American Tango Quotes

“And who would advocate for her? Who would arrange her doctor appointments and throw out rotting bananas as she drifted into old age? Who would keep her photos, her jewelry, her horrible shadowboxes full of undergraduate angst, her hummingbird paintings, or even her tango shoes? Who would care about all the random junk she accumulated over the years and the stories that had attached to them?”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“OK! Let's get started," Mariela announced brightly. "Now, can anyone tell me the meaning of 'tango'--the actual word?"

Helen, of course, knew. "In Latin, it means 'I touch."

Mariela nodded emphatically. "'I touch.' Or 'I play.' As in playing an instrument only here our instrument is ourselves," Mariela paused, allowing this insight to sink in. "And it means, 'I touch. I touch my partner in embrace," Dan and Mariela faced each other in an opening stance, "also called an abrazo--" and danced a simple eight step.

"And I touch my inner life. I touch the core of my essence. Tango is not just learning or following steps."

"It's improvisation," Barry said in a deep baritone.

"That's right. There's a saying that tango is a 'sad thought danced.' But that's only part of it. It's touching the sadness in you, the pain, yes--but also the joy, the humor, the everything life has. It's touching everything.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“Listen. The world doesn't need any more babies. What is needs are women who don't spend all their time beating themselves up over shit they don't control.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“That's just how it is. You get halfway through your life and realize you've done it all wrong. You've picked the wrong jobs and followed the wrong dreams. Every decision from your cradle to the counter of an upscale children's boutique in Portland, Oregon gratingly names little fig where you now stand tethered at the age of thirty-seven for thirteen-dollars-an-hour-plus-commission has been all wrong.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“Richard and I always called you the punisher. We never had to discipline you. Not like we did Hermione or Polly. Because you were so hard on yourself. If there's anything I want for you now, as a mother, even if I don't 'deserve' it is: I want you to be gentle. I want you to have compassion. For yourself and everyone. It's what every parent wants. If their any good. Which maybe I wasn't...”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“Rosalind knew she was right, knew there was something even deeper that prevented her from going back. Since she began something had always bothered her about tango: she still had no idea how people knew what the hell they were doing. The dance had no agreed upon formula, no designated rules, just collectively shared sequences that a leader could use interchangeably. It was a conversation, not a speech. This was what was so allegedly wonderful about it: it was an improvisation, a negotiation between two people. No choreography, no predetermined pattern, just endless unpredictable new formations. One couldn't dominate the other. It was--if not historically, at least ideally--a dance of equals. This struck her a lovely in principle and crazy-making in practice. How do you know what to do? "The man will lead you," her teachers told her. What if his lead doesn't make sense? "It will. Practice," Mariela had instructed brightly, unhelpfully.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“After she packed her few bags into the back of her car and hugged him, Rosalind never saw him again. After a few weeks it was like she'd never known him at all, like summer friendships she'd strike up as a child when the family stayed a few weeks at the beach or another city. The friendship was site specific. She couldn't miss it any more than she'd miss the Eiffel Tower in her backyard. It was where it belonged, somewhere in the past.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“He turned to her and smiled. "OK. And you paint. Men come and go," he said, wagging a finger. "Be good to yourself. What you have? Inside? That's permanent. Any man doesn't see that, doesn't deserve you.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“And the horrible thing was: what if they were right? What if she lived her whole life and never really knew what love was? What if it was deeper than she ever imagined? What if she died without ever knowing what she missed? How would she know to even miss it? Love--deep, profound, soul-stirring love--happened on this planet, in this life. And she missed it.

On the other hand, her mother had a point: babies were awful. They were selfish, greedy, expensive and ultimately resentful of what they later would decide you had withheld from them. You were, in effect, creating someone uniquely fine-tuned to discern your slightest faults and broadcast them from the highest point.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“you really got to do it--it's like you don't know what love is until you have a kid.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“The woman danced with an economy of motion Rosalind had noted among the very talented. There was always something self-contained about the better dancers; they held something in reserve, a restraint formed mysteriously by something they'd given up opposing. This surrender made the dancers beautiful. Rosalind had noticed it from the first, the way that skill reordered things; skill altered the economy of beauty so that this woman with a face like an old spoon would be the one men wanted to dance with all night. The dance and her skill made her desirable. She moved with a calm dignity as though it never occurred to her that someone wouldn't want to dance with her.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“They didn't talk the way new lovers often do, sharing everything; they were selective and wary. Sometime it seemed to her their relationship was mostly physical, something she enjoyed.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“How could she love someone she barely knew? A year ago she would have said it was impossible: love was a choice people made daily and longevity was its measure. Love did not crash land in your living room leaving you squinting into daylight, picking through the debris of your former life. Only now could she see that it was sometimes a phantom thing, a stray that wandered the periphery of your life and moved in the minute you opened the door for who knew how long?”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“How had it escaped her, Rosalind wondered. How had she never appreciated that her mother was a human being with her own desires and disappointments?”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“Their dancing was simple and expert and reminded her of something one of her art teachers told her about bad artists taking something simple and making it seem complicated while good artists took something very complex and made it seem simple. The couple was an illustration of this rule; the dance seemed barely to qualify for the term--in essence they seemed merely to be walking, slowly in lockstep. They would stop occasionally, the woman led into a simple ocho and then resume their slow, meditative procession. They seemed, to Rosalind's untrained eye, to be under a spell.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“But now she regarded her sister with curious distance. She'd been so actively excluded from everything important to her she felt suddenly, intensely alone.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“She realized children shouldn't be thought of as mere post-mortem media storage sites, but really, where on earth was she going to unload all her earthly crap if not upon someone biologically required to care?”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“It's the worst feeling," she said staring off vaguely, lost in another decade, "it's really the most shattering moment when you stop being enchanting to someone else. You're suddenly,,,just this person. And so is he.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“They smiled awkwardly and hugged again. Rosalind thought briefly to ask when they'd stopped being necessary to each other, when she had become another obligation to fill like their parents or Polly.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“Remember the good times---you'll need them during the bad," a family friend had boozily warned her at their wedding.”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango

“The Friday afternoon of a teenager--had anything more wonderful existed?”
― Jennifer Vandever, American Tango