests and Critiquing Critics

The window box garden has had its challenges. The plum tomatoes had a fungus. Somehow, the whole lot of them had a gnat infestation. My Dad is really handy for this sort of thing. I wouldn't have thought of matches and a light dusting of plain flower took care of the former and the latter. I've had lots of questions about what I've been doing with the yields from the garden. I've been inspired by having such lovely herbs and fresh tomatoes to make foodstuffs worthy of them. I've been using the thyme in soup stocks. I made herb stuffing for a couple of chickens with the thyme, sage and rosemary. I've used the basil in pasta sauce.
And I've been making pizzas. This has really excited me, because it was the one simple food that eluded me. The doughs seemed too complex to be worth the trouble. I never liked the sauces. I couldn't get the crust thin enough to be like the ones I had in Cannes. This time around, I began with the dough. I decided to try one by a Cooking Channel star who lived in Italy. I figured that an everyday dough by a guy who lived there would be simple. And this one was. It was also delightfully chewy when baked and rolled as thin as I liked. It also kept for days in the fridge for my lunch or dinner needs. I made pizza Margarita. I made pizza cannibal (tomato sauce, cheese, finely ground beef and thinly sliced onions. That was my favorite pizza in Cannes. I also made a type of French onion pizza that is great with soup or a salad.
I've made the tomatoes into pickles along with jalepenos. I plan to make herb butter and flavored oils with them. And then there are salad dressings and marinades. I think I've just begun to figure out what can be done with them. I've been really enjoying the gardening itself. I even bought gardening gloves!
I want to talk about the incredible homemade meals I've been making and share photos on the social networks, but it seems that I make people hungry or fill them with longing or guilt. I certainly don't want to cause that. So I thought I'd share the love here where you expect to be tortured.
Month of Fun 2013
I have a lot of new people following the blog and my other social networks. Many have been confused by the references to the Month of Fun. Because of my challenges in life, I've been celebrating my birthday for an entire month of a number of years now. For that month, I try to follow the philosophy of Special Agent Dale Cooperfrom Twin Peaks and give myself a present every day. That present can be as small as a 'damned fine cup of coffee' or as large as a trip to France. The average gift tends to be lunch with a long missed friend or a bottle of bubbly. I am a five minute walk away from a beverage warehouse that contains all manner of wine, beers and liquors that I don't usually run across in the super market. I can get some real French bubbly for under $10. Presents needed be extravagantly priced to be valid for the Month of Fun. There should be no stress during that month. My wish list isn't too crazy. There are some books that I'd love to read, some restaurants I'd love to try. There are some long neglected procedures that I need to have like a mani-pedi and a facial. And there are some trinkets I'd like to have. To keep it simple and ever so modern, I've organized some of them on my Pinterest. Here's the link: http://pinterest.com/deborahlwarner/month-of-fun-2013/. Most of these little 'pins' have info on the place, so you can check it out if you'd like. It's been a really stressful winter and spring. I look forward to a month of great food, conversation, exploration and revelations!

Critiquing the Critics
On many occasions, I have repeatedly witnessed this situation. Newly published author is over the moon that the tome they worked on so hard is live. Within a day or two or even a week, they are posting to their supporters that an inexplicable review had popped up on Amazon or Goodreads or where ever. The critic has been generally kind to the story with some reservations and nit picks. Still, they give the title only one star! Now, either the reviewer didn't know that the one star designation that doesn't match the review is devastating to an author. They would expect one star rating if the review was ripped them apart limb from limb. This is different. It seems to the author that the reader liked the book, but because it wasn't perfect they get one star. It seems spiteful and mean. And for writers that are wound really tight to begin with, this sort of mixed signal can derail them from writing for as long as weeks or even months. It's not being melodramatic. A one star review really hurts sales and makes achieving a high overall rating extremely difficult. Don't get me wrong, writers want reviews of our books. We are often desperate for reviews of our books. We are hugely grateful for reviews of books. We just ask that reviewers carefully consider something like a rating system. Make sure the rating matches the review. I also might add, read the book before reviewing or rating. Yes, I'm still bitter about that. How can you review something that has been on sale for TEN minutes??!!! It sure wasn't actually read first. There were no recorded sales, and I hadn't given out advanced copies. Deep breath. And say, you find a book that is really cool but riddled with problems. Contact the author. Sometimes you'll find that the wrong file was uploaded and that the author and publisher are deeply grateful that the error was caught before too many copies were sold. Sometimes, you are so grateful to this kind soul that you have them look over text before uploading as they have a great eye and a fast turn around. Such a kind act could result in a great friendship with a really cool, vastly read person. I'm not giving away any names like Yvonne or anything. I'm just saying to not be so quick to cut down an indie author – if you see something good in their work. If their really bad, let them know that as well. Just be a very thoughtful critic. We really do appreciate it.

