Funny Feelings Quotes

“Well, how interesting. Men are afraid of women being funnier than them, and women are afraid of, oh, I don’t know, being oppressed, beaten, raped, or killed by men. But look out! Funny chick here might follow you down an alley and make you chuckle without consent!”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“This book is dedicated to all the women who’ve ever been told that they’re Too Much.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“Sushi arrives, and it’s not until halfway through the meal that I notice him using his fork to eat instead of the chopsticks. It’s also when I notice that he uses that fork with his opposite hand, so he can keep hold of mine with the other.  It’s the best lunch of my life.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I got the tattoo because I wanted to remember that feeling that you gave me the first time I met you. When you burst inside and demanded to make a connection. I wanted to remember to not be afraid of that, anymore. Even if it doesn’t look the same for everyone. Even if some people speak with their hands, some use a mic, or art, whatever. You did it with your friendship with us.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“This book is dedicated to all the women who’ve ever been told that they’re Too Much. Maybe you’re too loud, too crass, too open, too bawdy. You overshare too often, say too many bad words, you’re too weird, or too emotional. To the women who, in their quiet moments, still think back on their social interactions and wonder if they really are too much, if they should feel embarrassed, or ashamed. You are fucking incredible. You are my people. Don’t you dare dilute yourselves to make yourselves more palatable. You are all heart and fire.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“If love is the treasure, laughter is the key.Yakov Smirnoff”
― Tarah DeWitt, Funny Feelings

“I've got you. Always.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“If someone’s carrying your heart, shouldn’t you do them the courtesy of warning them? Like catching someone driving with a mug on top of their car. Hey, there! You probably need to stop, pull over and take care of that! At least slow down.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.” - Rodney Dangerfield”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I did. I think it goes without saying that while we’re doing this publicly, we uhhh, shouldn’t be dating other people.” “Aw. I’ll break the news to my harem.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I don’t know what I believe in as far as a higher power, Fee, but I know that I now believe that rainstorms always precede something amazing because you came into our lives on the tail end of one.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn't be funny, but to observe it, it's hilarious.” - Bill Burr”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I plan to savor this. You. And maybe I like the idea of making you wait for the rest.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“hot girls have tummy troubles.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“It’s almost an audible thing, really, the way my heart punches against the bones in my chest. It’s like the drum solo in that fucking Phil Collins song, it becomes so all-consuming.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is ending up with people who make you feel all alone.” —Robin Williams”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“He’s not my rock, he’s my hammock. He holds and cocoons me in the shade on a summer day.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“She chews a supremely large bite of her burger with a moan, eyes closed, balloon hat askew, cheese and sauce on her chin. That’s mine, I think. She’s mine.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“He sighs a little and looks over at me. “Humor me, Jones, and try not to start every sentence with some variation of ‘if this were real’. Because, fake girlfriend or not, I know you want something from each of them, and I’m all for sampling anything that sounds good right alongside you tonight.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I recognize that Dr. Deb and I need to continue patching up my mental umbrella, so that love and confidence comes from within, so that I can protect myself from the thoughts that want to surge and drown me. But these are my puddle people, the ones who will go splash around with me, even when I can't.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I was always going to have big feelings, and it was going to be up to me to make sure they were worth it. She told me I was going to have to learn to wear those feelings proudly, without doing damage to the things or people”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“There’s a Swiftie song for everyone.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness: a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say “no.” But saying “yes” begins things. Saying “yes” is how things grow. —STEPHEN COLBERT”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“This book is dedicated to all the women who’ve ever been told that they’re Too Much. Maybe you’re too loud, too crass, too open, too bawdy. You overshare too often, say too many bad words, you’re too weird, or too emotional. To the women who, in their quiet moments, still think back on their social interactions and wonder if they really are too much, if they should feel embarrassed, or ashamed. You are fucking incredible. You are my people. Don’t you dare dilute yourselves to make yourselves”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“I believe that jumping in puddles is better than any fancy party, and I believe that I’ll fight for your love, for the honor of loving you, every day, for the rest of our lives. Let me do that, Farley Jones, and I promise to make you the happiest woman for as long as you’ll have me.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“His head tilts and he snags my eyes with his again. “So, if you’re worried about me thinking about you in those terms, if you don’t think I find you painfully sexy, the kind of sexy that haunts and colors my every thought, you’re misinformed. You might be funny, but not even you are funny enough to distract me from all that, Fee.” And then he bends and leaves a peck on my open, dumbfounded mouth, before he pushes off the door and turns away, leaving me to go on speechless.”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the furthest thing from it. Because cynics don't learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness: a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say 'no.' But saying 'yes' begins things. Saying 'yes' is how things grow.” - Stephen Colbert”
― Tarah Dewitt, Funny Feelings

“Why did God make farts smell? So Deaf people can enjoy them too!”
― Tarah DeWitt, Funny Feelings

“isn’t that the dream? To have a heart that’s less burdened simply because of who you share it with?”
― Tarah DeWitt, Funny Feelings

“You didn’t want me to have the secrets, did you?” he teases, squinting at me. “You wanted me needy, begging for it, didn’t you? You’re high on power.”
― Tarah DeWitt, Funny Feelings