And Another Thing... Quotes

“There is no such thing as a happy ending. Every culture has a maxim that makes this point, while nowhere in the Universe is there a single gravestone that reads 'He Loved Everything About His Life, Especially the Dying Bit at the End'.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“The Hitchhiker's Guide is a hundred percent accurate. Reality, however, is not as reliable.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“As a child, Zaphod had been diagnosed with ADHDDAAADHD (ntm) ABT which stood for Always Dreaming His Dopey Days Away, Also Attention Deficit Hyperflactulance Disorder (not to mention) A Bit Thick.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“I wear a name tag to help people find me. It saves time when you're dealing with idiots.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Miss me? Bet you did ... so would I.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“You display inordinate pride for someone who has completed a task which could have been performed by a lesser primate in a shorter time.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Hey, if you can't remember, don't worry about it. I'm having a few memory problems myself in this place. Little things like how long I've been here, what my purpose in life is, which feet to put my shoes on. Stuff like that.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Anything can be real. Every imaginable thing is happening somewhere along the dimensional axis. These things happen a billion times over with exactly the same outcome and no one learns anything. Whatever a person can think, imagine, wish for, or believe has already come to pass. Dreams come true all the time, just not for the dreamers.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“People like me, LB, the truly great ones ... we are always alone.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Most craft give a nod, however brief and unfriendly, towards beauty. Vogon ships did not nod towards beauty. They pulled on ski masks and mugged beauty in a dark alley They spat in the eye of beauty and bludgeoned their wait through the notions of aesthetics and aerodynamics. Vogon cruisers did not so much travel through space as defile it and toss it aside.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“This planet has—or rather had—a problem, which was this: most of the people living on it were unhappy for pretty much all of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movement of small green pieces of paper, which was odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Hexagonal Phase

“Life', said Marvin, 'don't talk to me about life”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Hexagonal Phase

“Mortals, screw ’em.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Probably is absolutely the best I can do.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“It is a universal maxim that if someone goes to the trouble of printing something on a T-shirt, then it is almost definitely not a hundred percent untrue, which is to say that it is more than likely fairly definitely not altogether false.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“If they don't keep on exercising their lips, he thought, their brains start working.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy: Hexagonal Phase: And Another Thing...

“Dreams come true all the time, just not for the dreamers.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“I like to be loved, he thought, but he did not voice the notion”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“...aslında bütün marifet kendini yere doğru fırlatıp yeri ıskalamakta yatar.

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'Cennet bahçesi. ağaç. elma. o ısırık, hatırlıyor musun?'

'Evet, elbette hatırlıyorum.'

'Sizin tanrınız, bir bahçenin ortasına bir elma ağacı koyar ve der ki, 'hey arkadaşlar ne isterseniz yapın, ama bu elmayı yemeyin.' sürpriz, sürpriz, elmayı yerler ve o da saklandığı çalının arkasından fırlayarak bağırır 'yakaladım, yakaladım.'oysa yemeselerdi de sonuçta bir şey değişmeyecekti.'

'Niye değişmesin?'

'Çünkü eğer karşındaki, kaldırıma içinde tuğla bulunan şapkaları bırakmaktan hoşlanan bir zihniyete sahipse, gayet iyi bilirsin ki bundan vazgeçmez, er ya da geç seni gafil avlar.'

'Sen neden söz ediyorsun?'

'Boş ver, meyveyi ye”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Hexagonal Phase

“Adamın birinin, değişiklik olsun diye bundan böyle halka nazik davranmanın ne kadar iyi olacağını dile getirdiği için bir ağaca çivilenmesinden yaklaşık iki bin yıl sonra, bir perşembe günü, rickmanswort'de küçük bir kafede tek başına oturan bir kız, bunca zamandır ters giden şeyin ne olduğunu birden fark edip en sonunda dünyanın nasıl iyileştirilebileceğini ve mutluluğun hüküm sürdüğü bir yere dönüştürülebileceğini anlamıştı. bu sefer doğru olanı bulmuştu, işe yarayacak ve hiç kimsenin bir yerlere çivilenmesi gerekmeyecekti.
Ama ne yazıktır ki, bir telefon bulup birilerine bundan söz edemeden korkunç aptal bir felaket meydana geldi ve fikir sonsuza dek yitip gitti.
bu, o kızın öyküsü değil.
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varlıgımı kanıtlamayı reddediyorum" der tanrı. "cünkü kanıt inancı yok eder. ve inanç olmazsa ben bir hiçim.
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Halkı yönetmeyi en çok isteyenler, bunu yapmaya en az uygun olanlardır.
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- keske annemi dinleseydim
+nelerden bahsederdi ki
- bilmem hic dinlemedim

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Tanrım beni bilmem gerekmeyen şeyleri öğrenmekten koru. Hatta beni bilmediğim şeyler olduğunu öğrenmekten de koru. Öğrenmemeye karar verdiğim şeyler olduğunu öğrenmemeye karar verdiğimi bilmekten koru. Amin.
Tanrım, tanrım, tanrım.. Beni yukarıdaki duanın sonuçlarından koru.
Amin.
Yaşamda insanların başına gelen şeylerin çoğu bu son kısmı kaçırmış olmaktan dolayı başlarına geliyor.
-----”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Hexagonal Phase

“Maybe you read my article in WooHoo?"

"I never read press. You start believing it, you see...”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Guide Note: Technically, there were no aliens on the ship, just space travellers. As soon as the ‘alien’s’ identity is revealed we can abandon that classification.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Zeka ve geleceği görme yeteneğiyle donatılmış birçok asansörün düşünmeyi gerektirmeyen ve yalnızca yukarı çıkıp aşağı inmekten ibaret bu iş yüzünden müthiş bir bunalıma girmesi de gayet normaldi, sonuçta varoluşçu bir tepki olarak, kısa bir süre için yanlamasına gitmeyi denediler, karar verme sürecinde rol almayı talep ettiler ve son olarak da suratlarını asıp bodrum katında oturma grevine başladılar.
Bugünlerde Sirius yıldız sistemindeki gezegenlerin herhangi birini ziyaret eden ve parasız her otostopçu bu nevrotik asansörlere danışmanlık görevi yaparak kolayca para kazanabilir.”
― Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Hexagonal Phase

“The cow spat. “What are you going to do? Not eat me?” “That’s right. I won’t eat you and I won’t eat your entire family. Wherever they hide, I’ll find them and not eat a single bite.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“I have lived long enough to realize that there is no such thing as perfect love. That's too long.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“But then what were physical feelings if not more electrical messages from the brain? Why believe in them either? Was there anything trustworthy in the Universe that one could hug and hold on to in the midst of a butterfly storm, other than a Hawaliusian wind staunch?”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Love can be a noun or a verb.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“There are worse things to see than nothing. Nothingness, for example.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“The natural order was falling apart and all sorts of people were beginning to consider themselves equal to those who obviously were equal, which is not what religion was about at all.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...

“Zaphod Says Yes to Zaphod was probably the most famous T-shirt slogan, though not even his team of psychiatrists understood what it actually meant. Second favorite was probably Beeblebrox. Just be glad he’s out there.”
― Eoin Colfer, And Another Thing...