Only the Clonely Quotes

“We need to normalize our brains being assholes so we don’t feel alone. <”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I know. I just...I haven't shaved my legs. And my panties are kinda granny panties, because Ruth was still figuring out the clothing printing machine and wasn't able to fine-tune it. And⁠—”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“She moves forward, crossing the brief distance between us, and grabs my collar. With that, she hauls me down against her and kisses me fiercely. There's no tongue, just a firm press of her lips to mine, but it manages to be full of longing. Ruthie pulls back and stares up at me, her expression brimming with emotion. "I love you." I'm utterly floored. "You...do?" She nods, rubbing her nose against mine. "I do, and I don't mind that you were watching over me. I think it's very sweet.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Then you don’t mind if I push? If I tell you I’m going to kiss you?” “I like it,” I confess softly. Kazex growls, his eyes closing. “Kef, Ruthie. What you do to me.” “Tell me.” I’m practically squirming with excitement. I want to know. “I didn’t want to just ask you for kisses tonight,” he says. “I wanted to push you for more.” I’m utterly titillated. “What kind of more?” “Heads, I lick your cunt, and tails, you can watch me jerk off.” He blurts the words out so quickly that they practically tumble against each other. I can tell he’s been thinking about that a lot, and I can also tell by the way he tenses and draws back that he expects it to be too much for me. But that hot, needy, yearning sensation is curling in my belly. “We can flip for that.” He groans again. “Ruthie.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I think about humans and how they like to touch constantly, and I take Ruthie’s hand in mine. If she says anything—noodle, piercing, or even no—I will drop it and apologize. But she looks over at me, smiles, and tightens her grip on my hand. My heart soars. “I love you,” I blurt again. “I love you, Ruthie.” She blushes and her expression turns shy. She doesn’t answer, just squeezes my hand tightly.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“don’t want you to feel embarrassed for wanting me.” “Yes, but you said you wanted to go slow. To take as much time as you need. I don’t want you to feel pressured by my needs. Because if we’re being honest? I’m always in need when it comes to you.” I love hearing that. I move toward him, grabbing a fistful of his uniform and tugging him toward me. “Will you give me a kiss, then? Show me just how much you need…?” “Right now?” “Right now,” I agree. “Because I’m feeling it, too.” He moves closer, his hand skimming along the line of my face. He leans in⁠— “What the kef is going on here?” The door swishes open and Sakkar steps into the room. Oof. Busted. CHAPTER SEVENTEEN KAZEX I could cheerfully strangle Sakkar for his keffing awful timing.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Because you're mine?" I ask softly. "Because I have always been yours." And he leans down and puts his head in my lap, where our joined hands were just a moment ago. I hesitate, because touching him like this feels more intimate than we've ever been... and I literally just showed him my tits. But it's different like this. It's softer, more tender. I flex my fingers and then carefully run them through his soft, dark hair. He groans, hugging my legs and holding me close, as if he's never wanted anything more than this moment. I scratch lightly at his scalp, then brush his hair back from his brow. He has tattoos that disappear into his short hair, and I wonder how far back they go. I even trace the pointed line of one ear, surprisingly delicate on such a big, strong guy. "No matter what you decide, I'm fine with all of it," he reassures me. "I just want to be with you. More than that, I want to be yours.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Hey, Kaz?" "Yes?" My voice breaks, and I clear my throat, grimacing. Her nearness makes everything in me act up. "Can I get your help with something...delicate?" Uh oh. What's troubling her? Has someone been cruel? Someone in Port? Or is it tonight's game? Do I need to go shake Zaemen? The need to protect Ruthie from the universe surges over me again. "Tell me who to kill and I'll do it." Her smile flashes and Ruthie shakes her head at me. "Nothing like that. Let's just talk in private, all right?”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I'm sweating. Is it hot in here? Are the environmentals on? I tug at my collar as Ruthie gazes at me with expectant eyes. "You want me to pierce your breast?" "The nipple, actually. It's a fairly common piercing for humans and it's supposed to be really appealing. I like the thought of doing it but I didn't want to go to Sakkar. Do you mind helping me?" "Of course not." Just the thought of Sakkar seeing her naked breasts and touching them makes me want to punch something. "I'm glad you came to me." "I wouldn't approach anyone else with this." There's a strange little smile on her face. "I trust you.