Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe Quotes

“Like the time Brianna accidentally threw away the little white bag that contained my double-chocolate, double-fudge cupcake. I’d actually JUST purchased it from the CupCakery. YES! I’ll admit I had to dig through the garbage to find it. And there was a big blob of jelly, a half-eaten fish stick, and slimy oatmeal stuck to the outside of the bag that looked pretty nasty. But the cupcake inside seemed okay, so I actually ATE it. . . .”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“exchange student’s name and gave me an e-mail address.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-so-secret Crush Catastrophe

“papai, é a sua vez!”, a Brianna falou.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Diário de uma garota nada popular – vol. 12

“Madame”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“Zoey,”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“Calling MacKenzie a MEAN GIRL is an understatement. She’s PURE EVIL in hair extensions and sparkly nail polish.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Dork Diaries: Crush Catastrophe

“finally realize your KNIGHT in shining ARMOR is really a LOSER in ALUMINUM FOIL!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Dork Diaries: Crush Catastrophe

“him.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“LOVE”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“IT’S IN MY BUSINESS! AGAIN!” I exclaimed. “PLEASE! KEEP YOUR NOSE OUT OF MY BUSINESS!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“MY DAD WANTS HELP WITH THE INTERWEB?”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-so-secret Crush Catastrophe

“Unfortunately, there is no known CURE. . . .”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-so-secret Crush Catastrophe

“André.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-so-secret Crush Catastrophe

“CRUSH”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Dork Diaries: Crush Catastrophe

“As soon as Dad and I got up from the table to leave, Mom shot us her evil sit-your-butts-back-down-if-you-know-what’s-good-for-you look.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-so-secret Crush Catastrophe

“Congratulations, MacKenzie!” and give her a high five! In the FACE. With a CHAIR! Just kidding ! NOT !”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“THAT BRATTY LITTLE THIEF HAD SNUCK INTO MY ROOM AND STOLEN MY ENTIRE STASH OF CANDY?!! “NO WAY!!” I protested. “I HATE this CRUDDY game. GIMME BACK MY CANDY, BRIANNA!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“When life gives MacKenzie LEMONS, she MALICIOUSLY squirts the juice in other people’s EYES!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“But the cupcake inside seemed okay, so I actually ATE it. . . .”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“CUTEST”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“So I reluctantly told him EVERYTHING! . . .”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“SATURDAY, MAY 31—11:15 P.M. IN MY BEDROOM Okay, I think this is probably going to be my LONGEST diary entry EVER! First of all, I didn’t have the slightest idea if Brandon was even going to show up at Queasy Cheesy.”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“Sorry, Nikki! You must be mistaking me for someone who actually CARES! Is your little bathroom DRAMA going to have an intermission soon? Because I need to pee!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“There was NO WAY we were just sitting there in the library like a bride and groom sharing a piece of wedding cake!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“My cell phone BATTERY lasts LONGER than your FRIENDSHIPS!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Dork Diaries: Crush Catastrophe

“So I’m definitely NOT going to sit around holding my BREATH, waiting for a FANTASY SUMMER IN PARIS to happen. WHY? Because LIFE is NOT a romantic comedy movie!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Dork Diaries: Crush Catastrophe

“As soon as I finished my last diary entry, I grabbed my books, stopped by André’s locker (hey, he’s part of my job duties!), and rushed straight to bio. But, unfortunately, I had arrived just seconds TOO LATE. . . . MACKENZIE SHOWS BRANDON THE PICS OF ANDRÉ AND ME! I just stood there FREAKING OUT as Brandon scrolled through the photos. He looked shocked, surprised, and hurt! All at the same time. . . . BRANDON LOOKS AT THE PICS! Right then all I wanted to do was dig a really deep hole right next to my desk, CRAWL into it, and DIE!! Once class started, I could practically feel Brandon staring at the back of my head. But whenever I turned around to make eye contact, he just gazed blankly at his bio book. Of course MacKenzie sat there with a big fat SMIRK on her face. She was SO proud of herself for pretty much DESTROYING my friendship with Brandon. I wanted to walk right up to her and say, “Congratulations, MacKenzie!” and give her a high five! In the FACE. With a CHAIR! Just kidding ! NOT ! Seriously! That girl is lucky I’m a very peaceful and nonviolent person. I just totally ignored her when she started EYEBALLING me all EVIL-LIKE. . . . MACKENZIE,”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“By guess who?! . . . MacKenzie !! “So, it must be a family business trip? I didn’t know Paris had a ROACH problem!” she giggled. Okay, yeah. My dad owns a bug extermination business. Big hairy deal! But why did girlfriend have to start tossing NASTY insults? I wasn’t even TALKING to her ! That’s when I suddenly stared at MacKenzie in horror. “OMG!! MACKENZIE!! IT’S YOUR . . . NOSE!!” I gasped. “I can’t believe it. Your NOSE!” She immediately panicked and touched her nose. “WHAT’S WRONG WITH MY NOSE?!” “IT’S IN MY BUSINESS! AGAIN!” I exclaimed. “PLEASE! KEEP YOUR NOSE OUT OF MY BUSINESS!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“No problem! I’m really looking forward to us hanging out. It’s going to be fun!” “Well, Daisy loves hanging out with YOU!” I said. That’s when Brandon STARED right into the . . . murky depths of my . . . inner soul. Then he smiled kind of shy-like and brushed his shaggy bangs out of his eyes. I thought I was going to MELT!”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-So-Secret Crush Catastrophe

“fizzles”
― Rachel Renée Russell, Tales from a Not-so-secret Crush Catastrophe