Training Season Quotes

“Honey, are you being safe?'
'I wear my seat belt, yes.'
'Does this Rob Lovely wear a seat belt too?'
Matty sighed. 'Mother, seat belts should be worn at all times when in a moving vehicle. Didn't you teach me that?'
'So long as we're both talking about condoms here, then I'll leave it.'
'Consider it left.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“(Matty) 'I'm going to a corn maze.'
(Elliot) 'Oh, bitch. You've lost your ever-loving mind.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“Matty blinked. 'You're passing up whips for shopping?'
'You're bitching about shopping?' Rob countered.
'I feel so torn!' Matty pulled at his hair. 'Oh my god. You suck.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“The Room was darkened, and Rob struck a match to light candles. As the comforting scent of jasmine and vanilla lifted from the candles around him, Matty took in the dark sheets on the bed - the ones Rob liked because they showed Matty's jizz better.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“Sometimes it was awesome to sit back and let another person take control. So long as they did really good, dirty, hot things to him.
- Matty”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“Why are you so upset? You were almost late to the Olympics, and this isn’t even close to as important,” Rob said.
“Don’t throw the Olympics in my face, bitch.”
“I’m not your bitch,” Rob countered as he stepped on the gas. “I’m pretty sure you’re my bitch.”
“Sure, eat some come from a guy’s ass, and he’s all, ‘you’re my bitch now.’ Wouldn’t my mother be proud?”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“Wait, this guy has a kid?” Elliot gasped over the phone. “What hot mess have you gotten yourself into, girl?”
“Shut up, Elliot. Like you haven’t slept with a load of hairy daddies in your time.”
“But they weren’t, like, actual daddies.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“I wonder what it would be like to have a threesome?” Matty mused.
“I’ve offered,” Elliot said.
“Yeah, but I’ve seen your dick and it’s really not impressive enough to make it worthwhile.”
“My dick is amazing!”
“Amazingly average. Besides, Rob’s a little possessive.”
“Matty!” Donna said. “Rob, can you control him?”
― leta blake, Training Season

“Forget it. It’s on Rob’s tab. That he never pays.”
Rob shrugged. “Send the gay mafia to collect and I’ll pony up.”
“I’ve got my request for assistance in already, but they’re kind of busy fighting for our right to join the heteros in the misery of marriage at the moment.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“You killed a chicken for me?” Matty asked, kind of grossed out and somehow crazy flattered. “Well,”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“Never let it be said that rural locales took any shine away from this bitch.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“I made my first fire last night and I didn't even set myself aflame! It was fantastic". "If you need more, there's plenty where that came from". "Sure, I'll take your wood anytime!" Matty fought the smile that threatened to engulf his face, and he coughed, using it for a cover of his laugh. But Rob laughed outright. "Consider me at your service. Though, technically, It wasn't my wood. So maybe it's more accurate to say that you'll take George's wood anytime. Matty cracked up. "No, definitely not. I'm sure it's aged and gnarled".”
― Leta Blake, Training Season

“Rob shoved Matty’s legs back, lunging down to kiss him again. “I’ll take care of you. Let me decide what you need.”
― Leta Blake, Training Season