There is a lot coming aside from the month of fun.
Stay tuned.

PMP Marathon Walk -- Team LA's Report

Each number matches the team member.One of the most positive things that came out of my illness was finding an amazing group of PMP Cancer patients, caregivers and survivors simply called Pmp Cancer Survivors Group. They are and 800 plus strong group that shares stories, gives support and information to patients and their caregivers. Whenever I have an odd symptom, I find someone in the group who has had it and has a solution. Before this group, I would panic over things that were normal for someone who has had my illness and treatment. They also bolster each other mentally and emotionally. It is beyond wonderful to have a group of people to talk to who have walked in my shoes. They are there for Jon as well. If this wasn't enough, the group has members who've started charities to raise awareness or to help fund research or help patients. One such group is Pseudomyxoma Survivor http://www.pseudomyxomasurvivor.co.uk/. Today, one of our group will run in the London Marathon to help raise money and awareness for the charity. There is so little in the way of aid for this cancer every little bit truly helps. To help support the group, Jon, Ohio buddy Bruce Kline, the infamous Craig and I have been doming our own marathons to raise money. Every week we log those miles. This past Friday, we passed 53 miles or two marathons. We were hoping that in doing this, Julie wouldn't be running alone.
  
See all our photos here:  http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_21.html

I thought of it as running a marathon on the layaway plan. I do at least 3 miles per errand and at lest 4
errands a week. The miles add up quickly. Jon walks two miles per day as part of his commute to work, and then we do 3 or more on the weekends. We decided to finish our second marathon circuit walking from Marina del Rey to Venice Circle on Venice Beach. It was a 4 mile stretch to cap off a week of walking every day. Though it probably wasn't smart for me to do after a week that included planting a community garden. I really wanted to do as much as the rest of the team did last week.

 Bruce Kline does his walking during disc golf  when not relaying traffic reports for his Columbus radio station. He does 3 to 4 miles each course and typically does a couple courses a week. Bruce and I have been friends since the 1980s when we both worked in Manhattan. He was an aspiring musician and radio DJ. I was trying to peddle my writing. Currently, he is a musician in his home town of Columbus, Ohio where he is an on-air radio personality. He also writes music for some of our film ventures.

And then there's Craig. He runs up mountains for fun. He was the only marathon runner. He did his part in big jags. During the second circuit, he nearly got 'swatted' by an  LAPD SWAT team investigating can urgent call at singer Rhianna's estate. And last week, he ran a half marathon run on behalf of the fallen at the Boston Marathon. I've worked with Craig in our day jobs off and on the entire time we've lived in LA. He is a gifted writer whose life seems to be out of any Coen Brothers movie. He's never been an actor, but he is one of the most entertaining people I know. He also looked after me when I was at my sickest by taking me to and from appointments and making my sides split with laughter. What we did wasn't a lot in the face of the terrible toll this cancer takes, but we had to do something. I'm very proud of the team and the team is proud to be part of this incredible effort.
runner among us.

Manic Mondays, Anais Nin and Modern Manners

Saw him on TV while at the Hospital. Wanted to share.Today, I will actually talk about writing as well as my really crazy life of late. The writing part will cover the  price of pursuing certain genres over others. One part of my musings on reviews will have me drifting into the subject of internet etiquette and the crazy mind field that can sometimes create. And for my long time readers and supporters, I have a major announcement about my books that is three years in the making!
As always, check out this blog's photos here: http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_15.html.
I never used to be affected by Mondays. I think that may be because I've had so many jobs that ignored calendars and holidays. It was often a treat to have a gig that respected weekends off. The last three Mondays have been really, truly horrible for me. I've found myself so stressed and mournful on those days that I have thought some shockingly dark thoughts. This last one had me absolutely furious at almost every man that I know. I had become really convinced that I had lost the ability to communicate with them entirely. I was also convinced that I didn't want to deal with any of them anymore for any reason. I don't know if anyone of my gentle readers have noticed, but I don't get angry very often. When I do, I get furious on a volcanic level. This past Monday began with a terrible night's sleep. My biopsy left me swollen and in a lot of pain. I called the number given for such instances and was told to report to radiology immediately. That meant a 90 minute to 3 hour trip on public transit – one way. I really didn't want to go, but there was a chance of infection or internal bleeding. Yay! Fortunately, I was seen right away (I thought I'd be there for hours), and there were no serious problems. On the way home, I got to chat with Marie for a lovely while and pick up some duck fat. Cue evil laughter – more on that later.
The Beat Goes On
The two biopsies and the problems I had afterward, put me behind on a number of obligations. I was given lip service about my physical and emotional woes, but the show must go on. I was still expected to meet my various deadlines. It's not really cold blooded. Even the smallest productions can't stop once they got started. Thus, I had the added stress of worrying about my inbox. At this writing, I've finished scheduling a script for a film I can't talk about, and the latest manga is in the final stages before we put it to bed. I'm working on my fiction, a short story for one publication and an essay for another. And the biggest news, all four of my yaoi novels have been picked up by a major distributor. I'm not allowed to talk about the details on that either save to say that I've been working on this company for three years. That more than made up for Monday.
Anais Nin and the Burdens of Erotica
It shouldn't be a surprise that two women who start a publishing concern called Sybaritic Press. She is an inspiration for me and sort of a role model for how I view my career as a fiction writer. Here's the call:
Sybaritic Press (www.sybpress.com) is going to publish an ebook anthology of writing and artwork inspired by/in tribute to Anais Nin, one of the 20th century's greatest writers/diarists/literary icons. It can be a poem, a short story, a photograph, am illustration; something that speaks to the kind of writer she was, what she stood for, or, how she inspired you.

