An Effort to Understand Quotes

“Like characters in good books or movies, families and friends don't communicate with one another in composed prose. It's all action. Even the words we use- the movie characters' dialogue- are action. And it's almost all improvised.”
― David Murray, An Effort to Understand: Hearing One Another (and Ourselves) in a Nation Cracked in Half

“Except in situations of extreme uncertainty- invasions, assassinations, epidemics, earthquakes- people don't necessarily want to be told, "That's the way it is." But they do want to be told, "That's the way I think it is," by someone they feel they know, and by someone who lots of their friends feel they know.”
― David Murray, An Effort to Understand: Hearing One Another (and Ourselves) in a Nation Cracked in Half

“Gravitas was always problematic. To the extent that it implied its owner was above the shits and giggles and nervous jiggles of the rest of us, gravitas was a bluff, and a dangerous one at that. It put leaders of institutions- or as Vonnegut rightly called them, "persuasive guessers"- in the position of dads, and it allowed citizens to comfortably revert to their familiar and comfortable role as children. "That's the way it is," Walter Cronkite told us, and we were grateful he didn't send us to bed without dinner.”
― David Murray, An Effort to Understand: Hearing One Another (and Ourselves) in a Nation Cracked in Half

“Wisdom ages well.”
― David Murray, An Effort to Understand: Hearing One Another (and Ourselves) in a Nation Cracked in Half

“To be a fine human being, you have to be...
Strong and gentle
Proud and humble
Enthusiastic and calm
Fun and serious
Bold and careful
Self-aware, but not self-conscious
Candid and discreet
Discriminating and democratic
Loyal (when it's called for)
Generous, but not to a fault
Self-loving, but not self-worshiping
Sometimes aggressive but never violent
Intellectual and instinctive
Logical and musical.”
― David Murray, An Effort to Understand: Hearing One Another (and Ourselves) in a Nation Cracked in Half