Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People Quotes

“Going forward, I expect you to treat me respectfully. If you don't or can't, then please don't say anything to me. (compromise) I don't deserve to be treated this way, and I'm not going to accept it anymore”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“The truth is that most of us are uncomfortable handling conflict of any kind, so we overlook problems and hope they'll go away. But that never happens”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“The number one rule when resolving conflict is never to open a conversation with the word you.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“don't know why you feel you have the right to treat me disrespectfully and, frankly, I don't care. I've put up with it long enough, and I need you to stop treating me this way.” (“I” phrase)”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“resolving conflict to maintain strong relationships. Conflict is one of the most difficult situations”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“You don't want your opening statement to sound like an attack the other person's character, so always begin with an “I” phrase:”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“When confronting someone, refrain from using the words always or never. When you say to someone: “You always…” or “You never…,” the other person is going to focus more on that one word”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Conflict is one of the most difficult situations we face because it thrusts us out of our comfort zone.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“I value our working relationship…. Going forward I feel we'll be able to work through any problem.” “I'm glad we talked this out…. Now I'm confident we can work through any problem.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“I'm happy…we could resolve this.” “I'm glad…we talked this out. We have a better understanding of what happened.” “I'm pleased…we were able to clear up the misunderstanding.” “I'm thrilled…we were able to come to an agreement.” If you're not sure the solution is agreeable to everyone, voice your phrase of resolution as a question. “Are you satisfied with the solution?” “Is there anything else we need to talk about?” “Do you feel we have a better understanding of what caused the problem?” “How do you feel about the solution?” “I'm happy with our compromise. How do you feel about it?” Incorporating Phrases of Resolution In the first scenario in which Emma took responsibility, Kate added a phrase of resolution: “I'm glad we talked this out.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“To me it wasn't trivial. Do you have a few minutes now? I'd like to talk this over and find an agreeable solution. (compromise) Let's go into the conference room where we can talk in private.” After closing the door, Kate said: “Why don't we try to look at the situation from each other's viewpoint? That may help us find an agreeable solution.” (compromise)”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Why don't we each state our viewpoints? Then we'll see if we can find common ground.” “We need to resolve this somehow. The only way to do that is for each of us to be flexible and try to come together.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Here's how you see the issue: ________. And here's how I see it: ________. Let's see where we can come together on this.” “Since we don't agree why this happened, let's lay out the facts and come up with a solution we both can live with.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Let's go somewhere in private and try to resolve this.” “Let's talk this over and find a suitable compromise.” “I'd like to hear how you saw the situation so that I better understand.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Let's talk about this. I need to know why it happened and how we can keep it from happening again.” “Can we talk about what happened?” “I feel that we need to talk this out so it doesn't happen again.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“I'm sorry if I seem overly sensitive.” “I'm sorry if I misunderstood your intent.” “I'm sorry that we need to have this conversation.” “I apologize if I misunderstood what happened.” “I regret that I have to bring this up.” “Please forgive me for feeling this way.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Sample Phrases of Apology Offer a phrase of apology whenever you feel it will encourage empathy between the other person and you.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“or if the bully denies the behavior, give examples. Understand that you may not get the bully to back down and agree that the behavior was out of line. Be prepared to offer your resolution by stating specifically how you expect to be treated. If the bullying continues, document each incident. Your documentation should speak for itself so include date and time, what the person said or did, and if there were any witnesses to the conversation.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Vince replied: “If you meant that as a joke, I now have a better understanding of where you were coming from. (understanding) And, my understanding is that your idea of joking is to call someone out in front of other people.” Mark shrugged and laughed uneasily.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Apply the following principles when dealing with a criticizer: The first time someone criticizes you, choose whether you want to ignore the remark or act on it. If you choose to respond, try saying: “Thank you for your opinion.” This is apt to end the conversation.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“Whenever someone criticizes you, view the criticism a growth opportunity. Analyze the criticism. If it's valid, decide what you can do to improve. If you need additional training to correct the problem, ask for it. If the criticisms continue and have no validity, you can continue ignoring the criticizer, continue thanking the person for his or her opinion, or decide to confront the person. Before entering into a conflict resolution discussion, think through the likely conversation. You may catch the criticizer off guard, and the person may respond as Mark did by brushing off the criticisms as jokes. Don't let the person off the hook or the behavior is apt to continue. Make sure the person understands why the criticisms create a problem for you. State specifically how you expect to be treated. Agree on a resolution and offer a phrase of reconciliation.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities

“That's because your words convey your message, but your actions convey the feelings and emotions behind it.”
― Renée Evenson, Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Over 325 Ready-to-Use Words and Phrases for Working with Challenging Personalities