The Invisible Partner Quotes

“Part of the answer is that self-knowledge has never been one of our strong points. To the contrary, even the most elemental knowledge of oneself is something that most people resist with the greatest determination. Usually it is only when we are in a state of great pain or confusion, and only self-knowledge offers a way out, that we are willing to risk our cherished ideas of what we are like in a confrontation with the truth, and even then many people prefer to live a meaningless life rather than go through the often disagreeable process of coming to know themselves.”
― John A. Sanford, The Invisible Partner: How the Male and Female in Each of Us Affects Our Relationships

“Real love begins only when one person comes to know another for who he or she really is as a human being, and begins to like and care for that human being.”
― John A. Sanford, The Invisible Partner: How the Male and Female in Each of Us Affects Our Relationships

“We must not, however, think that the anima is “good.” The anima is neither good nor bad; she just is. She wants life, and so she seems to want both good and bad, or, rather, she is not concerned with these moral categories. That is why working with the anima is always a delicate matter. One can no more deliver oneself over to the anima lock stock and barrel than one can surrender the whole of oneself to any particular psychological functions or quality. It is also the anima who seems to arouse a man’s capacity for love. When we first fall in love we are flooded with powerful, life-giving emotions. This is why the anima can be best described poetically and not scientifically, dramatically and not concretely. Yet, as we have seen, a man’s relationship with her must develop beyond the mere sensation of falling or being in love, as he must come to perceive that the life-giving feminine soul is within himself. He cannot afford to let his anima live only in projection onto a woman, but most reach beyond this projection to search for the soul within himself.”
― John A. Sanford, The Invisible Partner: How the Male and Female in Each of Us Affects Our Relationships