For more details, go to: https://www.facebook.com/events/231796243625493/


I didn't choose to be classified as an erotica writer. That's basically the mantle chosen for me, because of the sexual content in all of my fiction. I'm not sure why I need a label. Sex fuels drama. The quest for it; the obsession with it; or the loss of it is at the heart of nearly any kind of story that happens between or among people. I am more honest about it than most, I suppose. And because of that, and the need to protect tender sensibilities, my work is shunted into a niche. It's easy to be dismissive or derisive of fiction in a niche. It is said that more bad writing turns up in niches. I've read a lot of lit in grad school. I say a lot of bad writing can be found anywhere. And I say I work as hard on my plots and my characters and their arcs as any other writer I know. And I'm pretty good, If I do says so. My fans who are often looking for all things torrid yell at me for making them enjoy hanging out with a circle of elderly ladies discussing local gossip. I make them worry about a houseman when they should be thinking about my beautiful couple doing sweaty things. I tell a whole story even about sexual escapades. My essay will be about the toll of that effort. While it will be a deeply sensual experience, I plan to make a lot of people uncomfortable. This should be fun.


Modern Manners


Facebook is often mocked for being a huge waste of time. I'm sure for some people, that is the case. For me, it has become a way to keep up with many, many people I wouldn't normally have time to chat with on the phone. Everyone has their own busy schedules. It's nice to have a post or two to keep up with friends and family at places other than funerals. My activities on Facebook have really taken my writing career a long way. I've gotten published because of it. I am an editor because of it. The problem with this service and all of the other smart devices we have now to support it is that there is no such thing as being out of communication range for more than a few hours. Now, etiquette is designed to make everyone feel more comfortable. All this personal communication tends to make everyone a lot less formal. It may be because of all the temp jobs I've had during the rise of the internet in which I was taught during orientations that email and later texts can be used as a paper trail in everything from a report to a supervisor to a court case. Our long time attorney taught Jon and I to document all of our meetings in follow up emails that have been very handy in preventing us from getting truly ripped off. I take these forms of communication as seriously as I would a registered letter.


For the past two weeks or more, I have had trouble getting a response to emails, text messages, and even voicemails trying to advance various projects. All of the recipients were different and each is attached to projects that are vastly different from one another. It's shocking that these people would have anything in common at all. But they did. They were all ignoring my attempts to get information to advance these projects. And while they seemed to lack the few seconds of time it would take to respond with a no, not yet, not enough information, not at this time or even get lost, I could see them on Facebook or Twitter posting about all sorts of things. Because this was so pervasive at that time, I got very hurt and then I got really furious. The lack of forward momentum would be blamed on me as I was the public face on these projects. Beyond that, ignoring the messages was just old-fashioned rude like not answering someone at the door when that visitor can clearly see that you are home. Fortunately for the sake of the projects and some friendships, no one dared to say my reaction was silly. No one likes being ignored. I have made it clear that the next time it happens, I'll be posting some embarrassing things on their pages for all of their friends and followers to see. I can do rude when pushed. It's ain't wise to push me.


Updates
I've been giving them throughout this blog. I will have a mini-blog later this week about the PMP Cancer Marathon my team and I have been working on for months. Also, the double edged sword of seeking reader reviews of books.


Stay tuned.

