This Way Out Quotes

“Religion, colour, anatomy . . . It doesn’t matter compared to the quality of the person.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“This is my life now.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“The problem with every plot looking the same, though, is that, for visitors – loved ones wishing to mourn a parent, child or grandparent – finding exactly the right grave is always a bit of a pot-luck situation. Each time I visit Mum, I am sure I know where she is, but invariably end up at the wrong plot.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“Muslim cemeteries aren’t like other cemeteries. There are no ornate flower arrangements laid on graves; no gilded tombstones that tower above the others, emblematic of the deceased’s status and wealth in life; and no engraved eulogies – ‘Loving father, husband, son’, for example – symbolising a legacy left behind, a proud heritage continued. Muslim burial plots make no delineation between their occupants. They are mostly plain, a single plaque marking each grave detailing the person’s name, date of birth and date of death. These uniform graves make no distinction between wealth and class; here, a vagrant may spend eternity next to a millionaire. In these cemeteries, the dead are all equal, just as they were intended to be in life.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“I am angry, too, at God. If being gay is a sin, how could a kind and merciful god make me this way? Make my life so difficult? It is cruel and unjust to be punished for what I can’t control. I never chose to be attracted to men, to fall in love with a man, and there have been so many times I’ve considered how much easier my life would be if I were like Abed or Asad or any of the other Bengali boys. But I can’t live a lie. I have to live my truth.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“Are you sure? Was it okay?’ I say. ‘Yes, man, you nailed it!’ Hussein says, giving me a hug. I can smell his cologne, citrusy and fresh. He smells good. I’m reminded of the attraction I felt at the mosque and suddenly feel timid.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“Opening up a book unlocks the imagination, it transports you to a different world, it inspires, it teaches you about people and cultures you might not otherwise know about. And”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“Love is a gift. Mariam's words stick with me. People are more concerned by what two men or two women do in bed than about love. Love is companionship, feeling content and safe in the arms of another person. It is the mundane moments when you know the other person is there but you don't need to speak - their presence is enough, the meals shared, the walks taken, not just sex. What is so wrong about that?”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“I didn’t expect to get into a deep discussion about cultural differences right now, but I am glad that Joshua sees my point. I still feel that the issue isn’t fully resolved, that Joshua is being a little too defensive. I don’t think Josephine is purposefully trying to impose a big English wedding in Dorset on us, like some reverse Sharia law. Nor do I think she is racist for not considering my culture. White people, in my experience, tend to be a little hostile and uncomfortable when confronted about their blind spots when it comes to race or culture. It’s almost like the accusation of racial or cultural bias is more offensive than the behaviour itself.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“It’s things like this – unconscious bias – that always makes me stop and think: How welcome are we really? How integrated can we really be? Even if people appear nice and not-racist, these generalisations about us are always going to be there in the backs of their minds – what they think they know about us. It’s always going to colour the way they see us. It’s not fair.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“gave me the breathing room to re-enter society at my own pace,”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“Part of it is Elijah, who has become something of an older gay Yoda to me over the years, with his salt-and-pepper hair, wisps of grey in his beard and, with the comfortability of later life, the stockier build he has settled into. His arresting hazelnut eyes, ambiguous Middle Eastern features and olive skin make him a catch in his fifties. I hope I look this good when I’m his age, knowing full well that I won’t be so lucky.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out

“True cruelty isn’t dropping bombs on a faceless enemy, but what we are capable of doing to the ones we claim to love.”
― Tufayel Ahmed, This Way Out