Not What I Expected Quotes

“Men are dogs ... they just are. They need constant praise and rewards. Women are pack mules—we work without praise for long days, recover quickly, and wake up the next day plodding right along again. No treats. No pats on the head. No belly rubs.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected: Special Edition

“That numbing reality that I would have been okay without him for … the rest of my life. It was the jagged knife that cut so deeply it punctured my soul. In some ways, it made me question if I had a soul.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Maybe humans weren’t made to be together forever. Maybe ’til death do us part was a punishment more than a promise.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“I don’t know where that balance exists—the one between loving yourself and loving others. Maybe it doesn’t exist.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Were we really put on this earth to please other people? Are kindness and love defined as doing whatever it takes to make someone else happy?”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“When is it okay to be happy without anyone’s permission, without judgment”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“hit a point where to save “us” I would have had to let part of my soul die.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Show her that we never stop changing. Show her that life never stops giving us opportunities to build character and be humbled by unexpected circumstances. She’ll love you more for not having all the answers. Humans gravitate toward imperfection. Like comfort food.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Listening to a man brag about unloading the dishwasher or the incessant need to announce every single thing he did in a day. That stuff is worth something. Give him a bone! Men are dogs ... they just are. They need constant praise and rewards. Women are pack mules—we work without praise for long days, recover quickly, and wake up the next day plodding right along again. No treats. No pats on the head. No belly rubs.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Maybe there was no distinguishable line between selfless and selfish—each required a sacrifice. We existed somewhere in the middle, but that middle was incredibly hard to find. Happiness wasn’t given; it was self-possessed. It had to come from within to be real.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“the ultimate love is freedom. It’s not releasing someone; it’s respecting their right to never be caged in the first place, never belonging to anyone but yourself. When people so desperately want out of a marriage or relationship, that implies they feel imprisoned with a need to escape. I don’t want to ever be anyone’s prison.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“The problem with marriage and most of the vows people made to each other was there weren’t the actions to back them up.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“I still love him. Sometimes love isn’t enough. Sometimes freedom is greater than love. Or maybe it’s the ultimate love. I don’t know.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“I think kids are great. I was really good at being one. I just don’t want the responsibility, and I don’t think this world needs to add to its population at the moment when we haven’t figured out how to take care of all the humans who are already here.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Expectations are a prelude to failure.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“The world was built on truth, but it runs on lies. Over time, we bend the lies to make them true, to make ourselves feel less guilty about our honest feelings.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Being with someone for a moment in time while just forgetting the rest of the world.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“But it’s not because I don’t believe. I just don’t like the expectations. The accountability. You miss one Sunday, and the following week, everyone gives you the third degree. You know, inadvertently butting their noses into your business. ‘Hi, Jan. We missed you last week. Hope everything’s okay?’ And you can’t just say that you didn’t want to get your ass out of bed and come. Nope, that’s frowned upon like you were too lazy for God, so you have to lie. Isn’t that fantastic? Christians lying because they don’t want to be judged, which happens to be a rule they are the very best at breaking. And don’t even get me started on the snoopiness and shame that comes with passing on the offering plate.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“When is it okay to be happy without anyone’s permission, without judgment? And I mean anyone. Your parents, Craig’s parents, your children, your friends, the people who go to your church, me? Were we really put on this earth to please other people? Are kindness and love defined as doing whatever it takes to make someone else happy?”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“The passion was gone. The attraction died too.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Because I’ve fallen out of love with you. You will always own a piece of my heart, but you are not the reason it beats.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“However, the book was my story and my story alone. “Don’t let anyone else write your story.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Ron. I still love him. Sometimes love isn’t enough. Sometimes freedom is greater than love. Or maybe it’s the ultimate love. I don’t know.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“body. If you want to get biblical … then here’s the deal. You have one thing to do. Love. That’s it. It’s that simple. You don’t have to police me or anyone else. The one lesson that mattered the most to me while raising you kids was for you to know that being kind humans and showing love to everyone is the greatest purpose—maybe the only true purpose—you have in this life.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“If we were nothing more than souls in mortal bodies, why did taking such pleasure have to be filled with rules and tainted in shame? Why couldn’t we let our brains and hearts love, but let our bodies feel the tangible things in life that made our hearts race, our skin tingle, and our muscles grip and pulse in immeasurable rapture? Really? Why the fuck not?”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“I miss him, but only because there are fifty unfinished projects around our house.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.” - Richard Bach”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“I am whole without a man in my life.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“Want to know the hardest … coldest … rawest truth? I don’t miss you because you’re no longer in my life … I miss you because you’re no longer in this life.”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected

“The truth usually is. That’s why most people lie so much. The world was built on truth, but it runs on lies. Over time, we bend the lies to make them true, to make ourselves feel less guilty about our honest feelings. I loved your dad, but I also hated him for making it so hard to love him some days. Does that make sense?”
― Jewel E. Ann, Not What I Expected