Week of Woes, Window Greenery and Updates

I mentioned a Maserati in my last blog and was soon being followed by a dealership on my social media accounts. Who knows where that may lead? In the hopes of tapping into luxuries through my blog, I will now mention the places I want to visit or things I really want to possess. For places, I'll take (in no particular order but with deluxe travel and accommodations): Paris, Provence, Vancouver, Philadelphia, Atlanta, Rome, Tuscany, Tokyo, Kyoto, Madrid, Barcelona and Washington, D.C. For things I'd like a house with a serious kitchen and a nice sized yard, a second car (Maseratis aren't a good idea for Costco), any cooking implement and foodstuff I desire. That should cover it for now. I'll let you know if the Google gods fill my wish list.
Spring may be off to a slow start in most of the US, but it has sprung in my apartment. The window box herbs are growing like crazy. The tomato plants are getting big, but are just now producing. It's kind of nice to have all this going on in the tiny apartment. I got to use the thyme in my soup stocks this week. I'm also experimenting with pizzas. I'll be pickling the tomatoes this weekend to make another sweet sauce for the soup dumplings. Speaking of pickles, I made a very successful jar of garlic dill pickles. I can't call them Kosher dills, because my kitchen isn't Kosher. But they are really yummy!
You can check out the photos from the last couple of weeks here: http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_27.html




Mopy Monday
Last week was probably one of the worst I've had since my diagnosis. Monday began with terrible news from some of the members of my cancer support group. And then a dear friend with an entirely different kind of cancer got some disheartening news about her annual tests. All of this happened before I could make breakfast, and I had gotten up at 6am with Jon. And then, I read the article: My Amazon Bestseller Made Me Nothinghttp://www.salon.com/2013/03/15/hey_amazon_wheres_my_money/sent me into a horrible depressive tailspin. There is nothing like more evidence that everything you're doing creatively is likely a waste of time. That actually happens to me fairly often. Most times, I shake it off and move on. I've tried what we call the 'civilian life.' No offense, but I would end up with headaches each afternoon and thinking bizarre and destructive thoughts. Most days though, I didn't have a breast biopsy waiting for me. I was left feeling raw. I'm usually able to focus on the positives (and there are a lot of those). But it was almost too much to cope with.
Woeful Wednesday
But I showed up bright and early Wednesday with what I hoped was a positive attitude. The one thing I had hoped to leave with that day was some answers. I had reports from other patients who'd had biopsies that I should know something that same day. I really can't stand being in limbo. I especially can't stand it when I have so many other things to stress me out in life. This blog is seeing a fraction of the goings on behind the scenes with me. Today, I thought I'd stick with the stuff that has me in or near tears most often of late. The nice administrator who went over my consent form dashed all hope of leaving limbo. She said that I wouldn't get results until my next oncology appointment – in June. I assume that she noticed how distraught that bit of news made me, because she quickly explained that the areas they were investigating were of 'low suspicion' and this was all simply a precaution. This may have been all well and good for most patients, but this one is still trying to recover from the damage inflicted upon me by precautions. I had few problems after the HIPEC surgery. My current pain and mobility issues stem from chemo damage. Needless to say I remain leery of precautions.
My tech for the biopsy was the same as from the mammogram. That was heartening. I liked her and found her to be very professional. Still, I was given more reason for being off put when I saw the machine, I noticed there was a set of plates for more breast smashing. I wasn't sure how that was supposed to with the needles. And then I almost fell off the stairs meant to make getting on the table easier. I nearly fell through the various openings in the table. I had to grossly contort my neck and one leg to get in the best position for the imaging to show clearly. I had to hold that position for over an hour. It was painful and made me panic when it became difficult to breathe. But what makes this even more special is that I have to do it again in two weeks. They only did one side. The radiologist explained that patients often can't handle doing both sides at one appointment. You think? I had not been told that at all when the biopsy was initially scheduled. I also wasn't told how long I could be out of commission afterward. I was wrapped tightly in a pair of wide tenser bandages that made movement difficult. And the restrictions covered everything that I'm able to do save for reading and writing. I was down physically for two days. Emotionally, this has felt like a tailspin. Needless to say, I'll be really glad when this set of tests are over though I was told that I should expect more frequent mammograms and/or biopsies for years to come. I'm not ungrateful to have thorough medical care, but I'm really getting while some patients get very tired of it all.

Writing Updates
I'm still editing manga and working on a couple of film projects. As for fiction, I've actually gotten into a good rhythm with the next Soldiers book. I'm planning on publishing that in May or June. I'm also going to do some short fiction based on my Yaoi characters that will be posted on the yaoi blog. I'm experimenting with illustrating those pieces to see if I can broaden my audience. Meanwhile, I have some other works that have sprung up from who knows where. I'll share more about those later.
Stay tuned.

