Tales of a First-Round Nothing Quotes

“(I remember winning a bet with Jeremy “Lazy-eye” Mylymok over whether or not a passerby’s tits were real. He said yes. I leapt out of the pool and ran across the street to ask her, and she admitted they were fake and brand new. Mylsy still owes me 50 bones for that, come to think of it.)”
― Terry Ryan, Tales of a First-Round Nothing

“I wanted Bird Dog to play that game like I wanted a sack of hammers across the jaw.”
― Terry Ryan, Tales of a First-Round Nothing

“Within minutes of entering this stranger’s house, I had my briefs off and it was naked hoedown time.”
― Terry Ryan, Tales of a First-Round Nothing