The Black Flamingo Quotes

“Don’t.
Don’t come out unless you want to. Don’t come out for anyone else’s sake. Don’t come out because you think society expects you to.
Come out for yourself.
Come out to yourself.
Shout, sing it.
Softly stutter.
Correct those who say they knew before you did.
That’s not how sexuality works, it’s yours to define.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“You are a full human being. It's never as simple as being half and half.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Remember, you have the right to be proud; remember, you have the right to be you.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Your ignorance may be innocent but the racism is real. I want both of you to think about how what you said might make me feel.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Men are sandcastles made out of pebbles and the bucket is patriarchy: if you remove it, we fear we won’t be able to hold ourselves together, we pour in cement to fill the gaps to make ourselves concrete constructions.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“This book is a fairy tale  in which I am the prince  and the princess. I am  the king and the queen.  I am my own wicked  witch and fairy godmother.  This book is a fairy tale  in which I’m cursed  and blessed by others.  But, finally, I am the fair y  finding my own magic.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I’ve been friendly. I’ve been frightened. I’ve been fake. But I’ve never been fierce. I’ve been frustrated. I’ve been forgotten. I’ve been forgiving. But I’ve never been fierce. I wanna be fabulous. I wanna be flamboyant. I wanna flaunt what I’ve got. I want to be fierce.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“To have a loving family is to feel afraid and yet believe you are going to be all right.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Granddad asks, “Why does it matter if he’s black? The other flamingos don’t care.” And I’m certain what he’s saying is “I love you.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Be a bit gay, be very gay. Be the glitter that shows up in unexpected places.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I come from stories, myths, legends and folk tales”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“— I don’t want to pretend to be anyone, not any more."
"— So who is The Black Flamingo?"
"— He is me, who I have been, who I am, who I hope to become. Someone fabulous, wild and strong. With or without a costume on.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Mum is a costume she squeezed herself into, for you.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I am here and I have been here
long before this moment,
the first people were black
and queerness predates its modern meaning.
Queerness predates its derogatory meaning.
Queerness predates colonialism and Christianity.
Queerness predates any hate attached to it.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“This isn’t what I wanted for your moving daybut this is what it’s like to be black in this country or anywhere in the world. They interrupt our joy. Our history. Our progress. They know they can’t stop us unless they kill us but they can’t kill us all,so you’re living your life and suddenly interrupted by white fear or suspicion. They fear sharing anything. Our success is a threat.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I know that’s wrong, my thinking was wrong,
the different ones are often the most strong”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Don’t let anyone tell you
that you are half anything.
You and Anna are
simply brother and sister.

Don’t let anyone tell you
that she’s your half sister.

Don’t let anyone tell you
that you are half black
and half white. Half Cypriot
and half Jamaican.

You are a full human
being. It’s never as simple
as being half and half.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“When it's time to go onstage,
know that you're not ready but
this is not about being ready,
it's not even about being fierce
or fearless, it's about being free.

I don't have a clue what I'm doing
but that's not going to stop me.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Remember you have the right to be proud. Remember you have the right to be you.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I imagine us in Eden—
two black boys in Paradise,
naked, no fig leaves.
Adam and Eve are long gone,
so Kieran and Michael
inherit the garden
and the serpent is forgotten
and the fruit on the tree of knowledge
has gone rotten”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Don’t let anyone tell you
that you are half anything.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Remember you have the right to be proud.
Remember you have the right to be you.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Your best friend is a mirror. Other friends ask after you when you are standing right there. “Where are you?” They ask, “Why are you without your other self?” You two are the ingredients to make something brand new. You cannot unbake a cake. You can only slice. A knife is a mirror. A best friend can be a knife.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“Some Men Have Vaginas

He said he was a gay man
with a vagina and I, penis heavy
and light of foot, wondered
if gay meant the same to him
as it did to me, wondered
if man was in mind or body.
Because I wear my man,
strip down bare to my man.
In the mirror, there, I am.
For me, man has merely been
a matter of circumstance,
not a journey or discovery.
I rarely had to fight for it,
rarely want to fight against it,
never wanted to shed skin
to reveal somebody else.
I never questioned it until
he said, "Some men have vaginas."
I understood it to be true
but it left me feeling nothing
more than a tool, who knew
nothing about being a man
outside his own body.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I call myself black.
I call myself queer.
I call myself beautiful.
I call myself eternal.
I call myself iconic.
I call myself futuristic.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I wish we had more classes together. Maybe we would know each other better.
In drama we're always pretending to be someone else,
maybe that's school in general?”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“My own father


is not my dad. ”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“How to Come Out as Gay Don’t. Don’t come out unless you want to. Don’t come out for anyone else’s sake. Don’t come out because you think society expects you to. Come out for yourself. Come out to yourself. Shout, sing it. Softly stutter. Correct those who say they knew before you did. That’s not how sexuality works, it’s yours to define. Being effeminate doesn’t make you gay. Being sensitive doesn’t make you gay. Being gay makes you gay. Be a bit gay, be very gay. Be the glitter that shows up in unexpected places. Be Typing . . . on WhatsApp but leave them waiting. Throw a party for yourself but don’t invite anyone else. Invite everyone to your party but show up late or not at all. If you’re unhappy in the closet but afraid of what’s outside, leave the door ajar and call out. If you’re happy in the closet for the time being, play dress-up until you find the right outfit. Don’t worry, it’s okay to say you’re gay and later exchange it for something else that suits you, fits, feels better. Watch movies that make it seem a little less scary: Beautiful Thing, Moonlight. Be southeast London, a daytime dance floor, his head resting on your shoulder. Be South Beach, Miami, night of water and fire, your head resting on his shoulder. Be the fabric of his shirt the muscles in his shoulder, your shoulder. Be the bricks, be the sand. Be the river, be the ocean. Remember your life is not a movie. Accept you will be coming out for your whole life. Accept advice from people and sources you trust. If your mother warns you about STDs within minutes of you coming out, try to understand that she loves you and is afraid. If you come out at fifteen, this is not a badge of honor, it doesn’t matter what age you come out. Be a beautiful thing. Be the moonlight, too. Remember you have the right to be proud. Remember you have the right to be you.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“I'm ready to lose my virginity, loose doesn't sound right, It won't be an accident, how else can I say it? I'm ready to give him my virginity? Give doesn't sound right, I don't see it as a gift to him.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo

“They interrupt our joy. Our history. Our progress. They know they can’t stop us unless they kill us but they can’t kill us all, so you’re living your life and suddenly interrupted by white fear or suspicion. They fear sharing anything. Our success is a threat.”
― Dean Atta, The Black Flamingo