The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld Quotes

“Did I hear things, or can that little dog speak?” said Dibbler. “He says he can’t,” said Victor. Dibbler hesitated. “Well,” he said, “I suppose he should know.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“What is your name?” he said. “My name is immaterial,” she said. “That’s a pretty name,” said Rincewind.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“William wondered why he always disliked people who said “no offense meant.” Maybe it was because they found it easier to say “no offense meant”than actually refrain from giving offense.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“Ptraci didn’t just derail the train of thought, she ripped up the rails, burned the stations, and melted the bridges for scrap.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“allegro ma non troppo.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit And Wisdom Of Discworld

“I mean, if a poet sees a daffodil he stares at it and writes a long poem about it, but Twoflower wanders off to find a book on botany. And treads on it.   Then”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“But our guest, whose name is legend, must tell us truly: what is it that a man may call the greatest things in life?” The warriors leaned closer. This should be worth hearing. The guest thought long and hard and then said, with deliberation: “Hot water, good dentishtry and shoft lavatory paper.”   [He”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“Those who are inclined to casual cruelty say that inside a fat girl is a thin girl and a lot of chocolate.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“There is a type of girl who, while incapable of cleaning her bedroom even at knifepoint, will fight for the privilege of being allowed to spend the day shoveling manure in a stable.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“Never trust a dog with orange eyebrows.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld

“When you became a wizard you were expected to stop shaving and grow a beard like a gorse bush. Very senior wizards looked capable of straining nourishment out of the air via their mustaches, like whales.”
― Terry Pratchett, The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld