The Narcissist in Your Life Quotes

“People with NPD operate unfairly and abusively, with a toxic cocktail of infantile neediness and selfish disregard for the needs of others. You have likely been used, shamed, gaslighted, bullied, perhaps terrorized, and, adding to the craziness, told in endless ways that you are to blame for the abuse.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“People with NPD can’t love. Developmentally stunted as young children, they did not learn to accept and love themselves and ultimately despise any club that would have them as a member. When they feel threatened, which is their default state, you become an object to them, not a someone, and they feel justified in treating you with scorn and bringing you to your knees.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Narcissists place their needs first and habitually devalue and harshly reject those most close to them, something emotionally healthy and empathetic people do not do, even if they wish to end a relationship.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“The bottom line is that narcissists nearly inevitably reach a point of contempt about everyone and everything.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“By planting shame in other people, narcissists in essence install a button they can press at any time to manipulate and punish those they seek to control.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Idealization in love is normal, but in longer-term relationships both people involved must be able to transition into a more realistic view of each other to sustain a healthy connection.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Repeat: The narcissist’s problems are not your fault and not your responsibility.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Whatever harm the narcissist does, if you are her/his primary scapegoat s/he finds a reason—however convoluted—to hold you responsible.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“The 1980 Oscar-winning best picture Ordinary People,4 based on the novel by Judith Guest,”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Regina Collins described the narcissistic family as one where “everyone is rotating around the narcissist on continual high alert, with consistently elevated stress”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Narcissists also may behave passive-aggressively, cloaking their rage in self-pitying performances meant to induce guilt and blame.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“It is literally impossible for people with narcissistic personality disorder to not eventually emotionally abuse whomever they are with.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“They aren’t just insensitive and selfish, arrogant and devaluing, manipulative and exploitative. They are also endlessly demanding. They want attention. They want approval. They want admiration. They want agreement. They want everyone around them to validate their distorted self-serving reality and continuously hold up a mirror reflecting that false reality back to them as if it were irrefutable fact.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Do unto others as I would never allow them to do unto me because I am better and more deserving, and by the way I need you to tell me and show me that I am superior and entitled 24/7 because I am deeply afraid I’m really not, and if you don’t give me what I demand right now, I’ll punish the hell out of you into perpetuity.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Life is a battle zone, and narcissists are always fighting for their survival.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“But it is vital to understand that narcissists do not care about their family’s needs, most tragically those of their children and partner, unless those needs happen to align with their own.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Narcissists are threatened by anyone, typically a family member, who sees their flaws or fails to reflect back the version of themselves they need to believe in.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Psychotherapist and author of The Narcissist You Know, Joe Burgo described narcissistic friendship this way to HuffPost: In my experience, narcissists rarely have lasting friendships, but when they do, those friendships are best described as a mutual admiration society: ‘I agree to support your inflated sense of self and you agree to support mine.’… These friendships can”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“For those treated to a narcissist’s extreme neediness, demands for special treatment, and callous attitude, the experience is draining and battering, like caring for an adult-size toddler armed with a nail gun.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Because narcissists are overwhelmingly concerned with getting support for their grandiose self-beliefs to defend against interior vulnerability, they are hyperdefensive and emotionally reactive.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“The narcissist’s abusive behavior is a cancer destroying your self-esteem, health, relationships, faith, and financial resources. However much you give the narcissist will never be enough, and what you hope to receive in return will not arrive.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Cognitively they are adults, but emotionally they are toddlers. Would you trust a toddler to understand your feelings, care about your needs, make decisions for you, or be a parent?”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Narcissistically disordered people by definition project their own shame onto others; routinely blame others for their problems; and violate emotional, psychological, and physical boundaries.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“The Narcissist Family Files (narcissistfamilyfiles.com).”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Survivors in a sense are all part of one big unhappy family, and finding that commonality can offer vital validation and insight along the healing path.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“If you’re someone who wants desperately to understand how your loved one can be so mean, arrogant, berating, bullying, and selfish when you work so hard to be caring, thoughtful, and kind… Then this book is for you.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“If you’re someone who is struggling to figure out why your partner, who used to tell you that you were so special, now can find nothing about you that is pleasing or positive…”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“They speak in superlatives and hyperbole. Having an all-or-nothing view of things, they tend to speak in exaggerated extremes, such as “best/worst,” “terrific/terrible,” and “perfect/worthless.” 9. They”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Rejected narcissists may fight with their spouse for child custody not because they want their children but as a way to hurt their ex. They also may launch a calculated smear campaign to discredit that ex and thereby gain the upper hand in court, within their social circle, and with their kids.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free

“Jūs esate atsakingi už: savo reakciją į tėvus, savo reakciją į kitus šeimos narius, ribų savo tėvams ir kitiems šeimos nariams nustatymą, savo lūkesčių valdymą. savo pasirinkimus, savo santykius, savo sveikatą, savo požiūrį, savo elgesį savo šeimoje, savo poreikių tenkinimą.”
― Julie L. Hall, The Narcissist in Your Life: Recognizing the Patterns and Learning to Break Free