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Are...you all right? You said you weren't feeling well earlier." Her expression grows distant. "Just had some thinking to do is all." "Wish I could help with that. We all know I'm not much of a thinker, though." To my surprise, Ruthie looks upset at my response. "Don't talk about yourself like that." It makes me feel warm to hear her defend me, but it's not necessary. "I know my strengths, Ruthie. We all have our roles. Mine is best when I'm the muscle and someone else does the thinking." She frowns and reaches her hand toward me, then hesitates and pulls away. Inwardly, I groan. She doesn't realize just how badly I wanted that small touch. Then, she knocks on the table and gets to her feet. "Hope you're ready to lose your paycheck in sticks.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Ruth-Ann gives my shoulder a little squeeze. "Just because we're clones doesn't mean we don't have our own thoughts and feelings. Look at the crew. None of them are alike in personality." She's not wrong. Kazex is laid-back and easygoing. Dopekh is gullible and somewhat emotional, going from one doomed romance to another. Sakkar is a sour puss. Erzah is a risk-taker and loves to come up with ideas. Aithar is an innocent sweetheart. Zaemen would forget his own head if it wasn't tied down. Jerzec is a flirt and a little ambitious. I can pick them all out by the tone of their voices. I know each one's tells when we gamble.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“It's always unnerving to look at the two of them, because it's like looking in a mirror...except not. Their features are exact replicas of mine, closer than even twins. Some of the a'ani have different spacing to their features, or one might have a softer jaw or thicker brows. Ruth, Ruth-Ann and I really look as if we've just stepped out of a mirror funhouse. It's freaky, and I think that's why I'm so obsessed with piercings and shaving my head. I'm desperately trying to establish “me,” and that confidence gets eroded every time I look one of them in the eye.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I'm such a loser. I can't even be happy for him that he's potentially found someone. All I can think about is how miserable it makes me. How I had the opportunity to kiss him and show him that I cared and I was too chicken-shit to do it.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“You okay, Ruthie?" Oh, just throwing up in my mouth. "Did she just give you her number?" He chuckles. "Indeed. She insisted I write down her contact information so I can send her a message." Isn't that cute. "Lucky you." Kazex's smile fades as he studies me. "You sure you're all right? You look troubled." I hate seeing the happiness fade from his face. I hate that I'm the big party pooper for the day. It just makes how I'm feeling worse. I'm the problem, not Kazex. He doesn't owe me anything. "I ate something that disagreed with me. Tell the others I'm going back to the ship, all right?" A look of concern crosses his face. "I'll come with you⁠—" I put a hand up, silencing him. He's going to be kind and friendly and patient like he always is, and I'll just lose it even more. "I don't need you." When he flinches, I feel like a monster. God, I'm just making this worse by the moment. "I'm going back alone. You find the others. I'll see you back home.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I keep my expression benign as I lean against one of the shops on Port's main street, but internally? Internally I'm plotting Gia's death. Every flirty smile the woman tosses Kazex's way, I mentally picture punching her face. She's got gorgeous, thick curling hair and a winsome smile that she flashes like a weapon. And she's flirting with Kazex. And he's mine, goddamn it. My anger and frustration turn to worry as the minutes tick past and Gia and Kazex continue to talk at her sled. The packages are in the trunk, and yet he's not returning to my side. Gia keeps talking, reaching out and touching his arm and tossing her hair, and Kazex is smiling back at her. He's enjoying this. A sinking feeling enters my gut. A realization. I've made a mistake. This is my future, all because I didn't act. I'm in the process of losing him even as I stand here, and I'm helpless to do anything about it.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I'm alone with Ruthie, but she doesn't seem to want to look in my direction. If anything, she seems to be looking everywhere but at me. Is she upset over last night? Hating that we slept together? Because I keffing loved it. Every last moment of it. I got to sleep with my female. I got to count her pretty piercings and stare at her while she slept. I got to breathe in her scent and feel her skin pressed up against mine. I got to share a blanket with her. It was the best keffing night of my entire life, followed closely by the first night I laid eyes upon her...and then probably followed by the moment I realized my cock worked again, after years of suppressants. Those two moments have been the best, but last night topped them all.