Christmas Fling Quotes

“Imagine having this incredible computer inside your head, billions of neurons all firing at once, giving you the ability to walk and talk and think and feel, and you chose to use all those unimaginable complexities to be mad at your brother for no reason.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“He's so hot. I take it all back. Poke holes in those condoms, please have his baby. We need that DNA in our bloodline.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Fuck it.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“It was one of my most deeply held beliefs no one should ever be allowed to talk on the phone in public without headphones and anyone who did ought to be sent directly to the centre of the earth”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Sorry, we ate it just outside Stoke-on-Trent.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“He listened,’ I said simply. ‘Fuck me,’ Joel muttered. ‘The bar really is low for straight women, isn’t it?”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“I keep people at a distance because if you don’t let them in, they can’t let you down and give you another reason”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“If there was, heaven probably had a Costa. I couldn’t see them going for a Starbucks.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“there was, heaven probably had a Costa. I couldn’t see them going for a Starbucks.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“wasn’t used to someone else’s presence having this kind of effect on me. I wasn’t used to anyone else’s presence having any kind of effect on me.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Another person can’t complete you,’ I said, no weight to my words whatsoever. ‘Not everyone has to have someone.’ ‘No,’ he agreed. ‘But everyone deserves someone. You deserve someone.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Whoever is operating is in charge of the music,’ I nodded. ‘I’ve timed it: if you start the Eras Tour when you scrub in, you’re wrapping up a cranioplasty right before they shoot the confetti at the end of “Karma”.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“It’s called the Yerkes-Dodson Law and it states that low arousal causes things not to be remembered in the first place and high arousal causes too much stress for them to be remembered, meaning we only retain things in circumstances of optimum arousal – and don’t you dare start giggling because I just said arousal three times.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“He’s so hot,’ Joel whispered into my ear as I leaned in to hug him goodbye. ‘I take it all back, poke holes in those condoms, please have his baby. We need that DNA in our bloodline.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“life has only taught me one thing, it’s that there is always time to stop for shortbread.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Unless his family does skin you alive,’ Joel commented. ‘Some things are better with the skin on, Lau, like a nice little potato wedge.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Question. If you do shag him and you get free rent, does that technically count as sex work?’ ‘You tell me, you’re my accountant.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“It’s too easy to get into a lot of debt as a student in this city, especially when you didn’t have any money to start with.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Jack Frost no longer nipping at my nose so much as slapping the shit out of it.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“If there was”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“It was like being locked inside a Zara changing room with Big Bird’s hot Scottish cousin.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“there’s no point trying to talk to a man when he’s hungry or in love.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“It hadn’t taken long to build walls around my heart. I’d started so young, I could barely remember a time they weren’t there, protecting me. But keeping them up, fortifying my defences, strengthening my resolve, that took time. Years. I wasn’t about to let them down so easily.”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling

“Whoever is operating is in charge of the music,’ I nodded. ‘I’ve timed it: if you start the Eras Tour when you scrub in”
― Lindsey Kelk, Christmas Fling