Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths Quotes

“The cycle of trauma bonding with a narcissist or psychopath is biochemically addictive due to the brutal highs and lows and the unpredictable nature of the chaotic relationship. When pleasurable moments are few and far in between incidents of cruelty, this hot and cold behavior is known in behavioral psychology as intermittent reinforcement. The rare reward of kindness, affection, and validation is unpredictable causing dopamine to flow more readily in the brain than predictably stable relationships. This toxic love creates an addiction to the dopamine rush that has little to do with the merits of the person or the quality of the relationship. Research reveals that the brains of people reeling from tumultuous romantic relationships and heartbreak tend to show heightened activity in the same reward and craving related regions of the brain as in the brains of those addicted to cocaine and other drugs. This "withdrawal" effect is potent in romantic adversity and is part of the reason so many struggle to leave and heal from toxic relationships.”
― Shahida Arabi, MA, Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths: Stop the Cycle of Manipulation, Exploitation, and Abuse in Your Romantic Relationships

“A trauma bond is a dysfunctional attachment that forms out of betrayal, seduction, a power imbalance, danger, as well as hot and cold behavior known as intermittent reinforcement. You feel addicted to the person who has harmed you and feel compelled to seek their approval and maintain the relationship. This is because a trauma bond with a toxic or narcissistic person trains you to look out for your survival rather than your best interest.”
― Shahida Arabi, Breaking Trauma Bonds with Narcissists and Psychopaths: Stop the Cycle of Manipulation, Exploitation, and Abuse in Your Romantic Relationships