Master of None Quotes

“He would swing.  I would dodge.  He would scream obscenities.  I would stab him.  He would yell new obscenities.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“managed to get a guy to raise his offer to a price above sticker just from staring at him silently while he tried to Haggle me.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“shitty smiths use shitty materials to make shitty product...and I’ll not have you shittifying my anvil.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“It takes money to make money, but being broke is free!”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“and then inhaling through it was considered to be a terrible idea.  Something about burning your lungs with air the temperature of the aforementioned molten glass.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“Apparently, having molten glass on one end of a big metal straw”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“you will eventually learn how to fix a dryer on your own, but there’s fewer structure fires if you just get some training.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“At one point, I made the mistake of asking why we had to hammer the swords into shape instead of just pouring the metal into a mold.  The Village Smith laughed for five minutes.  The worst part is he never answered the fucking question.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None

“I swear to God, Alfred, if I walk in on some sort of baby-making kobold orgy and you didn’t warn me, I’m requesting a new AI.”
― Shane Walker, Master of None