Bite Me Quotes

“I’ve always thought that every person who chooses to breed their pet, intentionally or not, should spend one day in a humane shelter helping to euthanize the animals who are out of time. That might cure their need to have a litter because it is “such a good dog,” or because they want their children to experience the birthing process, or because their pet is papered, or because they want a little extra pocket money. Being sweet or loving or gentle are not good enough reasons to breed a dog. Perhaps witnessing the endless number of animals who are euthanized, many who are registered or papered or who once had loving homes, will cure their need to bring more animals into this overpopulated world.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“I wanted them to see how veterinarians, who are not given any special training in grief or trauma counseling, deal with extreme emotions and situations at a frequency and intensity that few other professions in the world ever have to do.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“I learned that people who have a lot of strength will mask what is going on until they become so severely depressed that they are not functioning.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“The truth is that I am no happier than the surgeons that they have to drive into the hospital at some crazy hour of the night to perform a surgery on my shift. Their angry demeanor and actions would upset me and my night staff. Just come in here and do your job, is what I wanted to say to them, and stop screaming at me for doing my job.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“Snakes are one of my least favorite creatures in the world, but I was still aghast to see that the snake charmers, so popular in the Moroccan tourist markets, sewed the mouths of the cobras shut. This surgery was performed as a safety precaution to prevent the snakes from biting the snake handlers and the onlookers, but it also prevented the hapless reptiles from eating.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“the mammals we had to be the wariest of were of the species called Homo sapiens.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“And that is why there are potbellied, malnourished children and adults in the world, while the majority of American dogs and cats are obese. And that is why some people can ventilate their dying dog, while elsewhere, children in destitute countries die from diabetes.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“At the residence of my first veterinary job in New England, I passed by the surgery suite just in time to see my boss pulling a long stretch of a cassette tape out of a dog’s intestine. “What in the world would entice him to eat this?” he muttered. He then rationalized a plausible explanation to himself which did not necessitate my reply. “It must be country music. Nothing else could possibly be worth the agony of all of this,” he mumbled continuing to pull loops and loops of tape from the dog’s inflamed intestines.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“Sometimes it is not until after the animal has snapped at me that the owner will decide to mention that the dog has a history of biting. Since owners never want to believe that their dog could hurt someone, they are reluctant to have a muzzle placed on their pet. This is one of the few things that really upsets me.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“Don’t worry he would never bite,” owners will tell me with confidence as Fluffy “smiles” at me with his teeth bared. Great then you go and put your face near a stranger’s snarling dog and see if you would trust that person’s assessment of whether or not their dog will not bite you, is the response that circles through my mind.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“Here we go again. One moment I’m a veterinarian simply trying to treat a dog’s diarrhea and the next minute, without any provocation, I become their confidante emerged in the torrid details of my client’s life.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“Veterinarians have recently been identified at the top of a list of professionals who are most likely to commit suicide.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian

“My daily work can also involve doing some of the most vile and disgusting things imaginable, things that I am usually hoping no one I know well will ever find out about.”
― Laura C. Lefkowitz, Bite Me: Tell-All Tales of an Emergency Veterinarian