I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend Quotes

“He left his booty juice in my car!” I”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“People pleasing only hurts the one doing the pleasing.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Sometimes, you can be a real jerk, and then other times, you’re nice to me. You say things about being by my side and making it out together,” I explained. “I say what works in the moment.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Oh, hell no!” I bolted for the door, titties flopping with each step.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I can’t pop up here every time you’re in danger,”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I vomited right into the bitch’s pussy! I gagged as I stared at the chunks dripping from her inner”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Metice smiled, then he vanished.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“And though he'd told me very little about him, he listened. He was attentive, and he remembered things about me.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“What was it like? Your break with reality.” “They call it derealization,”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“And you know, our dreams are where our deepest desires get to shine.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I am so much more than my attachment to some man,”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Who did this to you?”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Remember when we used to get together and do that thing at sleepovers? The spell that’s supposed to let us lift someone with our fingertips? What was it? Light as a feather, stiff as a board. That never worked.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“You called?” the deep voice spoke from the corner where the apparent intruder stood. “Oh, hell no!” I bolted for the door, titties flopping with each step.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“The idea of making new friendships as an adult sounded as appealing as detangling my hair with a fine-toothed comb. With everyone bringing their own bag of drama and prejudices, tiptoeing around them became a nightmare.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I swear, I am done with dating!” Of course, I’d said it a hundred times before. Hell, every single woman over thirty-five had, but what was I supposed to do? Give up? Maybe that was the answer: wave the white flag proudly above my head, buy a few cats, and head off into the mountains, never to be seen again.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I took my thirty-almost-seven-year-old brain and overrode it with the mindset of a seventeen-year-old with no bills or business credit hanging over her head. We do what we must for the plot!”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I wish I could shut that part of my brain off that wants companionship. It would sure as hell save me a lot of heartache. The dating pool is full of piss and poor decisions, and the few of us still brave enough to swim in it are coming out with infections.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“The idea of making new friendships as an adult sounded as appealing as detangling my hair with a fine-toothed comb.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Every time we spoke, she went on and on about those damn fish in the sea. What she failed to realize was that the modern pollution of dating apps, social media, and #relationshipgoals had mutated the fish!”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“The point is, you human women really need to stop being so reckless. There are plenty of men on Earth. Can they really be so bad that you’re all turning to other worlds for the hope of love?”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I know there are men out there who still want love and appreciate a good woman. I know there are men who aren’t threatened by their partner’s success. It’s just harder to find them. Just gotta dig through the muck of men fighting to hold on to a relationship type that no longer has a place in our world.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“How is it that someone who is so impressive, someone with so much life under your belt, deals with such ridiculous men?”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I took my thirty-almost-seven-year-old brain and overrode it with the mindset of a seventeen-year-old”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“I threw another pillow at him,”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Are you done being mad?” “No.” I shook my head and put a spoonful of rice in my mouth. “Have another taco.” He pointed to the food in front of me. “Maybe that will help.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Sit and hush.” “Excuse me?” I rolled my neck. “Don’t order me around in my own home.” “I know you like to talk, but can you just not right now?”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“Am I allowed to speak, or are you going to slap me again?” He rubbed his jaw. “Damn, that actually stings.” “I’m not sure. Let’s try it and find out.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“What the hell?” I gawked at the horses and flinched when one turned to look at me with scorching red eyes. “You know, while you’re here, you should really come up with a new phrase.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend

“There was a connection between us, one I had to sever, because there was no way in hell I was going to fall for a demon. I didn't want him to be hurt, but I sure as hell wasn’t signing up to spend the rest of eternity with him. I’d picked up that book and put it back the hell down.”
― Jessica Cage, I Accidentally Summoned a Demon Boyfriend