Embarrassing True Stories Quotes

“Dingleberries:”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, Embarrassing True Stories

“me.  ”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, Embarrassing True Stories

“TEDDY BEAR RAPIST   When I was a kid, I used to masturbate by lying on my stomach, and basically I humped my teddy bear. After a few months, he was covered in little dried cum stains. I hid him in my closet, so my mom wouldn't see him like that.   One day she was cleaning my room, and while she was getting some fresh sheets out of my closet, she found my teddy bear, hidden under some clothes I had thrown over him. She picked him up, examined him, and then asked me: "What happened to your teddy bear? Have you been blowing your nose on him?”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, Embarrassing True Stories

“my wife how”
― Oliver Gaspirtz, Embarrassing True Stories