Declarative Language Handbook Quotes

“If we want kids to feel connected and develop both social connection and joint attention, we must start with our own communication. We must use a speaking style that fosters this type of communication. Imperative language does not foster social connection or social interaction. Declarative statements do.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“Declarative language creates a situation in which a child can feel empowered to get the help they need, rather than shamed by their vulnerabilities.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“Demands can make kids feel inadequate. But declarative language empowers them to feel competent, understand the world better, develop self-awareness, and self-advocate.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“Declarative language naturally provides opportunity for social learning across the areas of seeing the big picture, reading nonverbal communication, problem solving, perspective taking, and self-advocating.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“Declarative language is a comment or a statement. It is that simple. Usually it is a statement that observes.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“But here’s the thing… demands can trigger, or activate, the fight/ flight/ freeze response. Whether real or not, the brain may interpret a demand as a threat. When this happens, the lower brain goes into a defensive or offensive state.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“When kids feel competent, they become happier kids, kids who are more open to learning, and kids who invite future learning challenges.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“This book is not about getting kids to do chores or do tasks though. Rather, it is about creating opportunities for them to solve problems and feel empowered themselves.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood

“I think most people agree the following areas are difficult for individuals with social learning challenges: seeing the big picture, being flexible, managing impulses, taking the perspective of others, problem solving in real time, and reading nonverbal communication. For some kids, learning how to connect with others through the sharing of memories, making plans for the near and distant future, and expressing emotions can also be a challenge. These are all big areas to consider and big areas to target. They are also areas that are constantly intertwined into every interaction and social opportunity that we have in life.”
― Linda K. Murphy, Declarative Language Handbook: Using a Thoughtful Language Style to Help Kids with Social Learning Challenges Feel Competent, Connected, and Understood