The OMG Test Quotes

“Don’t look back with tears, look forward with joy; and grab every bit of happiness you can. Don’t waste your life being afraid to try new things, and don’t be afraid of rejection, be afraid of rejecting what you know is right, in your heart.”
― Pippa Franks, The OMG Test

“TOILET SEAT TROUBLE ELIMINATOR’ ‘Your troubles are over, guys. How many times have you been in trouble for leaving the toilet seat up? Stay in the good books with this device. Simply attach it to the back of the toilet seat, and each time it’s lifted, it will gently close after three minutes. To earn an extra gold star, attach the special wiper, and it will run over the seat and clean up any spills and splashes you’ve made, before closing.”
― Pippa Franks, The OMG Test

“Olivia climbed down the steps gingerly. Her body tensed as the water lapped around her. Melissa swam past her with a look of disgust, so she counted to three and submerged her body. Her shoulders were now underwater, and a lady of generous proportions chose that moment to flop into the water next to Olivia. She gasped and spat the water out of her mouth. She may as well have just asked for a ‘cup of bleach please.’ It would’ve tasted the same, but she’d have been a lot warmer.”
― Pippa Franks, The OMG Test

“Do you drive, Olivia?’ Connor started the engine. ‘Only people mad. I took a test a few years ago. The examiner said I changed gears as if I was making a cake. I’m not sure what he meant though, I don’t bake.’ ‘I see,’ said Connor. ‘And he failed you on that?’ ‘No, there was an incident, I nearly ran a lollipop lady over.”
― Pippa Franks, The OMG Test

“What do you think of the new signing from France?”
― Pippa Franks, The OMG Test