Tattered Remnants Quotes

“Women are smarter.” “Well, I mean, I know that. I guess I just didn’t realize how much more.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I cannot tell you how fucking brutal it is to constantly shove your foot into your own mouth. Although you’d think after how many times I’d done it, I would have stretched it out by now. “It’s hard being this big of an ass,” I said as I let my head hang low.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“A spider can practice looking cuddly its entire life; still not going to change anything.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I was still trying to get my adrenaline levels down to an acceptable level. If a cop gave me a sobriety test right now, I would look like a meth addict in the midst of a giant tweaking.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I’m not happy about this, Mike.” The truck dipped down as he got back in. “When’s the last time you were happy?” “The minute before I met you and every minute before that.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“It’s strange to me that we put so much significance into material gains, but then again, it’s not. Men, at least, chase wealth because wealth brings a mate. And there it is, the root of all evil isn’t money, it’s women.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“Happiness, Michael. I gave that first man a small sliver of happiness for what he gazed upon. Had I known how things would turn out, I would have never done so. If we’re being honest it was a female gazing upon a fruit. So there is some truth to the original Adam and Eve story, though she was not tempted, the gift was given to her without her knowledge or consent really. I wonder if she knew the cost, would she still have accepted?” “Happiness? Not free will?” “No, that came later and was born from that fateful decision of mine.” He looked sad, immensely so. “How could something like that cause you such misery?”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I knew there was going to be a problem when one of the first priests said there were certain ways that I must be loved and all other ways were wrong. It has been a long dark road since. The garden was a wonderful time. It was not quite the fairy tale it has been shown to be. Men and women still died. Life was a constant struggle. Yet it was beautiful in its innocence. I suppose in the end it was all my fault.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I better not get Lyme disease. That’s a hiking-honky sickness…. Oh, let’s see nature and catch some parasites!”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“A spider can practice looking cuddly its entire life; still not going to change anything. I can’t believe you’re trying to kill me.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“Kids are nearly insane. Doubt me? Think of all the asinine things they do. What won’t they put in their mouths? What won’t they dive off of? What situations won’t they put themselves in? Why do you think parents go prematurely gray or bald? Because it takes a lot of effort to keep crazy Cathy and insane Isaac from running into traffic with nothing more on than a pair of wet diapers and sand pails on their heads.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“Men, at least, chase wealth because wealth brings a mate. And there it is, the root of all evil isn’t money, it’s women.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“right next to that would be a blissful box of wipes. I needed those fucking wipes bad, like a heroin addict needs a fix, like a fat kid needs a cupcake, like a skinny person needs a salad, like a white girl needs a pumpkin spice latte.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“Frigging irony is a bitch, nope wait, it’s karma that’s a bitch. So what’s that make irony? An asshole, perhaps?”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“does one deal with the accumulation of loss? It is a cold, heavy feeling that settles into the bottom of your heart where it grows sharp barbs that take root and will not release its icy grip. It slowly chokes your system, making even the most basic and simplest of tasks brutally difficult.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“The storm doesn’t follow you; you are the storm. Nothing can stand in your way.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“To need help is to imply weakness. When weakness is perceived, it is believed you are soft. When people think of you as soft, they will run roughshod over you.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I wondered if he had a tally, and if he did … did I want to know? He said “things” and not people. Had he perhaps killed an elephant? A narwhal? Maybe even a yeti?”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“You could do this every day for the next ten years and you still would not have killed as many things as I have.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“Every fucking year I would do it, thinking that this year it would be different. Pretty sure that’s the definition of insanity; good thing I barely know how to read.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“Passagassawakeag River. Yeah, I sure as shit didn’t make that up. Means something like, “You fish on your side and I’ll fish on mine.” Even the Native Americans weren’t too fond”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“I better not get Lyme disease. That’s a hiking-honky sickness….”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“what better way to hide a predatory evilness than through a mask of magnificence?”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants

“that was as empty as a box of tissues in a teenage boy’s room. Do with that what you will; some kids have allergies.”
― Mark Tufo, Tattered Remnants