Dave the Villager 36 Quotes

“The five of them (and the robot cow head) all looked at the endless dark tunnel in front of them. The walls were made from gray stone brick, and there were occasional redstone lights embedded into the ceiling, although most of them had stopped working, and the others were flickering on and off. “Well, I guess we’re going through the tunnel,” said Dave. “Yay,” said Carl sarcastically. “I’m sure nothing bad will happen in this dark, scary tunnel. Nothing bad at all.” CHAPTER SIXTEEN Something Bad Happens in the Dark, Scary Tunnel The”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“IN BOOK 35: HOGLINS ARE LIVING CREATURES SO HOW COME IT SAYS PIGLIN BRUTES WERE THE FIRST "LIVIING CREATURES" DAVE SAW? GOOD POINT, I’LL GET THIS CHANGED! How do you pronounce Spidroth? Spid-roth. “Spid” rhymes with “did”, and “roth” rhymes with “cloth”.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“CHAPTER SIXTEEN Something Bad Happens in the Dark, Scary Tunnel”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“animatronics”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“had a distinct impression that something was watching them. He hoped it was just spiders, but some of the things he heard scuttling about sounded bigger than spiders. “Hold on a second, chaps,” said Porkins, stopping and turning around. “Something’s wrong.” Dave turned to see what Porkins was looking at. Looking behind, he could see the torches that he’d placed. “What is it, Porkins?” Dave asked.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“I’m a potato boy! I want to cause mischief!”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Glow Squids!”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“lava,”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“into”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“puppies”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“enough”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“that’s”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“hoo! Alex screamed happily. “This is fun!” “Chaps… I don’t feel so good…” groaned Porkins. “BLUUUUURGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!” Suddenly Porkins vomited, and it flew backward, covering Dave and Spidroth, who were both sat behind him. “Porkins, no!” Dave screamed. “Arrgh, stop!” yelled Spidroth. “Stop, you oaf!” “BLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Porkins vomited again, and once more, Dave and Spidroth got covered. “How much mushroom stew did you eat?!” Dave groaned. “I’m sorry, chaps, I’m so sorry…” said Porkins. “I think that’s all of it now, I — BLUUUUUURRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “PORKINS!” Spidroth screamed. “I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!” Finally, they reached the bottom of the mountain and skidded slowly to a stop. Carl was standing there waiting for them. “What happened?” he asked, looking at Dave and Spidroth, who were both covered in half-digested mushroom stew. “Don’t ask,” said Dave.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“leaned her head against his shoulder. “Spidroth,” said Dave, “do you… do you want to be my girlfriend?”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“continued grinned”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Alex”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“I don’t want you to change,” said Dave. “I love you the way you are.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Dave, who was fast asleep in his own bed, his big nose squished against his pillow. Spidroth grinned.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Some of them had lost all their potato flesh and were nothing more than balls of metal”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“I’m sorry, chaps, I’m so sorry…” said Porkins. “I think that’s all of it now, I — BLUUUUUURRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “PORKINS!”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“It’s a lovely day, and I’m by a lake with a girl I really like, Dave thought to himself. In normal circumstances, this would be a great day – if the girl didn’t hate me and I wasn’t being attacked by killer robot potatoes.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“it really a good idea to go on a ride that hasn’t been used in over one hundred years with no one around to help me if things go horribly wrong? Alex wondered to herself. Then she decided that yes — yes, it was a good idea.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Dave turned and headed back down the train track, but when he got outside, his mouth dropped open in shock. Surrounding the station were hundreds and hundreds of white zombies, all staggering towards the building. “Oh great,” sighed Carl, looking out at the endless zombies. “Zombies. Why does it always have to be zombies?” “To be fair, old bean, it’s not always zombies,” said Porkins. “Ok, then why does it sometimes have to be zombies?” said Carl. “I’d rather it was never zombies at all.