The Office Rival Quotes

“Promises are just promises, made to be broken if they are built on lies. Not”
― Kat T. Masen, #Jerk

“Tea was coffee’s bitch.”
― Kat T. Masen, #Jerk

“Honey, the only pussy you have is the one currently filling up with cobwebs.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“Tonight, I want to curl up with a good book and visit my fictional boyfriends. Now let me tell you, my list is long. I am the equivalent to Hugh Hefner, but instead of bunnies I have this ever-growing list of male characters that have stolen my heart. I”
― Kat T. Masen, #Jerk

“It’s telling me that love is a constant battle. The man who steals my heart… I want him to fight for me. I want to be the only woman he thinks about, the only woman his heart beats for. I want to be the object of his desire, the body he worships every day. I want to feel like nothing in this world exists if he doesn’t feel all those things for me.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“She makes it impossible to hate anything about her. At least if she had a giant mole on her nose and a long chin, I could refer to her as a witch.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“I can’t take my eyes off the bush. You could run a brush through it and style it with cornrows, it’s that long.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“Uh, because he stuck his GI Joe in your Polly Pocket?”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“I stuck to my five-month-rule, minus four months, two weeks, and four days. Turns out the older you get, the shorter the timespan.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“Nevertheless, I started packing my belongings and getting rid of items I no longer need like my MC Hammer pants from the nineties. There’s nostalgia, and then there is just plain hoarding. Hammer pants fall into the hoarding category though my mother would argue that in a heartbeart.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“Talk about loose lips, and I don’t mean the ones on her face.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“The only connection you had was when he stuck his pecker in your bird hole.”
― Kat T. Masen, The Office Rival

“If you’re pissed off at someone you throw a martini in their face, or bash them on social media. You don’t fuck them in the alley!” I”
― Kat T. Masen, #Jerk

“I think he does. No offense, Clive, but women don’t want to read about men getting hot and heavy. They want alpha billionaires breaking their virginity.” “Why”
― Kat T. Masen, #Jerk

“I happened to be wearing my big-girl panties (often referred to as Aunt Flo’s couture)”
― Kat T. Masen, #Jerk