The Audacity of Hype Quotes

“Challenge’ is one of those words executives like to say at conferences. It makes them sound like they’re at the forefront of something. Words such as ‘modernisation’, ‘development technology’ and ‘the future’ are bandied about at any professional gathering, even if it’s one attended by just milkmen. The word that bugs me most at the moment is ‘choice’. Businesses and governments now say ‘choice’ as readily as a two-year-old says ‘poo’. Somehow our movers and shakers have got it into their heads that our lives are enriched by having available a vaster spread of options, but there are certain times when the last thing you need is a choice. When you’re ill, for example. You want to go straight to hospital, without having to decide which one. Yet our administrators think it’s nice we can now choose the hospital we go to. It’s a false choice. If there are two hospitals nearby, a good one and a terrible one, there’s nothing to be gained from offering sick people the option of going to the terrible one. Better to knock it down or improve it. People who choose to go to the terrible one need their heads examining, although not at the hospital they’ve just chosen.”
― Armando Iannucci, The Audacity of Hype: Bewilderment, sleaze and other tales of the 21st century

“Puppetry of the Foetus Dr Gunther von Hagens uses latest scientific mini-stick techniques to poke foetuses inside the womb into performing children’s tales with a bloody twist.”
― Armando Iannucci, The Audacity of Hype: Bewilderment, sleaze and other tales of the 21st century

“The junkbird attracts the attention of its prospective mate by opening wide a tail-fan of feathers spelling out, ‘You have already won a prize.”
― Armando Iannucci, The Audacity of Hype: Bewilderment, sleaze and other tales of the 21st century