Just by Looking at Him Quotes

“Sometimes I think I surround myself with conflict so I have reasons to justify the sadness. That it’s circumstantial. That it doesn’t live deep in my bones.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“But the ultimate irony of being insecure is that you're consumed with your least favorite subject, yourself.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“I could’ve stayed like that forever: two boys in bed, giving themselves permission to be known.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“You could love someone and want to lose them at the same time.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“A complicated and risky life but a life that's mine to ruin as I see fit.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“I used to believe it was a privilege to be loved by anybody. Not anymore.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“My boyfriend Gus has a beautiful penis. It’s big and thick without being too big or too thick. It has the right number of pulsating veins when hard (the correct number is two). It’s not crooked or bent. It’s not purple or pink. It’s sun-dappled olive.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“going. All of your work inspires me, which should be illegal to say since we’re friends, but it’s true. Clifford Murray. In an industry full of scared little bitches, you’ve always supported me in making the gayest things. Thank you for believing in me when everyone else was too nervous to. My lawyer, Kim Jaime. You’re a real one. Thank you for being”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“I passed the donut shop from Tangerine that had been replaced by another donut shop. I remembered seeing the movie high on pills and falling asleep and lying to everyone afterward. “Wow, it was phenomenal. Game-changing, holy shit.” How shameful. But everyone’s secretly in a lot of pain, right? They are. They have to be. Existence is painful.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“I didn’t want to wonder what parts of myself I’d have to stifle so we could still make sense, so we could still have someone to watch TV with and know there’d always be someone to call the second something interesting happened to either of us.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“I’m realizing that so much of my existence was focused on outrunning what seemed to be a preordained fate of loneliness. Even on that first date with Gus, which ended up being genuinely amazing, I still couldn’t fully relax. I was still running.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“Sex is a way of announcing yourself. Of telling another person who you are. And that night I realized I had been presenting myself as someone I wasn't, and used sex as a way to escape my body rather than inhabit it. I rested my head on Jonas' chest and I peered up at him and told myself that if this stopped here, it would be enough. I had been on a hellish journey to be seen and validated by an army of inconsequential men. Tell me who I am. Tell me I am worthy. But it was over now. Or it could be over, because by allowing myself to see and accept Jonas, I was also seeing and accepting myself for the first time. He had given me the gift of finally being present in my body. I felt everything. Every stiff fucking muscle, every blemish, every crooked nook and it was beautiful. It was wrong to see my body as anything else. I looked at him and saw a future absent of distractions. Of pure unfiltered reality.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“The tobacco industry is an apt comparison to alcohol. Both are selling a lie perpetuated by capitalism. We've been led to believe that alcohol is an elixir, a social lubricant necessary to have fun and relieve anxiety.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“Not to sound straight edge and boring, but is being sober low key more fun than drinking?”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“I'm waiting for able bodied people to be like 'oops babe we fucked this one up, didn't we?' and feature us on magazine covers and give us ramps and meaningful employment and pass real legislation. It's wild to be ignored in a culture that currently has such a hard on for injustice. When the fuck will it be our turn?”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“It was a privilege to be loved by him, though. I really do believe that. I used to believe it was a privilege to be loved by anybody. Not anymore.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him

“Everything gets boring after a while. The sun eventually goes down, the Whole Foods closes, and suddenly you’re in a scary alleyway.”
― Ryan O'Connell, Just by Looking at Him