How my Gay Uncle F'ed up Christmas Quotes

“I know this: I'm tired of being held down under the water while some stranger tries to choke the evil out of me. If I'm evil, I'm going to be the best evil I can be. Oh,”
― Nicholas Black, How my Gay Uncle F'ed up Christmas: The Legend of Sodomy Cat

“At that time, I didn't have any idea what an electric, water-cooled, 220-volt, anal plug was. And I'd definitely never seen one of those things covered in smurf-blue rubber with rectal-pleasure nubs. I was still just a rookie to all of this.”
― Nicholas Black, How my Gay Uncle F'ed up Christmas: The Legend of Sodomy Cat