How to Test Negative for Stupid Quotes

“Ask Americans how many senators it takes to solve a problem, and they’ll say, “We don’t know. It’s never happened.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“I would describe the atmosphere as a circus without a tent.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Schools are for education, not indoctrination.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“It’s been almost nine years since those warnings, and I haven’t stopped talking. Why? Because only dead fish go with the flow. Because every advancement in art, science, philosophy, medicine, technology, cooking, and golf happened after someone challenged the rules and said, There’s a better way. Because my people sent me to this place to solve problems, not make new friends.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“the brain is an amazing organ—it starts working in the mother’s womb and doesn’t stop until you get elected to Congress.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Don’t be part of the problem—be the whole problem.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Clockwork Orange.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“The job isn’t just about advancing good ideas—it’s also about killing bad ones.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“follows: If the question in debate contains”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Governor Edwards quipped, “The only way I can lose this election is if I’m caught in bed with either a dead girl or a live boy.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“took an hour and a half to watch 60 Minutes.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“I had to work harder than an ugly stripper—”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“tough as a boiled owl.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“What you do is what you believe and everything else is just cottage cheese.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“An eye for an eye just leaves both sides blind. Nobody wins.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Graduate from high school, get a job, wait until you’re twenty-one to get married, and don’t have kids until after you’re married. If you do those things, your chance of being poor drops to 3 percent. That’s true no matter your race.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“I believe in lifting people up through jobs and opportunity. Others keep trying to do it through welfare and fear. Many”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“The book of Matthew got it right: “For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul?” Or, if you prefer, and in the words of the iconic recording artist Meat Loaf, “I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“One day I got a call from a dentist in Denham Springs, just east of Baton Rouge, about an advertisement I had placed in the real estate section of the newspaper for my father, whose health was failing. My father owned a small office building in Zachary with two suites. He worked out of one and rented the other. “I’ve been to the office,” said the dentist, “and I’m very interested.” We agreed on the price and he told me to send him a draft of the lease. I did, but when I called him about it he had no changes. I remember thinking that this was odd, because my leases are tough, but I just figured he was anxious to move in. After he signed the lease and mailed it back to me, he called me and said, “Mr. Kennedy, there’s just one more thing. I lost my dental license because of some spurious and unfounded allegations against me, and in order for me to move into the building and pay your dad rent, I’m going to need my dental license back. Can you help?” I was dumbstruck. But that’s when I knew. Right away, I told him the deal was off. I told him I was going to tear up the lease and he should never call me again. I was embarrassed at how gullible I had been. But I didn’t know better back then. When you have no firsthand experience with graft, you don’t see it coming. I had always been an optimist. I had always tried to see the best in people. After that, I became a slightly paranoid optimist.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Now, sitting contentedly in my twenty-fourth-floor office with a nice view of the Mississippi River, just a few weeks after the election, I wondered what the newly elected governor might want from me. I had a passing thought that he might want to tap me for a position. At the time, I had a reputation around New Orleans as a young, relatively bright lawyer who’d been educated out of state. Like the governor, I abhorred corruption (and still do). I wasn’t part of the vast political network that had come to swallow state-level politics during the Edwards years. That meant I might be one of the people who could help Governor Roemer, who had campaigned hard against the political status quo, get up and running before he took office the following March.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“The endorsements helped Roemer to rocket from last place to first on election night, winning the election outright after his runoff opponent Edwards quit. (There’s no question that the newspaper endorsements helped Roemer. In today’s world, most voters trust newspapers like they trust gas station sushi, but not then.) Many people, including me, did not expect Roemer to win. You also might find it interesting that a young, bright, and affable guy named Mark McKinnon was a Roemer political consultant on his campaign. McKinnon would go on to also advise presidents, senators, and governors; to be a cable TV star and columnist; and to cofound the No Labels political movement. President Bush calls McKinnon “M-Kat.” He’s what cool looks like. See his Wikipedia photo. I met Mark shortly after joining the Roemer team. I’ve known him a long time. Here’s how long: I knew him when he was poor.