He Who Fights with Monsters Quotes

“When you’re just a face in the crowd, then you can hold an ideal without being required to live up to it.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Are you saying your world’s better than mine?” Jason asked. “We have magic,” Gary said. “We have internet porn,” Jason said.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“You already know the question.” “Yet you must ask it. Only then will the responsibility for hearing the answer be yours.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Yes,” Jason said, “I’m not very smart and simple formalities are super-hard to figure out. It’s definitely not that I find them to be a set of arbitrary behavioural norms that serve as a tool of exclusionary tribalism and that eschewing the rituals of cultural performance facilitates the fostering of new relationships by having both sides step out of their preconceived societal modes.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Are you a child?” Ernest asked. “Mate, we’re about to go flying across the desert in giant magic toboggans. If that doesn’t eke out any childlike wonder, then you might want to check your soul’s still in there.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Don’t muddy the waters unless muddy water is useful to you.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“What about you, Mr Asano? What are you looking for in a woman?” “Evil genius,” Jason said casually. “Evil genius?” she asked, eyebrows raised. “Why not? Smart, confident, assertive, driven. What’s not to like?” “The evil?” Cassandra ventured. “That could be a problem long-term,” Jason acknowledged. “Maybe what I need is a naughty genius.” He thought it over for a moment as an impish grin took over his face. “Yeah,” he said, voice purring. “That sounds exactly right.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Does it make you feel better to disrespect things others find meaningful?”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“The trowel looked rather sinister, made out of some kind of black metal with a red sheen. It carried the wear marks of having been used as a planting tool, but also had a razor edge that seemed wholly unnecessary for gardening purposes. “Blood cult?” Jason read unhappily from the item description. “Who gardens with an evil trowel?”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Do you have aristocracy in your world?” “Sure,” Jason said. “We’re slowly phasing it out in favour of wealth-based oligarchy, but it’s still around.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“An interesting fact about the goddess of knowledge is that she knows everything that anyone in this world knows, including me. Which means she knows a bunch of Mario Kart shortcuts, which is kind of awesome.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“People. Are. Vegetarians,” he yelled through gritted teeth. Every word punctuating a strike to the knee. “Vegetables. Aren’t. People-tarians!”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Manipulation isn’t bad, in and of itself,” Jason said. “Look at it this way: if you have the choice between manipulating someone into doing the right thing, or punishing them for doing the wrong thing, which is more moral? Pushing someone onto a better path and to do the right thing done, or having the wrong thing done and hurting the person for doing it? Righteous honesty says to be upright and put the moral decision onto the other person. But what is more important? Feeling righteous or putting a little more good into the world?”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Don’t worry about him, Mose,” Humphrey said. “Just remember that if you’re talking to Jason and you get confused, he’s probably up to something. If you’re talking to Jason and you’re not confused, then he’s definitely up to something.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“You’re quite the spirited dancer,” Gabrielle told Jason as they walked leisurely around the dance floor. “You never did tell me the name.” “It’s called the tango,” Jason said. “Is it well known, in your world?” “It’s probably the most famous dance there is. It was my older sister who taught me to dance. I wasn’t very interested until my father gave me some sage advice. He told me that if I wanted to be successful in love, I needed to learn three things. How to dance, how to cook, and how to keep my damn mouth shut.” “How did that work out?” “Well,” Jason said, “I can dance and I can cook.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Oh yeah, I found religion, which is kind of a big deal. I didn’t join, but I found it.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“I WENT TO A MAGICAL ALTERNATE UNIVERSE AND ALL I GOT WAS VAST COSMIC POWER.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Anisa gave Jason an unhappy glare. “You,” she said, making it sound like a swear word, “may address me as Priestess.” Jason didn’t care for being talked to like he was something scraped off the bottom of a boot. “Well you,” he said with an insolent grin, “may address me as Rakishly Handsome Jason.” “Excuse me?” Anisa said, barely believing what she just heard. “You’re excused,” Jason said pompously, as he looked away. “Just don’t let it happen again.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Then, figure out how to stay out of my sight, because if I ever see you again, I might just slap you so hard it changes your religion”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“It was tricky to put a wrist lock on something that didn’t have a wrist.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Rufus walked to where Jason stood next to the book and placed a hand on it. “The book will give you the techniques,” he said. “We will show you how, when and why to use them.” “By beating it into me,” Jason said. “That’s right,” Gary said from behind the cooker. “We’re going to beat you like a drum.” “Suddenly I’m a lot less excited,” Jason said. “Couldn’t you just let me have my moment of happiness?” “I just don’t want you to think learning martial arts from a book will magically make you good at fighting.” “That’s a disappointment,” Jason said, “given its literal purpose is to magically make me good at fighting.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Did you check for an index?” Gary asked. Farrah’s eyes landed on Gary like attack dogs. “I guess there’s no time for research,” Gary said, heading for the stairs. “Let’s go,” Rufus said, following after Gary. Farrah watched them vanish down the steep staircase, then turned to the back of the book. Jason narrowed his eyes as he watched her. “Are you checking for an index?”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“You don’t just start off good at difficult things,” Gary said. “You have to begin at bad and work your way up.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“I don’t think being numb to it all makes you strong,” Jason said. “Strong is accepting the choices you make and owning up to the consequences.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“than where I grew up, so I look different from most of the people I know. People in my own country look at me like I’m a foreigner. Even the people who do look like me call me a banana.” “A banana?” Farrah asked. “Yellow on the outside, white on the inside,”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“You’re still causing trouble,” the woman said to Jason. “First my son, now my daughter? They may have been worthless, but weren’t for the likes of you to kill.” “Not a lot of pictures up on your fridge, I’m guessing.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“If you look at a pond and see a moon,” she said, “is that moon within the pond, or is it a reflection of something much greater, very far away?”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“The snake slithering across the lawn gets shot. The one waiting for the toddler to wander near the tall grass gets fed.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Rufus looked over at Jason, then back out at the night sky. “I’m an adventurer,” Rufus said. “Being an adventurer can open every door, give you everything you ever wanted. Power, money, respect. Travel the world, see amazing things. Nine days out of ten, being an adventurer is the best thing you could possibly be. But on that tenth day, that’s the one when you earn all the others. When you make the hard choices, when you walk through fire so no one else has to.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters

“Knowing isn't the same as understanding.”
― Shirtaloon, He Who Fights with Monsters