Minecraft Books Quotes

“Do you play basketball?” “Can you reach that for me?” “Where do you buy your clothes?” “How tall are you. . .really?” “You must hit your head, a lot.” “You have a booger in your nose.” And when you trip, somebody somewhere always yells, “Timber!!!” Now being taller than everybody else does have its perks. Like, I always get the best apples from the top of the tree. And when I’m tired, I can rest my elbows on people’s square heads.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Now, it is true that we can teleport. But we can’t teleport to the moon or anything like that.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“But that’s only because it probably looks better in our house than yours.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“poop”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Gets really annoying sometimes. Yeah, something tells me that nobody knows where Endermen come from. Now, a kid at school once told me that Creepers and Endermen actually came from a secret military experiment. They tried to make us into super soldiers and something went wrong. Like, Creepers were supposed to have explosion power. And Endermen were supposed to have teleportation and mind control powers. But Creepers ended up with stinky farts, and they randomly explode. And Endermen. . .well, we just stare out into space a lot and have sticky fingers.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Like farting and teleporting away before someone can blame it on us.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“I’ve also heard people say that we’re always staring at you. And I even heard people say that if you stare at us, we’ll melt your face off. Now, that’s not true. We just stare because we’re just really impressed at how perfectly square your head is in Minecraft. And about melting your face off. . .  Well, that only happens if you look at us funny. Now, it is true that we can teleport. But we can’t teleport to the moon or anything like that. The most we can teleport is only a few feet. Mostly, we just use it for really important stuff.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Villager kids are welcome to come to our school, though. But they usually don’t go because they feel kind of small. Only one Villager kid ever came to our school and graduated. He fit right in.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Slenderman.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Mosh”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“Enderman. You know, people don’t know much about Endermen. I think it’s because we’re naturally the strong, silent type. But because we’re so mysterious, people say some really crazy stuff about us. Like, people think that Enderman play basketball because we’re tall and have long arms. But it’s not true. We don’t play basketball. But if we did, we would kick your butts. Ha-Ha! Another thing people say is that we steal people’s stuff. Now, just because we move your block around doesn’t mean we’re stealing it.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!

“naturally the strong, silent type.”
― Pixel Kid, Minecraft Books: Diary of a Minecraft Enderman Book 1: Endermen Rule!