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Dave and the others walked around the building. The building was surrounded by clumps of bushes and vines grew up its walls, but it looked like it had once had a lovely garden. When they reached the other side of the building, they saw a minecart track. It led from inside the building and then went off across the savanna, disappearing into the distance. The track seemed to lead right up to the huge white walls. The minecart track was twice as wide as they usually were. Suddenly an old music box embedded into one of the walls crackled into life, almost making Dave jump out of his skin. “Welcome to Redstone Land Station!” said a recorded voice. “You’re about to have the most fantastic vacation of your life, enjoying all the fun rides and experiences that our theme park has to offer. Ride on a rollercoaster! Stay at our luxury hotels! Chill out by our swimming pools! Or, if you’re feeling adventurous, why not join one of our tour groups and take a two-day horse ride to Bedrock City? This mysterious city has been abandoned for centuries. What kind of people used to live there? Nobody knows! But what we do know is that our Bedrock City tours are a fantastic deal — only forty emeralds per person, and kids get to go free! And if you’re feeling even more adventurous, you can take one of our tours to the Far Lands. Yes, beyond Bedrock City is one of the four edges of the world, a mysterious place where anything can happen! But I’m getting ahead of myself. For now, jump on the train and enjoy the leisurely ride to Redstone Land. The buffet carriage is at the back and is stocked with delicious food and drink! Terms and conditions apply. Redstone Land is not responsible for any injuries or loss of life experienced during one of our Bedrock City or Far Lands tours.” “Okay, that was weird,” said Carl. Suddenly the old music box spluttered into life once more and began to play the same message: “Welcome to Redstone Land Station! You’re about to have the most fantastic — “ WHAM! Carl slammed one of his golem fists into the music box, making it go POOF. A record fell out, and Carl picked it up and flung it across the savanna.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“As they got closer, Dave saw that the outside of the walls was surrounded by a huge moat. The train was heading towards a bridge leading across the moat, but as far as Dave could see, there was no hole for the train to pass through. “Is this train just going to crash into those walls?” said Carl, peering out of one of the broken windows. “Which idiot designed this thing?” They sped across the moat, and Dave had a brief glimpse of a deep pit with water at the bottom of it. They were rushing straight towards the quartz walls, and in a few seconds, they would smash into them. “Everyone, brace yourselves!” Dave shouted. They all held on tightly to the seats as the train sped forward, but the crash never happened. Instead, a pair of large quartz doors opened, allowing the train to pass through. The next thing they knew, they were inside the theme park, still speeding along the train track. Dave caught glimpses of rides and shops and buildings as they zoomed forward, going deeper and deeper into the park. “Robot idiot, why isn’t the train stopping?” Carl demanded. “We’re inside the theme park now.” “When you say ‘robot idiot’, are you referring to me?” the friendly voice on the speakers asked. “Yes,” said Carl. “You’re a robot, and you’re an idiot, so I’m calling you a robot idiot.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Dave heard BURRing. He turned and saw that the bouldering zombies had begun to clamber through the holes in the wall that the fire had created and climb down the ladder from the roof. Before long, the train was surrounded by gray zombies, trying to break in and get them. “We’re definitely gonna die now,” sighed Carl. “I might as well eat my final baked potatoes. At least I’ll die happy then. Well, as happy as someone can be while they’re being eaten alive by zombies.” “I thought you said this train drove itself?” Spidroth said to Dave. “I thought it did,” said Dave, starting to panic. Now that they were in the passenger car, there was no way of getting back to the train car without leaving the car and going through all the zombies. Then, just as Dave was starting to lose all hope, the train began to rumble, the redstone lights above them switching on, and a friendly robotic voice coming out of a speaker. “Hello, theme park visitors!” said the voice. “Are we all ready for a wonderful vacation?” “JUST GET THIS TRAIN MOVING, FOOL!” Spidroth bellowed.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“BLUUUUURGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!” Suddenly Porkins vomited, and it flew backward, covering Dave and Spidroth, who were both sat behind him. “Porkins, no!” Dave screamed. “Arrgh, stop!” yelled Spidroth. “Stop, you oaf!” “BLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Porkins vomited again, and once more, Dave and Spidroth got covered. “How much mushroom stew did you eat?!” Dave groaned. “I’m sorry, chaps, I’m so sorry…” said Porkins. “I think that’s all of it now, I — BLUUUUUURRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” “PORKINS!” Spidroth screamed. “I’M GOING TO KILL YOU!”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“If the Old People had things like command blocks, which are pretty much the most powerful thing in the game, how did Herobrine manage”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“You’re a robot, and you’re an idiot, so I’m calling you a robot idiot.” “Technically, I am not a robot; I am an artificial intelligence,” said the voice cheerily. “As for whether or not I am an idiot, that is not for me to decide.” “Don’t worry, I’ve already decided it for you,” said Carl.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books

“Unfortunately, instead of making people laugh, they made people dead.”
― Dave Villager, Dave the Villager 36: Unofficial Minecraft Books