Herbs and Stress and the Maserati

When I started writing this blog two weekends back, the really big news was the new window box garden and the Maserati. There was a Maserati in the parking lot of the garden center. I'm not sure if they had the space for boxes of plants and large sacks of soil or fertilizer. I'm pretty sure the place delivers. We were surprised that the car was there. Not that people in the area couldn't afford a six figure sports car. We were a five minute walk from the yacht club were boats have helipads. The wealthy people are usually in the marina or in the insanely priced condos. I suppose it could have come from one of the many McMansions that populate the area. All that was certain was that Jon and I were walking our purchases home in our four wheeled granny cart. No worries about soil stains. I spent a couple hours after that transferring the plants into the window boxes. I was pleased to see that the two tomato plants already had flowers about to bloom. I'm happy to report that tomatoes are already growing. The weekend was to be laid back as I had an arduous week of medical tests. Not that the tests are hard. It's just a lot of commuting and lack of sleep, because I'm an Olympic class worrier. My plan was to be well rested and as calm as possible.

More photos from this blog can be found on this link:  http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_11.html .
MaseratiYet by mid-day that Sunday, Jon and I were in the ER at UCLA Santa Monica. It wasn't me this time. It was Jon who was in sudden an excruciating pain. I was silly thinking that I could write the blogs while I was there. It was impossible to focus on anything other than the Skymall magazine inexplicably in the waiting room. I really love those things. I look at them every time I fly though I'd never actually buy anything from them. We were lucky that despite the very crowed ER, that Jon got seen fairly quickly and they soon knew what the issue was. It was a kidney stone. Jon had had one before. We were back home within six hours. To say it was a relief is beyond understatement. I was certain that pain that severe meant surgery was in the offing. I was thinking all sorts of dire things including dragging IV poles down a hospital corridor together. I said I was a big worrier. I also felt guilty that perhaps being my caregiver had been too much stress for him physically. Being a caregiver takes a toll. I had been trying to get Jon to have a physical for a while to make sure he was okay. I was very guilty about not having pushed hard enough. I feel guilty about Jon just about every other day. This was the worst ever. I think the relief left me exhausted for most of the week. However, my work load does not allow for any lazying about.
Blog Blogs Blogs
I've become a serial blogger. Despite my very deep misgivings, there is now a blog for almost every aspect of my life. There will NOT be one for the food thing. I'm not planning on going pro on that, so I don't need anyone doing internet searches for me and food. That is the reason there is a separate blog for each professional thing I do. It makes it easy for people interested in the books or the films to find me on a dedicated blog with a title for that industry. Those other blogs rarely shed any light on my personal life. They are all business. I keep them all funny, but they are all business. And I am obligated to write them at predictable intervals. The Demonspawn blog is now a perk for those who donated to the film funding campaign. The Yaoi blog is part of the reason why I was hired as an editor at Digital Manga. They were looking for people with a presence in Yaoi related social networks. Blogging about the manga is as important as editing the manga. On top of all of that, I have a Facebook page that is a news agregator for all things Yaoi. I have to update it every day at least three times a day. That's why it seems like I'm always on Facebook. I am of late. But it's business. That's how my poor flagship blog got pushed to one side. Have I mentioned that my schedule got trampled in this mess of the past two weeks? I'm not giving up though. No way. There is a way to make these facets of my life play nicely together. I will find it!
UpdatesThis sounds crazy with all that I have on my plate. I will concede that. However, even though I'm just now getting back on track with my latest Soldiers novel and a long overdue short story, I have been pulled by little snippets of story that I can't see being part of a novel. These snippets involve characters from the Soldiers universe and the Ensnared universe. I've decided to start writing and illustrating the snippets to post on the yaoi blog. I'd forgotten that I used to write such things – generally fanfiction – when I had a block on my novels or scripts. Strangely, they may help me write the longer pieces faster. I think the snippets may attract new readers as well. And I can compile them and sell them at some point.
Stay tuned.

