Jingle Devil Quotes

“We all know you’re already on the naughty list, yet like to be told you’re a good girl by a man with a deep voice and a penchant for giving hand necklaces. Am I wrong? Didn’t think so. Now turn the page and read your hockey smut. Show me how beautifully you listen.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“Twas the night before Christmas, and I fucked my assistant in my house. My dick is no longer stirring… I’ve got nothing that rhymes with house and mouse doesn’t sound right.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“No smooth-faced boy will ever do it for me again.  Once you go stubble, nothing else is worth the trouble.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“He’s going to kill me with that anaconda in his pants. And I’m going to die with a smile on my face. No regerts. Not even one letter.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“Do you want to sit down at this table and wait for dessert? Or do you want to come home with me and let me eat you for dessert?”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“I’m sorry I’m repeating everything. I think your lips fried my brain.” “Then just wait till you find out what my mouth can really do.” “Sweet Mother of Mercy,” she whispers.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“He tastes like red wine and is just as intoxicating. His stubble is rough against my chin, and I want more. I want it rougher, harder. I want him to drag that stubble all over my body and mark me as his. But he kisses me at a lazy pace, exploring my mouth like he has all the time in the world, sipping at my lips like I’m a rare vintage he wants to savor.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“Mick leans down and this time his lips graze the skin behind my ear. “Are you chilly, baby girl? Or is it something I said?”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“Older men never really did it for me. Not until Mick Weller. He checks all my boxes, and I’d love nothing more than for him to invade my box with that tool in his pants.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil

“My gut clenches and my blood boils as jealousy gets the better of me. I have no claim to this woman on a personal level; she can talk to whoever she wants. That’s what the logical side of my brain says anyway, but my caveman side gives zero fucks.”
― Melissa Ivers, Jingle Devil