Oral Robbers Quotes

“Grayson, what do you think Bertie’s secret is?” I asked, ignoring Earl. “Well, it isn’t bathing in the blood of virgins,” he replied. “Elizabeth Bathory proved that ineffective back in the 16th century.”
― Margaret Lashley, Oral Robbers

“It had been a crazy ride—akin to costarring in a low-budget remake of The X-Files. In redneck Florida. In a rundown RV.”
― Margaret Lashley, Oral Robbers

“I'm not kidding. People keep disappearing from here."
"New Port Richey? Of course they do, Bobbie. Anybody with brain cells and bus fare.”
― Margaret Lashley, Oral Robbers

“A lizard was using one of the coffees as a heated swimming pool.
Correction. A lizard was using Grayson's coffee as a heated swimming pool.”
― Margaret Lashley, Oral Robbers

“The first victim in Grayson's inane interview scheme was an elderly man wearing a straw hat and overalls, without the courtesy of an undershirt.
So that's what happened to Tom Sawyer.”
― Margaret Lashley, Oral Robbers

“You know, I’ve been thinking about what you said, about vampirism being the ultimate oral fixation.” I groaned. “Please, can we give this whole vampire thing a rest?” “I don’t mean vampires as blood suckers or soul suckers. But as oral robbers.” My brow furrowed. “Oral robbers?” “Yes. Those who steal with their mouths—not by way of fangs, but with words.” “I don’t understand,” I said. Grayson turned his back on me and reached back into the cupboard. “What if I told you I was thinking of letting you go, Drex?” My gut fell four inches. “What? Why? What did I do wrong?” He turned back around. “Did you feel an internal shift?” “Internal shift?” I said. “I feel destroyed. Like I want to throw up! Why are you doing this?” “To prove my point.” “What point? That I’m no good?” “No. That in a way, we’re all oral robbers—with our words.” “Huh?” I whined. Grayson studied me clinically. “All I did was utter some particular arrangement of tones through my vocal chords. You interpreted them as words, and applied your own meaning to them.” I was hurt. And on my last nerve with Grayson’s stupid analogies. “Come on, Grayson! Just tell me. Am I fired, or what?” Grayson locked his green eyes on mine. “My words formed images in your mind that sent chemical and hormonal secretions into your bloodstream, causing emotions that shifted your entire world view.” I glared at him. “Fine. I’ll pack my bags and leave with the Triple A guy.” “See?” Grayson said. “Now you’re insecure about your whole future, based on a couple of words that came out of my mouth.” “You’d be undone, too, if you just got fired and had to go back to Point Paradise and work with Earl!” “That’s just it,” Grayson said. “You don’t have to. I didn’t fire you. I only asked you, ‘What if I told you I was thinking of letting you go?’ You did the rest yourself.” I blanched. “So ... I’m not fired?” “No. Like I said before, it was all to prove my point. Every word we say is a psychic vampire, Drex, striking others with the power of suggestion that either drains or boosts the energy of its intended target.” “Oh,” I said, feeling a wave of confused relief wash over me. “In other words, we all live and die by the thoughts and words we chose to believe?”
― Margaret Lashley, Oral Robbers