Crazy Busy, Major Film Update & Crazy Good Eats

At A-Frame, a hot spot in our neighborhood. See Below.It's been a while since the last blog. Part of the reason why is my crazy life. Part of the reason is I wanted to make sure everyone read the last one: http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/2013/02/recipe-fusion-collard-pot-liquor.html. I'm happy to say that it's the most widely read one I've had! But I am crazy busy. I have to have a schedule once again. I haven't had once since I was on chemotherapy. Then, I had at least two major medical appointments a week along with a few minor procedures or administrative things. I still have a date book for the sprinkling of appointments I have now. But it isn't nearly as filled up and complicated as it was years ago.
Now, I am juggling a lot of projects with various deadlines and different time lines that are part of building my career. On top of that, there are things that I'd like to do or need to do for reasons other than money like cooking and learning Japanese and recently drawing. I find that if I set up a schedule that I will make a real effort to get something significant done in a given day in each category. The schedule is brand spanking new, but I'm already feeling better about what I am or am not getting done. What does that mean? I would often feel crestfallen at the end of a day, because I had not accomplished one goal. Somehow, I would ignore all the things that I had managed to do in the same amount of time. It's silly, I know. It seems like a big pile demanding attention. Anyway, the schedule forces me to note what has been done and where I am in the overall time line. Having a handle on the big picture makes me relax about the days when I just have to veg and just read (the reading is now on the schedule). I'm still having some physical.
Unscheduled Break
I was sidelined from the blog and a lot of what I was trying to get done yesterday by a whole lot of unexpected pain. It's called break trough pain in that it breaks trough the regular meds. This felt worse than a typical break through. I did not have a good Wednesday. Thursday found me considering a trip to the closest ER. That was horribly depressing. A few calls to the various specialist that interact with me found an answer. I felt well enough to make a big leap in progress with the Secret Cancer Documentary today. I even got a few things on my schedule done. It was a bit more distressing than a hiccup in my life, but I managed to shove things back on track. So, I do believe that I'll be able to finish a good bit of what was on my plate for this week. That said, I know I won't get any more of this blog written before the weekend. Note: It is now Sunday, so that prediction was really on the money.
Measuring Progress
The biggest thing I needed to get done this week was the proof of concept trailer for The Secret Cancer. I filmed it in November. Admittedly, that was not a great time of year. I had one major convention behind me and another one ahead. I had a pile of manga to edit. Then, there were the holidays and all the baking and general craziness. It seems that I blinked and it was February. We had been working on the video here and there. We had a major audio problem. The entire audio file was corrupted and thus useless. The camera sound had a lot of pops and other noises in it. I debated for a long time about how to salvage everything. Jon processed the camera sound until it was much more useable. I decided to cut the interview down to just the story about Audrey Hepburn's diagnosis and the aftermath. It was so powerful in that quiet, cultured voice. I used some images from the book about Ms Hepburn's life and her passing, Audrey Hepburn: An Elegant Spirit. I plan to use more with the family's permission. Here is the rough cut. If you comment, please keep in mind that we are almost painfully aware of the technical difficulties. http://youtu.be/VLygvc5Flpg
The next thing I needed to make progress on that had been bothering me for months was the wall I had hit on my current Soldiers book, A Soldier's Destiny. It wasn't even anything like a writer's block. I was just getting busier and busier with other kinds of creative work. There were and are essays and short stories and editing. There is the blogging and writing reviews. I don't regret any of the extra activity, but I missed my Soldiers, and there were and are readers waiting for it. Thus, my number one must do on each day of my new schedule is work on that Solder's book. I am not only six pages from where I was, the spark of life in the characters has returned. They made me laugh the other day. I was so happy to have found my way back to those characters. I really appreciate the very patient fans who have hung in there and occasionally prodded me along.
Food Geek Out
I don't know if you all look at my food reviews on Yelp.com, but this was a mini blog of sorts about a famous restaurant in our neighborhood. The chef is not only famous, he is an author on Anthony Bourdain's new imprint. And now, for reasons I do not understand, we are friends on the internet. I don't just mean I follow his posts. He follows mine and has corresponded with me!!! Check out Roy Choi: http://www.foodandwine.com/best_new_chefs/roy-choi
Here's my crazy review of his restaurant : A-Frame:
I am lucky enough to be a neighbor of this restaurant. I literally pass it once a week running errands. I finally had a chance to stop in to celebrate with a friend. I was immediately impressed by the stripped down but stylish decor. The bar was filled with bottles of fresh squeezed juices. The bartender was shaking two drinks at once. How could I not have a fancy cocktail? The Southern sour was delicious and not too strong or heavy. We all went for the buttermilk fried chicken and the table pickles. The first time super hot chef,  Roy Choi, popped over to our table, I thought he knew I was back engineering the incredibly crunchy and savory crust on that super moist chicken. The second time, I think he knew I was also trying to figure out what was in the dipping sauce for those insanely good pickles. How can lightly pickled veggies taste that good? I was having a foodie geek out, because I so admire Choi for his fusion of food cultures that I had begun making my own high fusion concept recipes. Could it be that he knew of my blog about collard pot liquor soup dumplings? My lunch partners brought me down to earth quickly with an eye roll and a sigh. The place was slammed. He was likely just making sure everyone was happy with the food and service. Then, I got all jazzed about that as well. I thought the hot, happening chef caring about his guests enough to check on them himself was the stuff of food TV. The upshot is that the food and cocktails and beer were everything I had been told they'd be, and the service was stellar.
I am so getting that recipe blog to him!
Stay tuned!

