The Love Interest Quotes

“This is real and we’re at the good part and I am in it with him.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“Jed keeps texting me selfies from some loft party in Queens. He took a picture with a woman that he thought was the girl from Glee but was in fact a very elegant floor lamp with a wig on it. So he’s having fun.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I will sign an affidavit acknowledign that this is a consensual relationship and that you are an exceptionally thoughtful and magnificent lover.”
“Well, I would like to have that in writing.”
“I will have a plaque made for you.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I’m becoming a woman for him, I think. The sexiest, most intoxicating version of myself. This must be some kind of reproductive evolution. My body wants to make babies with him, so it’s making me do all the porny things I’ve never been inspired to do for anyone else.
I am pretty sure my blood content is about ninety percent sex hormones right now.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I want you, Fiona. I want you, and I’m not asking you to wait for me. I’m yours. Now.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“We’re going to be so in love with each other that we’ll always drive each other nuts. Our greatest passion in life will be each other. If it scares her, I will show her she doesn’t have to be afraid of it – or me. She doesn’t have to let everything else fall away. She only has to trust that once I’ve made the decision to love a woman, I won’t let go of her.
She can count on me.
I just need her to sit on my face for like half an hour so I can convince her of this.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I can’t make you wait for me.”
“But you want me to? You want me to wait for you?”
“I have no right to ask you to.”
“If you asked me to, I would. If you told me that you wanted me…” Her voice is trembling, and it’s killing me. “If you want me to be yours, I will wait for you.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“It’s almost as if we exist in three separate parallel universes now. In these letters. In our manuscripts. And in the real world, on campus, where you are a grumpy assface. Just know that in the real world, beneath my sassy demeanor is a rapidly beating heart.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I would really love if it you wouldn’t be so rude to me in class.”
“I don’t think I’m rude to you. I’m just not as nice to you as you’d like me to be.”
“I don’t understand why you can’t be nice to me – it’s not my fault I’m in your class. I tried to get out of it.”
“I’m aware of that.”
“Then what else can I do, Emmett?”
“Don’t call me Emmett.”
“Veronica calls you Emmett.”
“Veronica doesn’t need a spanking.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I’m mildly lactose intolerant, so a milkshake isn’t a great idea. Although I did once have a really intense sex dream about sharing a milkshake with Chachi after my mom made me binge watch Happy Days with her. So consequently, milkshakes have the potential to give me both diarrhea and orgasms. Which is the worst combination imaginable.”
Shit. Maybe he didn’t hear anything I said just now.
After staring at me for about infinity seconds, he finally deadpans, “Well, I’m more of a Fonzie, so it doesn’t sound like you could handle it.”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest

“I don’t even believe it can happen more than once.
Why should it?
Why should something that magnificent be anything other than a once-in-a-lifetime event?”
― Kayley Loring, The Love Interest