Problem Child Quotes

“We can’t control what people think or do, only our reactions.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“There was ice on everything. It was—beautiful and really fucking irritating.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“This was just the crappy cherry on the shit sundae.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“For my baby sister, nothing is too much.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“I’m really fucking over people grabbing and kissing me like it’s their right. Keep your hands and your lips to yourself.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“A smile flashed across his face and I shook my head. Pod people. They were all pod people.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Okay. That was it, someone had kidnapped the douchebags and replaced them with pod people.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“We love you,” Yvette reminded me. “Even if you think endorphin dumping via running is a good idea.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Comfort and music. You couldn't go wrong with those.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“We might have thrown in some Taylor Swift, but who didn’t love her? Well, I could think of a few but they could get fucked regardless.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Aubrey just smiled and held up a small bottle of pepper spray. “Hoes before bros.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Dad could dick as many women in a night as he wanted and be lauded for it. Mom had any kind of a breakdown and she would be crucified. Hollywood was not as forgiving as it used to be.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Tired KC was not as effective as rested KC. But caffeinated KC was going to win dammit. A girl could do a lot with coffee and determination.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Discretion was a talent worth its weight in gold.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“You live on espresso, lyrics, and long-distance running”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Music really was my happy place.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Live hard, die young, and leave a beautiful corpse.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Roadies were the backbone of a successful concert tour.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“I’m not taking one thing more than I absolutely need to. I’ll be here, we’ll party, we’ll hang out, and I will absolutely cheer you on, but me and academia do better if we’re friends and not trying to be hate lovers, you know?” I adored her.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“Bronson was one of the members of our exclusive “We Could Have Been in a Condom” club, our family chat for all of Dad’s spawn.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“How we see someone is more about our own truth than it is about facts.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child

“All of life was a stage, and we were but the actors on it—or however the Shakespeare quote went.”
― Heather Long, Problem Child