Recipe Fusion -- Collard Pot Liquor Dumplings

This is my version of a Soup Dumpling with Pot LiquorWhen last we met, I was hard at work on a complex recipe that was a fusion of Chinese dim sum and a staple of southern food. Nothing in this dish can be called Asian cuisine. It is the method that is the fusion.
The joy of a Xiaolongbao or soupdumplingis that when it is eaten, delicious, hot soup floods the mouth along with the filling. The stock is very slowly cooked from bones so that it is gelatinous when chilled. The filling along with a cube of gelled stock is placed on the dumpling dough and gently wrapped with it. When the dumpling is steamed, the stock melts and mingles with the filling. Additionally there is a sauce that further enhances the eating experience.
Properly gelatinous pot liquor.I had decided that a well made spoonful of greens with the pot liquor and a sliver of the smoked turkey wing it was cooked with would be a great single spoonful example of how I cook. I realized while Anthony Bourdain was having a foodgasm over a soup dumpling while visiting Taipei that I could wrap that spoonful of food in a dumpling and that would be awesome. Further, that dumpling would be made from the same rolled dough recipe from Southern Chicken and Dumplings. That way, the dish is entirely Southern with an international spin.
It's been taking me a while to get to the point of assembling everything, because of my physical limitations. I also had to shop for some equipment and supplies over a period of time. I've done a photo blog of sorts with the three major steps of putting together the dumplings. One step I didn't bother with detailing since I used an existing recipe save for one extra ingredient. I have a link to each of the photo blog at the top of each section.
Part One – Poultry Stock
http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_7.htmlPhoto Blog Part One
I say poultry stock because it can be either chicken or turkey or both, as I did here. I used raw turkey wings (as opposed to smoked) and chicken feet. Chicken feet makes for a very gelatinous stock even though the little feet do freak me out a little. The rest of the ingredients are vegetables like onions, carrots, celery and garlic along with thyme, peppercorns and bay leaf. After roasting the poultry for about 45 minutes to an hour (skin should be golden), chuck them into a big, deep stock pot with the vegetables and other stuff. Cover everything with water. Use a plate to make sure all the ingredients stay submerged. Cover and bring to just before a boil. Turn down to a low simmer and let it go for 4 to 6 hours. Cool to room temperature then strain. The stock can be used at that point or refrigerated. Freeze if it is going to be sitting around for more than three days.

Part Two – Collard Greens
http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_7478.html  Photo Blog Part Two – Braised Collards

It's hard to give amounts, because the bunches are different sizes depending upon whether or not the leaves are baby or big. I generally do 3 to 4 bunches to one smoked turkey wing. I did two wings to have more smoked meat for the filling. First you trim the leaves of big stems (if they are big leaves). Then, slice them into thin-ish strips. I like them thin to eat and they are better for the filling. Then, soaked them in a deep sink or gigantic bowl of cold water. Rinse and drain them. While they drain, slice the large onion into thin slices. Saute the onion in a large, heavy pot in a couple tablespoons of oil. I use olive oil, but vegetable oil works. Add the garlic. I use a whole head of roasted garlic. If it's raw, use three cloves that are mince finely. When the onion softens a little, add two cups of stock and the turkey wing(s). Simmer in the pot with a lid on it for 30 minutes. Add the greens. I simmer them until they are very, very tender – about 90 minutes. That's me. I like them that way, and they work for the filling. Separate the greens from the liquid and the wings. Put them in containers and refrigerate. If the pot liquor is successful, it can be cut into cubes.

Part Three – Dumpling Dough
I wanted this dish to be truly Southern, so the dough recipe is from a chicken and dumpling dough. That goes very well with the poultry based pot liquor. I Googled rolled chicken and dumplings. The recipes were pretty much the same. The only thing I did differently was add two teaspoons of thyme to the dough, because the chicken and dumplings I had as a child contained thyme. I rested the dough for 30 minutes before rolling it out. I rolled the dough to 1/8 of an inch or thinner and cut them into squares. I didn't have a biscuit cutter, and I am not good at making dumpling pleats. I chilled the squares for 30 minutes before assembling. Wonton wrappers will work fine instead of dumplings.
Part Four – Assembling
http://dlwarner.blogspot.com/p/blog-page_8245.html– Photo Blog Assembly
Stage the ingredients as the photos show. Keep the dough squares chilled until you are ready to assemble everything. The it's turkey first. I used smoked turkey breast I bought online as well as the turkey wings I cooked with the greens. Use only about a teaspoon. I think shredding will work better than the block I used. Next, is a teaspoon of greens. Finally, a two teaspoon block of pot liquor. It must be chilled to work! Quickly wet the edges of the dough with a brush or a finger and pinch the edges together. I placed the finished dumpling on squares of parchment paper in the steamer. Steam for 10 minutes.
Sauce
The idea for the sauce came from my father. He liked hot pickled peppers and a little of the pickling liquid in his greens. He's also sometimes slice tomatoes into his greens. So, I did a pickled hot pepper sauce and a Japanese pickled tomato with rice wine vinegar that was sweet. Just Google Quick pickled peppers and quick pickled cherry tomatoes repectively for recipes. They are all similar.
The ResultThe pot liquor melts during the steaming, so there is a lovely mouthful of that with the greens and the smoked turkey. The dumpling with the vinegar sauce makes it taste like a whole bowl of comfort food in one bite. It is extraordinary! So far, the dumplings still steam beautifully after two days of hanging out in the fridge. I really want to entertain with them to get some other opinions.
My first, completely original idea for a dish! I am beyond jazzed.
More updates on my writing and other things next time.
Stay Tuned.

