Stalking and Psychosexual Obsession Quotes

“The Pathe & Mullen (1997) sample almost unanimously reported deterioration in mental and physical well-being as a consequence of the harassment. (..) These victims often described a preoccupation with their stalker, one commenting: "I think I’ve become as obsessed as the stalker himself". (..) Whenever stalking victims present it is essential to assess their suicide potential and continue to monitor this. (..) Victims of stalking often respond to cognitive-orientated psychological therapies because stalking breaches previously held assumptions about their safety. The belief of victims in their strength and resilience and their confidence in the reasonable and predictable nature of the world are frequently shattered, to be replaced with feelings of extreme vulnerability and an expectation of pervasive danger and unpredictable harm. Cognitive therapies attempt to restructure these morbid perceptions of the world that threaten the victim’s adaptation and functioning. (..) Avoidance can respond to behavioural therapies such as prolonged exposure and stress inoculation, which aim to assist victims to gradually resume abandoned activities and manage the associated anxiety.”
― Julian Boon, Stalking and Psychosexual Obsession: Psychological Perspectives for Prevention, Policing and Treatment

“The overriding message to anyone seeking a protective injunction, especially if the stalker is an ex-intimate, is that the period immediately following the issuance of the order is an emotionally charged time and often one of heightened risk of physical harm. These orders should never bring with them expectations, at least in the immediate term, of protection and resolution of stalking.”
― Julian Boon, Stalking and Psychosexual Obsession: Psychological Perspectives for Prevention, Policing and Treatment

“It is crucial to establish early in treatment that the victim has actually conveyed, in unambiguous terms, that they do not want the stalker’s attentions. Victims may not understand that many stalkers are socially incompetent and will fail to grasp obvious, let alone subtle, social cues. Words to the effect of: “I do not want a relationship with you” require no additional explanation, and any attempts to elaborate will only give the stalker the opportunity to challenge the victim’s decision. Victims are discouraged from making statements like: “I’m not interested in/too busy for a relationship right now” (stalker reads “but she will be later”), or “I already have a boyfriend (stalker reads “She’d have me if he wasn’t in the way”). (...) Where appropriate these words should be delivered directly and in person, and in a public or other safe venue. (...) There may be an initial escalation in the stalker’s intrusions as a consequence of the thwarted contact so it is necessary to reinforce the perils of giving in to frustration. Victims must be warned that if a stalker phones them 100 times and the victim finally loses her resolve and responds, the stalker has learnt that persistence (indeed, 101 phone calls) pays off.”
― Julian Boon, Stalking and Psychosexual Obsession: Psychological Perspectives for Prevention, Policing and Treatment