Texas Tornado Quotes

“When a woman says “What,” it’s not because she didn’t hear you, it’s because she’s giving you a chance to amend your answer.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“You can tell a woman’s mood by watching her hands. For instance, if she’s holding a gun, she’s probably angry.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“After watching copious amounts of crime shows, I concluded that serial killers only target young attractive women with matching panty and bra sets. I feel much safer now.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“Roses are red, Foxes are clever. I like your butt, let me touch it forever. -Redneck Love Poem”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“Teach your girl to shoot, because a restraining order is just a piece of paper. -Life”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“Our flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies with the last breath of each soldier who died protecting it.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“You can tell a woman’s mood by watching her hands. For instance, if she’s holding a gun, she’s probably angry. -Earl Dibbles, Jr.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“I want to impart on you some wisdom that I’ve learned. The world is not a very nice place. There are people in this world who will constantly bring you down. However, there are also people in this world that will help raise you up. Make you a person that you are proud to be. You will find, many times in your life, things do not go your way. During those times, I want you to take a step back, and analyze the situation. I want you to notice, not only with your eyes, but also with all your other senses, the root of the situation. I want you to be aware. I want you to be prepared. And I want you to be forgiving. The world can use more forgiveness.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“When he was about a foot away from my face, I thrust the dick in the air like a goddamn sword, and brought it down across his face, smacking him so hard in the face that he literally fell backwards, back hitting the ground like a ton of bricks. I didn’t waste time in staring at him though. I wielded my two-foot dick like The Rock in Walking Tall, and started beating the absolute shit out of him.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“I’m scared of walking out of this room, and never feeling the rest of my whole life, the way I feel when I’m with you.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“There are many things I’ve learned over the years by being a father of three and that was that a strong hand was needed. To hold my beer. Or on those rare occasions, sometimes even whiskey. Because when you live in a household of women, something’s got to take the edge off. Otherwise, a man, such as myself, would go crazy.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado

“Today was a big day for her. It was life changing. And life changing events make you realize what you do and don’t have any longer.”
― Lani Lynn Vale, Texas Tornado