Midlife Bounty Hunter Quotes

“Behold, the field in which I grow my ducks. Lay thine eyes upon it and see that it is barren. Autocorrect might like it to be ducks, but we all know it wasn’t a row of quacking fowl.”
― Shannon Mayer, Grave Magic Bounty

“They did squats holding weights; I just squatted and prayed I wouldn’t pee my nice new pants.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“You aren’t old. That’s the world talking to you, telling you that you have no value because of your age. Darling girl, stop trying to be young and stupid. Own yourself, my girl. Own your wisdom and the things you’ve learned that brought you here, back to me. Back to where you’ve always belonged. Those twenty-somethings . . . they don’t know the power of a woman who owns every part of herself. The good, the bad, the ugly.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Menopause might have physical side effects—like the libido issue—but the rest was just a woman who’d given up trying to please everyone.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“If I’d learned anything at the ripe old age of forty-one, it was that no dream could last forever, and no man can save you from yourself.”
― Shannon Mayer, Grave Magic Bounty

“Behold, my field of ducks, and see that it is barren. Absolutely not one duck in sight as far as I could see.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“We often keep our secrets closer to protect those we love, but then we end up hurting them. It’s a common issue.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“I was not in shape in any sense of the word unless round-ish and slightly squishy counted as a shape.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“My hand brushed over a card that stuck to the tip of my index finger. I slid it out, face down, and pushed it across the table to her. “That was impressive,” she said softly. I shrugged. “Like I said, not my first time.” “That’s what she said,” Sarge mumbled. I shot him a look and realized Annie had done the same thing.”
― Shannon Mayer, Grave Magic Bounty

“Undignified, he looked more real.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“The thing was there wasn’t an incorrect statement in any of Eric’s words, and that’s why they hurt. Because just like that, I’d been dismissed, and for reasons I couldn’t really deny. I was older. I was a woman. I was out of shape. I was gliding into early menopause.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Behold, my field of ducks, and see that it is barren.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Behold, the field in which I grow my ducks. Lay thine eyes upon it and see that it is barren". Autocorrect might like it to be ducks, but we all know it wasn't a row of quacking fowl.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Stupid men thinking they are being smart by keeping secrets. Do they not know that women are like badgers? We will find all the secrets and then share them with each other.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“That wolf over there? Totally not native to the area. The right authorities would have to be brought in to remove him. They’d likely neuter him at the same time, what with his obvious poor breeding.” Sarge’s jaw dropped open and his tongue lolled out.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“I don’t have time to be bothered with fools. I mean, especially at my age.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Into the darkness,” I said softly, making my feet move. “And find the lights along the way.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“See ya ’round, Robert.” “Later.” I laughed. “Robert, be careful, I’ll think you’re flirting with me.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Carry forth, good man, and let the chips fall where they may. I’ve a feeling I was born for this.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Well, I suppose I’ve been on worse dates with Himself than with someone who’s legitimately dead.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Behold, the field in which I grow my ducks. Lay thine eyes upon it and see that it is barren”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“The truth is, sometimes they need to really see us. And they’re too dumb to see us without a little sparkle. After that, well, if they still can’t see you, then they aren’t the right one for you, darling. But without using a two-by-four to hit them upside the head, this is the next best thing.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“could”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“quite pull the thought forward. Something to do with the paperwork. I shook my head. Nothing”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter

“Corb leaned over me. “You ready to give up?” I looked straight up his nose. “You missed some hairs in the left nostril.” His nose flared. I pointed. “That flaring business is just making the long ones flutter. I mean, if you care about stuff like that.”
― Shannon Mayer, Midlife Bounty Hunter