Happy Hours, Bites of Life and Updates

It's been almost a year since I desperately needed a break from the four walls of my apartment and sought out the Culver City Farmers Market. It was a spur of the moment decision that has had enormous impact on our lives. I can say that most of our produce is not purchased at that farmers market or another. I've been serving a lot more fresh fruit and cooking a lot more veggies. I am certain that those changes are why I had dropped a nice bit of weight before my last visit to the oncologist. The weight loss was a delightful surprise, because I did not practice moderation of any sort during the holidays. Oh my, no. I was eating everything in sight that was bad. But the good food and the walking staved off a weight gain and helped me lose some. I've really enjoyed just getting out around people and watching the children at the market. The outings got even better when Marie began joining me. I had been missing my friends during my very long recovery. While I am very grateful to have networks like Facebook to keep in some contact with civilization, there is nothing like a face to face conversation. I'm certain that aside from strengthening a great friendship, the Farmers Market outings helped jump start Sybaritic Press. The martinis may have had a small role in that as well. We each have stressful lives. It is lovely to get together and shop and let our wonderful bartender and the staff at the Culver Hotel pamper us for a couple of hours. I really miss the uber cute porter who used to kneel to serve us, but what can you do. He may be on his way to being a movie star. Yes, he was that uber cute.
Life in a Bite – Part One
I was very excited to see two of my favorite food related celebs, Anthony Bourdain and Nigella Lawson, were in a new show together. The Taste   is a competition show in which the contestants must make the perfect single bite of a dish. I'd seen similar challenges in other competition shows like Chopped or the Next Iron Chef where it is asked that the chef demonstrate their cooking philosophy in a single bite of food. I will say right now that I am not interested in a food competition of any kind. I am wide eyed and hopeful or arrogant enough to believe that I can get to cook for those chefs I admire without the trauma and potential humiliation of a competition. Still, I became obsessed with my cooking philosophy (do I have one) and whether it could be expressed in a single bite. Jon had an eating philosophy of a bit of croissant with butter and honey on a spoon. I thought of something that would have a bit of complexity. It would be a recipe that I had mutated and fused with other cooking cultures I've explored. It should be something that means a lot to me personally.
I had an idea that would work reasonably well, but it seemed to be too simple. And then, I saw Bourdain on an episode of his newer travel show, The Layover. And there I found the missing elements. I figured out an original recipe that was very much from my roots while reflecting all of the methods of cooking I'd learned from other cultures. I even involved my father in its creation. He's been very much pro-cultural fusion in cooking since I gave him beef short ribs Boeuf Bourguignon style. And he helped me with that final element that really shows some creativity. I am mid-way through executing the recipe for the first time, so I can't reveal much more. I hate to be a tease, but I want to pull this off before I really start crowing about how clever I may be. What I wanted to talk about today is how absolutely giddy I felt figuring out an original recipe. There are many recipes that I've put a spin on, but this one is made of groupings of ingredients and procedures that are my own. It is writing of a sort. Chefs have said over an over that cooking can be storytelling. One element of this epic bite of food is collard greens. Each time I make them, I think about my grand uncle KC and how he taught me how to cut the leaves. Of course, thinking about him involves tomes of some highly entertaining Warner family history. Or I think about how my version of collards was a direct result of my Mother's stroke at age 46. In the aftermath, I took my immediate family through a tectonic shift in how the traditional foods were prepared. I started using olive oil, garlic and smoked turkey to flavor veg like collards or black eyed peas. This dish is definitely the story of a world traveler who has wandered mostly through foods of different places and peoples. This excitement is the same as that of writing a story when it's going very well. I wanted to share. The next blog will have full documentation of how I made the dish and how it turned out. There may even be a video. It's my plan to make sure that the chefs I kibitz with on Facebook and twitter have a read.
UpdatesJon and I begin our marathon journey this weekend. Remember, we take any donation. It's for the entire walk as a unit – not per mile. Donations go directly to the organization. https://www.justgiving.com/Deborah-Warner. I should have the interview with Sean Hepburn Ferrer done by next weekend. I'll also have a couple of cooking videos aside from the one bite up next weekend. And I am really, really hoping for the safety of everyone near me that I can find the time to write some fiction.
Stay tuned.