First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors Quotes

“It’s not helpful for your connection with your husband to discuss with him your hurt or scared feelings about him, but your feelings do deserve airtime. So make sure to honor and express those feelings somewhere else. The more you preserve the intimacy in your marriage by avoiding comments that are disrespectful to or critical of your husband, the less you’re going to have those hurtful moments. You’ll be too busy laughing together and holding hands.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“If you spend time taking care of yourself instead of him, you're more likely to be receptive, grateful, and happy.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“Receiving is the ultimate act of giving up control.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“Your husband really wants you to be happy. When you’re happy, he feels successful as a husband and as a man. No matter how bad things are in the relationship, your husband’s desire to make you happy is alive and well. If it doesn’t seem like that right now, that’s because when you’re in conflict or a cold war, your husband’s need to defend himself will supersede his drive to please you. But as soon as he feels respected again, he’ll be looking for any chance to delight you. The more he knows about what will make you happy, the easier it will be for him to feel successful as a husband. That’s why it’s so important for you to know your desires and express them clearly. If your husband knows how to make you happy, he can do something about it—and then you’re both happy. That’s why it’s important to take your own happiness seriously. If mama’s not happy, nobody’s happy.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“If there’s a lot of tension and distance at your house, you might ask yourself if there’s something you’ve done that’s disrespectful. If so, you have the opportunity to apologize and restore the intimacy. When the intimacy in your relationship is gone, it’s almost always an indication that the respect is missing too. You might be surprised at how quickly you can get both back with a simple apology.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“These are the four magical questions to help you decide whether you’d rather act on your fear or choose your faith.   1.  What am I afraid of?   2.  Is my fear realistic?   3.  Can I actually control the situation?   4.  Is it worth the intimacy it would cost me to try to control?”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“In every marriage more than a week old, there are grounds for divorce. The trick is to find, and continue to find, grounds for marriage.” —Sir Robert Anderson, Author”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“My husband is smart enough to notice me trying to control him like I'm his boss or his mother—instead of his lover—no matter how clever my wording.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“When you let down your guard, the truth comes out in an endearing way. You feel the incomparable pleasure and joy of being loved just as you are, not for who you think you should be.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life

“Now it's no longer my goal to be independent. What I want is to be interdependent with my husband.”
― Laura Doyle, First, Kill All the Marriage Counselors: Modern-Day Secrets to Being Desired, Cherished, and Adored for Life