Ask a Matchmaker Quotes

“One trick George and I have implemented to deflate any escalating argument is having a safe word or phrase to instantly add some levity. For us, it’s “simple as this.” It’s a ridiculous line from an adult film—that we never watched, I swear!—”
― Author Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“When you break up with someone, you invite the possibility of both of you becoming entirely new people. And it’s because you’ve seen different things, met different people, and felt different things. Even if you haven’t fallen in love or dated a new person, you will have grown in ways you could never imagine or maybe haven’t considered. Your professional outlook has changed. You’ve watched new shows and listened to new music. You’ve both faced different adversaries and come out with new perspectives. Even if you think you’ll always be the same person with the same feelings, I promise you that you won’t.”
― Author Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“Someone who receives the girlfriend experience gets to avoid the emotional duty, compromise, and general responsibility of a relationship …”
― Author Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“and where there was a yawning chasm between them. She felt physically attracted to him and they were on the same wavelength. Their dates were enjoyable and they”
― Author Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“As access to the family home becomes increasingly restricted, dysfunctional zoning laws - critiqued by Oldenburg- further exacerbate the issue by prohibiting commercial establishments in residential areas, making it nearly impossible for third spaces to flourish and foster community connections.' ...... 'Then there's the technology that took vibrant, real-life communities of the past and siloed them into isolating digital spaces; the conversation might be lively online...but many of the people talking are sitting alone in their homes instead of, as Ariel from the The Little Mermaid sang, 'where the people are.”
― Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“We've always been a country that prizes the individual over the greater group. Never forget: We were founded by a pack of men who were tired of being told what to do. Then, starting in the 1950s, pop culture began to promote the nuclear family. A thriving singular family unit seemed like a good way to encourage security amid the anxieties of a post-World War II nation. The success of just your family - over, say, the other ones on the block - became a point of pride in a country desperate to rebound after fighting two nightmarish wars in less than fifty years. Collectivism, which (surprising no one) puts value on the collective society, may have made up the building blocks of other Western nations. But it was deemed un-American.

As the nuclear family became more important, the role of the family evolved. The goal of raising children isn't just to exponentially increase the amount of love and connection in the household or to add supportive new members to the wider social fabric. Instead, parents are essentially told their job is to effectively launch the nuclear families of tomorrow and to keep our individualist society spinning. Parents are encouraged to rear independently minded kids who will be self-supporting individuals by early adulthood. Not only should they be going to school and/or getting a "good" job, but also in their own homes and settings themselves up for financial success before their prefrontal cortex is finished settling. During this time, they should also be searching for a life partner to build their own nuclear family with. If someone hasn't "left the nest" by twenty-five, everyone involved is seen as a failure.

So a lot of dating-age people are left feeling like lonely cogs in the machine of life, instead of valued humans who are allowed to ask for connection and empathy.

”
― Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“

We've always been a country that prizes the individual over the greater group. Never forget: We were founded by a pack of men who were tired of being told what to do. Then, starting in the 1950s, pop culture began to promote the nuclear family. A thriving singular family unit seemed like a good way to encourage security amid the anxieties of a post-World War II nation. The success of just your family - over, say, the other ones on the block - became a point of pride in a country desperate to rebound after fighting two nightmarish wars in less than fifty years. Collectivism, which (surprising no one) puts value on the collective society, may have made up the building blocks of other Western nations. But it was deemed un-American.

As the nuclear family became more important, the role of the family evolved. The goal of raising children isn't just to exponentially increase the amount of love and connection in the household or to add supportive new members to the wider social fabric. Instead, parents are essentially told their job is to effectively launch the nuclear families of tomorrow and to keep our individualist society spinning. Parents are encouraged to rear independently minded kids who will be self-supporting individuals by early adulthood. Not only should they be going to school and/or getting a "good" job, but also in their own homes and settings themselves up for financial success before their prefrontal cortex is finished settling. During this time, they should also be searching for a life partner to build their own nuclear family with. If someone hasn't "left the nest" by twenty-five, everyone involved is seen as a failure.

So a lot of dating-age people are left feeling like lonely cogs in the machine of life, instead of valued humans who are allowed to ask for connection and empathy.

”
― Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love

“We've always been a country that prizes the individual over the greater group. Never forget: We were founded by a pack of men who were tired of being told what to do. Then, starting in the 1950s, pop culture began to promote the nuclear family. A thriving singular family unit seemed like a good way to encourage security amid the anxieties of a post-World War II nation. The success of just your family - over, say, the other ones on the block - became a point of pride in a country desperate to rebound after fighting two nightmarish wars in less than fifty years. Collectivism, which (surprising no one) puts value on the collective society, may have made up the building blocks of other Western nations. But it was deemed un-American.

As the nuclear family became more important, the role of the family evolved. The goal of raising children isn't just to exponentially increase the amount of love and connection in the household or to add supportive new members to the wider social fabric. Instead, parents are essentially told their job is to effectively launch the nuclear families of tomorrow and to keep our individualist society spinning. Parents are encouraged to rear independently minded kids who will be self-supporting individuals by early adulthood. Not only should they be going to school and/or getting a "good" job, but also in their own homes and settings themselves up for financial success before their prefrontal cortex is finished settling. During this time, they should also be searching for a life partner to build their own nuclear family with. If someone hasn't "left the nest" by twenty-five, everyone involved is seen as a failure.

So a lot of dating-age people are left feeling like lonely cogs in the machine of life, instead of valued humans who are allowed to ask for connection and empathy.

”
― Maria Avgitidis, Ask a Matchmaker: Matchmaker Maria's No-Nonsense Guide to Finding Love