Backyard Starship Quotes

“People were messy, and not just in a shedding-dead-skin-cells sort of way. They were messy emotionally and had mental states that could whipsaw from one extreme to the other, sometimes almost instantly.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“You can go from winning to dead in a space battle really quickly”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Any idea what this thing is?” I asked. Perry answered. “It’s a box.” “No shit.” “Sorry, Van, but we can’t really be more specific. It’s literally a box. Whatever’s inside it is something we’d have to find out by opening it.” “You can’t, like, scan it or anything?” “The Dragonet’s scanners aren’t meant for that sort of work. There are portable rigs that could do it, but we don’t have one of those aboard—and no, we didn’t have one your grandfather bargained away. They’re just pretty damned expensive.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“I’d just been fist-bumped by a giant talking crab. On the dead surface of a barren planet lit by two dim, red suns. Eleven light-years from Earth--a distance which I’d covered aboard an intelligent spaceship, accompanied by an AI bird and the heiress to a helium-3 mining fortune. It would make one hell of a good sci-fi story.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“holy crap, the weapons. Putting together everything for sale in that concourse, I swear there was more firepower than the entire US military.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“It’s like, I don’t know, finally clawing your way off the surface of Earth and flying into the boundless, awesome mystery of space—and finding out the DMV is already there, issuing freakin’ permits.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Space is both friendly and cruel. A mixed message, if you will.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“We spent the rest of the day drinking coffee and wandering the farm, with me explaining Earthly lore to Torina. It struck me that the story of our planet was fantastically complex, which made me realize that every planet I’d encountered, dozens of them, had histories as rich, and complicated, and nuanced, and sometimes ridiculous or infuriating, as Earth did. When I thought about the sum total of all that stuff, I was quiet for a moment or three. The galaxy was… complicated.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Okay, then. Home, and away. Whenever the galaxy gets a bit big, we’ll make it small again. By going home.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“This point was where the Stillness added their most cunning touch. They offered some sugar to put in that bitter, bitter pill of extortion. Whatever wealth the targets managed to plunder on behalf of the Stillness, they got to keep a fifth of it. And with advanced tech provided by the Stillness to help them out, they could get very rich, very fast. Then there was no end to the money, the good works, the military might or the sexual satisfaction. It was a win-win. Or maybe more of win-don’t-lose-but-still-come-out-ahead.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Once they’d identified the most promising ways of compromising people in their target society, they looked for individuals that were most susceptible to them—the greediest, the most generous, the most militaristic, the most sex-driven. They would then carefully engineer things to put those specific targets into the most vulnerable positions possible. The greediest would suddenly find themselves broke, or even owing money. The altruist would face a scandal, a real one, or even a manufactured one, that threatened to undo a lifetime of good work. The militarist likewise would find themselves suspected of leaking secrets to the enemy. And the sexually hungry, the—well, the sky was pretty much the limit when it came to them.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Shadows-- Stillness agents-- would infiltrate a society, and take some time to tease out its pressure points. Was the population generally greedy and capitalistic? Money was the pressure point. Was it more altruistic and motivated by a desire to help others, like the Synergists? Then opportunities to do good was a pressure point. Was it militaristic? Then advanced military tech was its particular pressure point. Driven by sexual need? Okay, that one was obvious.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“His moral compass has a needle that points any way he wants it to.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“You’re Mark Tudor’s grandson, aren’t you?” he asked. “In the flesh.” “I knew Mark pretty well. A good Peacemaker and an even greater person. I was sorry to hear about his Return.” I glanced at Perry, and he said, “Bester’s people believe that all beings come from, and return to, a single, universal intelligence.” “And by Returning to it, Mark enriches it with his memories, his beliefs and values.” I nodded at that. I actually liked it. It was a comforting idea.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Lots of people make promises to do things once they get the means. But lots of them then renege on those promises when they actually have the means.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Yes. Ahh. And club music is more like—” I thought for a second and then did my best impersonation of every European DJ I’d ever heard. “Like nnn-tst-nnn-tst-nnn-tst.” “Oh! We call that Asterlille songs,” Torina said with a laugh. “Beautiful word. What’s it mean?” “Translated, it means songs for those who love to look at themselves.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Peacemakers are well aware that it’s far from a perfect system, but all agree that it’s the least terrible one that the GKU could be using,” Netty said.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Hey, what can I say? Inspiration knows no schedule.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Don’t go down the if only road—just don’t, because it never led anywhere good.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Perry and I followed her, walking straight into a billowing cloud of vapor that smelled like an unholy mix of skunk and strawberries. It emanated from a pair of aliens mostly consisting of frond-like appendages. They sat at a table, waving their fronds through the smoke, which wafted up from a small brazier.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“irised”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“What’s so funny?” Perry asked. I looked at him. “Life. The universe. Everything.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Some things are simply too fast or relentless to avoid. Like the rain. Or the future.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Protecting my vital bits has always been a priority for me.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“There was a reason I’d always tended to stay away from the financial side of cyber-ops. I wouldn’t call myself irresponsible with my money, but I’d always had a, here’s money, here are things I need or want to spend it on, done sort of approach to finances.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Now, take all of that and have it performed by big, anthropomorphic birds, and you’ll understand why my very first thought was a flashback to that time I tried mushrooms in college.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the strength to change the things I can—” “And wisdom to know the difference,”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“I popped open the car door and ran. It didn’t matter, of course. Some things are simply too fast or relentless to avoid. Like the rain. Or the future.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship

“Waldo’s chip had two extra pins.”
― J.N. Chaney, Backyard Starship