On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down Quotes

“No one ever needs an excuse to eat tacos. Now I want tacos.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“started preaching all sorts of fucked-up shit that of course gained him cult followers because humans are stupid and that’s how it works.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“here I thought a battlefield was a place where armies fought each other, not where soldiers murdered unarmed men, women, and children.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“the site of the mass murder is officially referred to as the Wounded Knee Battlefield.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“She was a painter who became radicalized toward Irish nationalism and women’s rights in 1907 when she engaged in that perilous and mind-altering practice of…reading books.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“fucking Nazis were bugshit bonkers to begin with, but Hitler’s decision to pick a fight with America while already fighting a bunch of other countries remains a mystery.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“No one is owed your admiration. No one.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“We should not praise people as heroes, because we will always find reason to be disappointed, crushed, or aghast.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“because the idea that women are equal to men still seems a radical idea to many,”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“So, yeah, no sticky man-chowder involved.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Mary was a virgin who was impregnated not by Joseph, but by the Holy Spirit.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“I guess you can’t create a god by lots of grunting and sweating and spurting of DNA and only one person having an orgasm. It’s just too ignoble.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Alcohol overindulgence is no joke. In the United States about 90,000 people die each year from over-imbibing, and roughly a quarter trillion dollars is lost each year, mostly in terms of hindered workplace productivity;”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“when Churchill asked Stalin, yo what are your postwar “territorial ambitions” and Stalin said, “There is no need to speak at this present time about any Soviet desires.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“launching Operation Overlord to invade Normandy on June 6.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Eight years of exile followed, then Vlad III Dracula said fuck that cousin-douche Vladislav and invaded his homeland again,”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Germans sent in their reserves to protect their southern flank, but it wasn’t enough. They couldn’t stop the encirclement. They were F U fucking fucked.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“The Jewish people have been attacked and oppressed since, well, forever.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Traitorous general Robert Lee led his traitorous Confederate Army against Union general George Meade. After three days, the combined casualties numbered approximately 50,000.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“The Battle of Gettysburg”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“on November 13, 1947, he completed what he would name the Avtomat Kalashnikova Model 1947. Aka the AK-47.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Mikhail Kalashnikov was the seventeenth of nineteen chil—Oh my god his poor mother.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“the single military invention that has killed more people than any other, that was created by a Soviet tank mechanic shortly after the end of World War II.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“it didn’t even get rid of the whale. They blew a fair-sized chunk out of it, but most of the carcass remained right where it was. What wasn’t around anymore was a single fucking seagull.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“they did the kaboom, and it did not neatly blow the whale into little bite-sized chunks. Rather, it threw massive chunks as far as three hundred yards, raining stenchy whale gore down upon the crowd. One piece the size of an NFL offensive lineman destroyed a car in the parking lot.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“The whalesplosion, which took place on November 12, 1970,”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“The idea is that they would blow it to literal bits that would be small enough for scavengers such as seagulls to come along and say oh wow thanks bits of exploded rotting sperm whale is my favorite, and eat it all up and smelly problem solved.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“For eight years the racism festered like an infected wound, becoming a major contributor to the election of the blatantly racist and vocal Obama critic Donald Trump to the presidency in 2016.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“Republicans made every effort to block Obama’s policies no matter what they were.”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down

“The Tea Party, aka the American Taliban,”
― James Fell, On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down