The Archer Quotes

“I could kill you with a pinecone.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“My God, how long would you have let me wander around Prague before you said 'hold up a minute, Helga, this isn't Japan!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Untie me so I can kill you.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“No, Shawn, he did a lovely little choreographed number and tapped it out in Morse Code.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“All that rational thinking had to be thrown out the window. This was why he liked irrational thinking so much better. It took less effort and the conclusions you came to were harder to refute.
- Brandt”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“It's not a bomb, you ignorant fuck! It's a grenade!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Yes, things catch fire," Shawn ground out as he switched the safety off and cocked the gun threateningly, letting it dig even further into Brandt's cheek. "But hotel rooms do not just catch fire! Automobiles do not just catch fire! And my favorite pair of sweatpants do not just catch fire!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“What's a miffin?"

"Trippy muffin.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Quiero Taco Bell, asshole?”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Obsessive compulsive" Nikolaus mumble in amusement.
"I would rather eat a grenade than make a line with two different colors!" Remy responded in a pained voice as he pointed at the pad of paper. Thiago snickered as he continued to torment the Cajun with his blue pen.
Speaking of grenades, though... Brandt had a timing device around here somewhere. What had he done with it?”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Death by muffin.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“I'm like the fucking Three Stooges of espionage. All three of 'em. All rolled into one!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“So you st that charge, and then put yourself right smack in the middle of the blast radius?" Brandt asked with what might have been open admiration. Remy nodded curtly. "Marry me," Brandt requested with unholy glee.
Remy cracked a smile and Carl laughed softly at Brandt's side. Shawn and Nikolaus both sat motionless, staring at Remy disbelievingly. Thiago rolled his eyes and cleared is throat. Nothing Remy did surprised him now.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Bad Dixie! No more sex for you!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Yeah well, sorry I 'fucked' at you”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Brandt certainly didn’t see what the big deal was. Things caught fire; it wasn’t always Brandt’s fault.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“He'd just called Shawn a bottom, though, and Shawn looked pissed. Call Remy a bottom and he would jump you and let you screw his brains out. Call Thiago a bottom and he would look at you for five minutes, shrug, and the go about his business. Call Nikolaus a bottom and he might cry. Call Brandt a bottom and you might get a blowjob, you might just get blown up. But call Shawn a bottom?
Carl supposed he was about to find out what happened when you called Shawn a bottom.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Jesus! We can't just sit here and twiddle our thumbs. Who's the brains of this outfit, anyway?"
"I think that was Shaw," Carl said wryly as his mind landed on an idea. "Before he went mad' that is. Now I suppose it's you, God help us. "
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Shawn asked in a hurt voice. "I've not gone mad!"
"Uh huh. What's the plan, Dixie?" Carl asked as he spared Shawn a glance before turning his gaze back on Remy. Remy blinked at him.
"You can't put him in charge," Shawn protested. "We'll be in the shit and he'll stop to get an ice cream, for fuck's sake!"
"What's wrong with ice cream?" Remy asked in an insulted voice.
"I think you missed the point of the comment," Thiago muttered as he sat down in the kitchen besid Nikolaus.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“I'll stick this so far up your ass, the smoke will come out your ears.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Stop thumping me, you fuck!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Somebody kick Che Guevera in the nuts for me please!”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Submerge, bitch.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“You prance in my mind, Mary.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“The next person who attempts to shoot, stab, strangle, maim, maul, or manipulate me in any way, shape, or form is going to have one fuck of a hissy fit to deal with!” he shouted angrily and actually stomped his foot in the process. “That goes for you too!” he shouted at Gray as an afterthought.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“The only things that scared Brandt were water and fire extinguishers.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“You speak French, Thiago?” Shawn asked in amusement. Thiago shook his head in answer. “Don’t worry. Neither does Remy,” Shawn snickered. Thiago actually fully smiled at him then, and Shawn marveled at how much the wide grin changed the man’s appearance. He looked almost relaxed. “I heard that, couyon!” came Remy’s voice one last time. “That was the point, dear.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“What's shaking, Gatorbait?”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“Fucking pyromanic, Crazier'n a male crab, that one.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“I can hear until you start whispering,” Shawn said defensively. “Then you just hiss like a snake and it all blends into one long Remybabble.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer

“I know you’re arguing. I can smell it. Stop it and get on with it.”
― Abigail Roux, The Archer