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“My dad always told me, “Son, you’ll never know love until you have a child. It’s not like the love for a parent, or a spouse, or a sibling.” At the time, I had no frame of reference, so I didn’t get it. Preston reminds me every day of my dad’s wisdom. He was, of course, correct. I probably would have spent my career in New Orleans, practicing and teaching law—if not for one phone call.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“We don’t need more multicultural specialists or self-esteem experts. We need two hours of reading. Two hours of math. An hour of science, history, and social studies. And homework. If you don’t pass, you don’t get promoted. If a kid is late to school and it’s his fault, he should have to sit on the floor. Cell phones should be forbidden. And every principal should be a cross between Socrates and Dirty Harry.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“If you ever have to operate a forklift, the first thing you do after starting it is LOWER THE FORKS. I also learned another lesson: Life is hard, but it’s harder when you’re stupid. Dad worked my brothers and me assiduously to teach us the value of work and to incentivize us to go to and do well in college. But I know he worried about us, because some of the work we did could be dangerous. It was also exhausting.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Another example is Senator John Fetterman from Pennsylvania, also a friend. I don’t agree with a lot of what John advocates, but I like him. He’s sui generis. Whether you agree with him or not, John’s a shrewd, astute senator, in my experience, even if he sometimes looks like he paused his videogame to come vote on a bill. He also took on the Hamas wing of his own party on Israel, which caused some of his staff members to resign. John is a captivating person who’s delightful to be around, even when I don’t agree with him, which is often. Maybe it’s because we are both “acquired tastes.” Maybe it’s because we both play outside the pocket. Maybe it’s because we both understand you can’t make everyone happy unless you are alcohol.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“When a senator has a bill with a real shot at passing, they have to lobby their colleagues, the media (to get publicity), and leadership. If you want the bill to go through a committee first, to garner more support, you have to get the committee chair to put it on the committee’s agenda. You can choose to bypass the committee and bring the bill directly to the floor, but that takes a majority leader’s blessing, a committee chair’s approval, and often the committee ranking member’s consent. If one of them says no, the bill dies. Even if you get through that, you still need House approval and the president’s signature. Senators use leverage—like threatening to block a nominee—to gain support for their bills. But that can backfire. What goes around comes around.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Most senators also introduce “messaging bills” that have no chance of passing but play well with voters. I’ve done it. I once proposed requiring able-bodied adults on welfare who have no minor children to work twenty hours a week. Welfare, I believe, was meant to be a bridge, not a parking lot. I knew Democrats and a few Republicans wouldn’t pass it, but I wanted voters to see I tried—and maybe plant a seed in my colleagues’ minds.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“And it’s not just the standing rules of the Senate that constrain you. The Senate legislative process is also governed by a large body of “precedents” created by past rulings of the Senate presiding officer or by votes of the Senate itself. And don’t even get me started on the arcane procedure for substitute amendments, first- and second- and third-degree amendments, and the priority given to bill amendments. If you don’t believe me, try reading all this stuff yourself. After two pages, you’ll run away screaming. After five pages, you’ll want to set them on fire. They make no sense, and they probably were never meant to. Once again, if I were king for a day, and could get the votes, I’d rewrite them. And one of the first things I’d change is the power of the majority leader and committee chairs. I think senators should have more latitude to bring a bill to the floor without getting the permission of a senator whose first pet was a dinosaur.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“Either way, I have to dodge reporters, who are like stray dogs—once you feed them, you can’t get rid of them. (For the record, I like dogs much better than reporters. Like I always say, God is great, dogs are good, and people in D.C. are crazy.) Reporters are also like hyenas. They hunt in packs. There are scores of them. Then I step into the vaunted chamber of the United States Senate. Where the magic happens. Or is supposed to.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will

“I just have a different approach. I enjoy learning and I enjoy policy, and knowledge is power. That may be a cliché, but clichés become clichés because they’re true.”
― John Kennedy, How to Test Negative for Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will