Kamikaze Kangaroos! Quotes

“I’ve always loved climbing trees, so when the Track passed right by one of Australia’s biggest it was impossible to resist.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: 20,000 Miles Around Australia. One Van, Two Girls... And an Idiot.

“Does anyone know where the hell Old Zealand is? Well, unless it’s amazing, the New version is way better. Okay, I just found out: it’s in Holland.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“sneaking into our room when we were out, to go through our bins before we emptied them. She’d leave the evidence next to my pillow, with little Post-it notes saying, “Hi! Just popped in to check on something, and found these in your bin. Don’t forget to recycle!” It wasn’t a horse’s head, but it was pretty fucking close.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“giving me that look that means ‘please stop talking’. She uses that look a lot. But it works. Sometimes.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Strange, isn’t it, how such small events in your past can make a big difference in your future?”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“5:30am is a fairly magical time the world over; almost everything is quiet, like the calm before the storm; nothing seems the same, caught in the half-light of dawn, and devoid of the chaos normally associated with the waking world. But I’ve seen all that shit. And I’d still rather be in bed.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“You can’t even bring crossbows into Australia. Something to do with them being made of untreated wood. They confiscate the bloody things at the airport. The bastards!”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Safety standards in Bali weren’t quite the same as those in the western world, something I’m usually quite excited about.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Bali is to Australians what Ibiza is to twelve blokes from Blackpool on a stag do – one long, rowdy, epically-cheap piss-up.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“every country has pest animals – but it’s not often that they’re bigger than we are. Or that they outnumber us – thirty-four million roos, against the twenty-three million-strong population of Australia.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“I’ve read books where someone is described as a ‘bear of a man’. I always picture an excessively hairy, thick-bearded fella dressed in a full-length pelt like a Viking.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“You know you’ve been travelling with someone for too long when you can read their “OH SHIT!” body language even though you’re sitting behind them. Gill’s head and neck went suddenly stiff, which can’t have been healthy, given the terrain we were bouncing over. “But…” her mental gears were spinning so frantically I could almost smell them burning. “But… Lauren… you’re not American, are you?” “I SURE AM!” Lauren sounded a little indignant, but that was all. “Oh!” said Gill, “Sorry! We all thought you were Canadian!” And somehow, unbelievably, she’d pulled it off.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Any fan of Douglas Adams can tell you, when setting off on an adventure such as this, you must always know where your towel is.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Australians suffer from a pathological inability to use complete naming-words, and must shorten everything and add an ‘o’ on the end. Don’t ask – it’s the law.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Thank God that bloke has shoes,” they were saying to themselves, “judging by the state of what’s hanging out of his jeans! Now if only he could afford some underwear…”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“Thailand is a very difficult country to leave, you see, and diving there is a whole load of fun. Still, it’s not renown as a quick path to riches – and anyway, I was rubbish at it.”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty

“gnomic”
― Tony James Slater, Kamikaze Kangaroos!: A trip around Oz in a van called Rusty