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Do you need to noodle?”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“I hate this. I hate that my mind is such a mess. I wish I could just pounce on him and kiss him for hours. I wish I could straddle him and just ride his cock until we both came, but I know it would mean a lot to Kazex, and I don't want to break him. He gave me his heart the very first day I stepped on this ship and I'm terrified of trampling it. He means too much to me for me to just use him. Kazex deserves the best, and until I can figure myself out, he's off limits.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Why weren't you sleeping? As if I can tell the female of my dreams that I was very busy jerking off to her before she came in? I grit my teeth, doing my best to keep my hips as far away from Ruthie's curled form as possible while she tucks her head under my chin and snuggles against my chest. This would be the greatest moment of my life if my cock weren't throbbing and rock-hard. It doesn't matter that I'm uncomfortable. Ruthie needs me, and I want to be here for her. The ache in my groin will go away soon enough...I hope.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Why are you being so nice?" Kazex's smile grows broader, and it really is a wonderful smile. His entire face lights up and his eyes are so kind. When he's smiling like this, I like to look at him. "Do you want the real truth or do you want the polite version?" "I want the real truth. Don't sugar-coat anything for me." I swirl noodles around the end of one of the strange, not-quite-chopsticks utensils and deliver the wad of food to my mouth. "It's because I'm in love with you." I nearly choke on the noodles, pressing the back of my hand to my mouth to keep everything inside as I cough. "W-what?" "I'm in love with you," Kazex says. "The moment I saw you, I knew." He puts a hand in the air at my panicked look. "You don't have to love me back. I know it's sudden. I'm just telling you the truth of how I feel. I'm helping you because I can't walk away. Because I love you and you need someone. I want to be that someone.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“Are you taking me back home to Earth?" I go still. I hate the hope in her voice. She's dazed from the drugs so she doesn't realize— or maybe it hasn't sunk in that she's a clone. That she was never on Earth. That there's no “home” to go back to. "I won't lie to you, Ruthie. You're a clone, a created person just like me. There's no 'home' for us. We were created in a lab." Her breath sucks in, but after a moment, she seems to accept this. "You're a clone, too?" "See my red skin? It marks me as a clone." I keep my voice calm and steady. "I don't know why yours isn't red, but that's a question for someone else to answer. You're a clone to Lord Straik's mate, but it doesn't mean that you're the same person. You just look alike. Can I have your hand? Just for a moment?”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“As I tuck the blankets around her, she stirs. "It's dark," I say, keeping my voice soft so I don't hurt her head. "I'll make sure it stays quiet, too. You can rest here." She licks her lips. "Water?" "I'll get you some." I want to smooth her hair back from her face, but I don't dare touch her without an invitation. She doesn't belong to me. From this moment on she's her own person, no matter what her past was like.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“The woman in my arms—Ruthie—is unconscious before I even make it to my quarters. My heart hammers with worry in my chest, but I tell myself that if there were true health issues, Sakkar would have noticed them already. She's just tired and hurting and needs to rest. I hope. I don't want to do the wrong thing for her. She needs a champion and I knew the moment I saw her that I'd be hers.”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely

“My head throbs. Wincing, I close my eyes, trying to fight off the worst of the pain, when I'm suddenly jerked forward by the cuffs on my wrists. I yelp, and then, to my surprise, I'm freed. "Take her, Kazex," the blue alien says, running a hand through his short hair. "Don't let her run. We're going back to the ship right away. Ruth has to know." "Of course, Lord Straik." A surprisingly gentle arm goes around my waist, and then I'm being supported against a larger body that smells pleasant and doesn't treat me like I'm a sack of grain to be thrown around. He guides my arm over his shoulders and holds me close. "I've got you," he says in a comforting voice. "You're safe." "Ruthie," I murmur as we fall in line behind the blue alien. "He called me Ruth. I'm not Ruth. I'm Ruthie." A name is a small matter in the scheme of things, but it's all I've got. "Ruthie," the man holding me up murmurs. "I'll remember." The”
― Ruby Dixon, Only the Clonely