Black Humour Quotes

“If you see me smiling, I'm probably thinking of doing something evil. If I’m laughing, I've already done it.”
― Adam Smith, Black Humour: (300 adult jokes, dirty jokes, ironic jokes and a lot of funny ridiculous jokes)

“The other night I was invited out for a night with the 'girls.' I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, 'I promise!' Well, the hours passed and the Blue Wkds went down way too easily. Around 3 a.m., a bit pissed, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hallway started up and cuckooed 3 times. Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him. (Even when totally smashed... 3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos MIDNIGHT!) The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, I told him 'MIDNIGHT'... he didn't seem pissed off in the least. Whew, I got away with that one! Then he said 'We need a new cuckoo clock.' When I asked him why, he said, 'Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said 'oh shit.' Cuckooed 4 more times, cleared its throat, cuckooed another three times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.”
― Adam Smith, Black Humour: (300 adult jokes, dirty jokes, ironic jokes and a lot of funny ridiculous jokes)

“I saw two kids fighting in the elementary school playground. Being the only adult around, I had to step in. They didn’t stand a chance.”
― Adam Smith, Black Humour: (300 adult jokes, dirty jokes, ironic jokes and a lot of funny ridiculous jokes)

“Patient: Oh doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation. Doctor: Don't worry. Mine too.”
― Adam Smith, Black Humour: (300 adult jokes, dirty jokes, ironic jokes and a lot of funny ridiculous jokes)