Grief as it is Quotes

“We are all dust and nobody will ever be remembered, we all die at the end but if I will be remembered, I want to be remembered for my ability to love and feel.”
― Hana Z., Grief as it is: a published journal of love and grief

“I was hearing voices of my parents in the morning, they were fighting a very
small argument but i was feeling very scared. I was feeling as if my stomach was on fire. I was
holding one hand with another hand. I was afraid someone would shout at me, I felt like crying. I
feel the same while writing this. Zahir I am fearful of people abandoning me and leaving me, you
know this. Out of all the people in the world I was sure about one person, one person that could
and would never leave me and you did that. I am understanding the situation but I am not being
able to accept the situation. Zahir I felt abandoned. I am just looking for the reason. Why did you

do what you did? I am not feeling good at all. It makes me feel the kind of hate for myself I have
not felt ever. I try to be calm. But here comes all the thoughts. I sit with those thoughts, I cry
with these thoughts but this feeling just does not go away that we are not together. I try to make
myself understand that this is just a phase it will end but then the question stays the same, when?
- Grief as it is by Hana Z.”
― Hana Z., Grief as it is: a published journal of love and grief

“I sometimes feel like a slap when I hear the word functional. How much does a counselor know about your own life? Do not feel too much, do this, do that, these are the tools to process emotions, these are the tools to do this, do that, what the fucking tragedy. Isn’t the whole purpose of existence is to feel and feel more and a bit more?”
― Hana Z., Grief as it is: a published journal of love and grief

“I sometimes feel like a slap when I hear the word functional. How much does a counselor know about your own life? Do not feel too much, do this, do that, these are the tools to process emotions, these are the tools to do this, do that, what the fucking tragedy. Isn’t the whole purpose of existence is to feel and feel more and a bit more? There is no logical rationale on why one should wait for years for a person. Maybe I did not feel the need to find a reason. In a life where I try to find the reason before opening a 30 second video, wasn’t that something that’s enough. Love is not supposed to be rational. When I feel, I feel. I feel a lot. And to doubt the love I had makes me doubt everything I had. Was anything real then, if not this? I do not know what I am feeling, but whatever it is, it is heavy. I did not know I had the capacity to feel this much and I did. I read once there are more atoms of hydrogen in a spoon than there are spoons on the earth. At that time it seemed very vague and funny, trivial but funny. But now that you are gone this is making me feel the heaviness of one spoon because a mare spoon is holding too many incomparable things. I hold too much of you inside of me, I hold too many memories inside of me that I am somehow on the verge of blasting but yet somehow I am not full. The waves of your memories come again and again. These tears are a witness that I loved you and I loved you well.”
― Hana Z., Grief as it is: a published journal of love and grief