Two Kingdoms Quotes

“Jude finally pushes off, turns on his heel, and stalks out, yelling behind him, “I can’t handle her right now. Someone else make her stop being ridiculous so I can effectively yell at her some more!”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“You’d all really rather sleep in your own rooms because you’re mad at me, and suffer through those nightmares, than to have to share a bed with me? I thought you were simply being petty, but you must truly hate me to knowingly put yourselves through that,” I say on a strained whisper. “All because I wandered off to try and learn more about myself while the four of you plotted your own plan behind my back? Do you not see the hypocrisy, or do you just find my thoughts and needs to be completely irrelevant? Am I still really that insignificant?”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Someone should start answering,” Cain says, leaning up. “She’s got that crazy look in her eyes, and they’ll follow her lead. You’ve spent too long pissing them off.” Cain is officially my new favorite sibling. I recant that when he reaches down and scratches his balls with a firm look of concentration on his face. Man, with the effort he’s putting into that, they must really itch… I just threw up in my mouth.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“I hear something crash to the ground, something else shatter, and four angry Horsemen shouting very not nice words about me. “I’m going to fucking kill her myself, damn it!” “For fuck’s sake, she’s going to drive us all insane!” “When I get my hands on her…” “We need to find a way to chain her to the fucking house!” Sheesh. They act like they like me, but I think they’ve just missed threatening me.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“It’s like howler monkeys crawled up a gorilla’s ass and had a dinosaur baby that fucked a radioactive Godzilla… and had an even worse baby. If any of that makes sense.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Oh! Jewelry!” I say on a gasp as I dart to the shiny diamond necklace. “Someone reel her the fuck in before she cuts her face nuzzling that rock,” Kai says like he’s amused. But there are so many gems that I can’t look at all of them at once when I pull out a drawer. I fall back as the lights go out, my brain short-circuiting over all the shiny things.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Just so we’re clear…we’re going to walk in, fuck shit up, and walk out like the evil bosses we are, right?”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“What did Lucifer say?” Putting as much gravel in my voice as possible, I answer, “He said, ‘Paca, I am your father.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Romanian gypsy with her traveling harem,”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“It’s when he’s calm that he’s the scariest.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Why was I killed?”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“I creep out while they’re busy doing their sneaky thing and go do my own sneaky thing. You know… for balance.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“This is where you say, ‘but at least you’re pretty,’ like most judgmental men do after trying to make the woman sound like a horrible person,” I’m quick to say.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“I don’t need to be told twice to play my video games, it seems, because I’m already sliding down the next stripper pole.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“So when is it not too soon to point out that your ‘badass’ fight clothes are skirts?” I ask the guys, no longer interested in the gaping crowd around us who are still on their bellies. Four dry looks are my response. “Because that’s simply fascinating,” I go on, my grin only growing.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“You can all go back to your individual rooms and finish up the nightmare you like better than me.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“She felt guilty every time she enjoyed the wicked and terrible things they did to her.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“Then took out their payment on my body. Over. And over. And over.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“He’s grinning when my eyes come back to his. “So who was first this time? Just curious.” “That’s a completely inappropriate, personal question, and I’m so glad you asked,” I say, a little giddy as I sit up straighter, causing his smile to broaden.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“It’s like howler monkeys crawled up a gorilla’s ass and had a dinosaur baby that fucked a radioactive Godzilla…and had an even worse baby. If any of that makes sense.”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“The only Rafael I know is green, wears a pointless red mask on his eyes, and is a hero in a half shell,”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms

“He talks in circles like he's trying to be empowering and realistic at the same time. It comes out as a buzzkill self-righteous bunch of bullshit”
― Kristy Cunning, Two Kingdoms