I Am Watching You Quotes

“Because once you become a parent, you learn that love can involve more fear than you had ever imagined, and you never quite look on the world in the same way again.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Just a feeling that reminded him of a whole different time, a different version of himself.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“I read somewhere that by your forties you are supposed to care more about what you think of others than what they think of you –so why is it I am still waiting for this to kick in?”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“He knows that he should go to his wife –to help her, to console her –but he knows also that it will make no difference and so is putting it off. The truth? He wants just a little longer like this, looking out on the lawn. In this strange space, this addition to the house that has never really worked –always too hot or too cold, despite all the blinds and the big dust- magnet fan they had installed at ridiculous expense –he has managed somehow to drift into a state of semi- consciousness, a place in which his mind can roam beyond his body, beyond time, out into the garden where this very minute, in the early morning light, he is listening to them whispering in their den in the bushes. Anna and Jenny.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“striking, like a model or a member of a boy band. And it all reminds me of that very particular feeling in your tummy. You know. So I am not at all surprised or in the least bit disapproving when the men stand up and the good-looking one then leans over the top of the dividing seats, wondering if he might fetch the girls something from the buffet, ‘. . . seeing as I’m going?’ Next there are name swaps and quite”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“The problem with lying, he is learning, is that you have to remember the details of the lie. To make them match each time. Each new version is making it more difficult.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“A witness?’ ‘Yes. A woman on the train.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“have never forgotten the joy of learning to revive roses with fresh water and cutting the stems super sharp at an angle. The miracle of them lifting up their heads again as if saying thank you.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Because once you become a parent, you learn that love can involve more fear than you had ever imagined, and you never quite look on the world in the same way again. Which”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“again. Which is precisely why I cannot cope with my part in Anna’s disappearance.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“So often this past year I have wondered what exactly makes us the way we are. I don’t just mean the nature/nurture thing, I mean the sum of our personality and the decisions we make. All the thoughts that fire around our brain, even when we don’t want them to. How we handle the issues of conscience and responsibility. Why I blame myself when others wouldn’t.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Guilt, we all learn, has its own rules.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“when he was little, and I picture him bouncing and smiling. So happy. I tried so hard to comfort him last night, but I just couldn’t find the right words. And now I think of how close I came to being a grandmother and it is too much. Tears. No sound: just the sensation of wetness on my cheeks. I let myself cry while drinking my coffee, the saltiness of the tears running into my mouth and mixing with the drink, and then I shake my head and reach for tissues from my bag on the counter. I wipe my face, sniff and turn to look back at the flowers. Automatic pilot again. I dry my hands carefully on the towel by the sink and select double-sided ivory ribbon from the drawer – the expensive roll set aside for weddings – and the little packet of pearl pins. This bit needs real care. I lift the flowers from”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“some older people who need to sit down, Barb. We can’t put chairs out. I don’t want them to get too comfy or we’ll never get rid of them.’ ‘Oh, you’re being ridiculous.’ Henry is thinking that this is a fine time to call him ridiculous. He never wanted the stupid vigil. In bed last night they had another spit-whispered row about it. We could have it at the front of the house, Barbara had said when the vicar called by. Henry had quite explicitly said he would not support anything churchy – anything that would feel like a memorial service. But the vicar had said the idea of a vigil was exactly the opposite. That the community would like to show that they have not given up. That they continue to support the family. To pray for Anna’s safe return. Barbara was delighted and it was all agreed. A small event at the house. People would walk from the village, or park on the industrial estate and walk up the drive. ‘This was your idea, Barbara.’ ‘The vicar’s, actually. People just want to show support. That is what this is about.’ ‘This is ghoulish, Barb. That’s what this is.’ He moves the tractor across the yard again, depositing two more bales of straw alongside the others. ‘There. That should be enough.’ Henry looks across at his wife and is struck by the familiar contradiction. Wondering how on earth they got here. Not just since Anna disappeared, but across the twenty-two years of their marriage. He wonders if all marriages end up like this. Or if he is simply a bad man. For as Barbara sweeps her hair behind her ear and tilts up her chin, Henry can still see the full lips, perfect teeth and high cheekbones that once made him feel so very differently. It’s a pendulum that still confuses him, makes him wish he could rewind. To go back to the Young Farmers’ ball, when she smelled so divine and everything seemed so easy and hopeful. And he is wishing, yes, that he could go back and have another run. Make a better job of it. All of it. Then he closes his eyes. The echo again of Anna’s voice next to him in the car. You disgust me, Dad. He wants the voice to stop. To be quiet. Wants to rewind yet again. To when Anna was little and loved him, collected posies on Primrose Lane. To when he was her hero and she wanted to race him back to the house for tea. Barbara is now looking across the yard to the brazier. ‘You’re going to light a fire, Henry?’ ‘It will be cold. Yes.’ ‘Thank you. I’m doing soup in mugs, too.’ A pause then. ‘You really think this is a mistake, Henry? I didn’t realise it would upset you quite so much. I’m sorry.’ ‘It’s OK, Barbara. Let’s just make the best of it now.’ He slams the tractor into reverse and moves it out of the yard and back into its position inside the barn. There, in the semi-darkness, his heartbeat finally begins to settle and he sits very still on the tractor, needing the quiet, the stillness. It was their reserve position, to have the vigil under cover in this barn, if the weather was bad. But it has been a fine day. Cold but with a clear, bright sky, so they will stay out of doors. Yes. Henry rather hopes the cold will drive everyone home sooner, soup or no soup. And now he thinks he will sit here for a while longer, actually. Yes. It’s nice here alone in the barn. He finds”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Karl has served a sentence at Exeter prison for assault; Antony for theft.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“I pick those I watch very carefully. They need to be special. Sometimes I pick them because I love them and I know how much they need me, and sometimes I pick them because I hate them. I never pick anyone in-between. Why bother if you don’t feel strongly?”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“the pungent spill a neat tiny hill.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“once you become a parent, you learn that love can involve more fear than you had ever imagined, and you never quite look on the world in the same way again.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Sometimes people ask me, Why flowers, Ella? The truth is I cannot remember when life, for me, wasn’t about flowers. Right from when I was tiny and I used to collect wild flowers on walks with my gran, mesmerised by the colours and the scents and the way you could make the whole impact and mood change by combining them in different ways. The simple, joyful sunburst of a huge fistful of primroses, then the softening and mellowing effect if you added in just a few bluebells for the surprise, the contrast. The hint of the Mediterranean, with the blue and the yellow together.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Work when they have newborns . . .”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“That we are responsible for what we become now. Whether we fulfil our potential.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“It is so odd that you can stand in a space – a place in which you normally feel so happy and safe – and then suddenly you can stand in precisely the same spot and feel like this completely different person.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Of course, I really shouldn’t listen in on other people’s conversations. But it’s impossible not to on public transport, don’t you find? So many barking into their mobile phones while everyone else ramps up the volume to compete. To be heard.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“I have been lying in bed thinking about karma.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“I read somewhere that by your forties you are supposed to care more about what you think of others than what they think of you – so why is it I am still waiting for this to kick in?”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“It is so odd that you can stand in a space - a place in which you normally feel so happy and safe - and then suddenly you can stand in precisely the same spot and feel like this completely different person. I don't want to be this person. I hate this new person.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“to his wife – to help her, to console her – but he knows also that it will make no difference and so is putting it off. The truth? He wants just a little longer like this, looking out on the lawn. In”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Especially when they have experienced what you have. You need a fresh start, lovely. In my opinion, and it is just my opinion, you need the sun to come up.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“always get it so wrong with boys . . . with men, Lily.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You

“Best way to teach a child to swim is to throw ’em in the deep end.”
― Teresa Driscoll, I Am Watching You